


More Than Just a Crew Member

by orphan_account



Series: GTA5!AU [1]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gang World, GTA5!AU, Gang!AU, M/M, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-12
Updated: 2014-07-12
Packaged: 2018-01-19 01:40:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 23
Words: 63,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1450597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>JUST SO YOU KNOW: I'm rewriting some stuff for this so please don't read this until I'm done and this message is gone. Thank you!</p><p>Despite Gavin knowing Ryan for over a year in the Fake AH Crew, he knows almost nothing about him, and he's going to change that. And when Gavin's past starts to catch up with him, Ryan goes against the odds to make sure that Gavin's safe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing a Freewood fic. I have no idea how long this is going to be so if it's an utter failure, I won't be surprised and I'm not gonna have a schedule set up for it. It'll just be whenever I have a new chapter. Gonna have a sort of slow beginning but we'll see how it goes. I hope you like it though.

We’re the Fake AH Crew. We may be small, but we’re a force not to be taken lightly. I’ve been a part of this crew for a good number of years. I’ve seen our small group grow ever so slightly over the years. But it fits, everyone has a role, their own talents, and we only need each other. We’re ruthless criminals, but we’re family as well because we look out for each other. I tend to be less than helpful and everyone gets annoyed with me and often says that one day that they’ll off me one day. After they yell and threaten my life, they always look at me for a moment and smile. I mess things up, true, but we’re in this together. I’ll always be there for them, and same for them.

My name is Gavin, but I’m usually called Vav. Let me introduce you to my crew.

First off, there’s Geoff. He goes by Grif on the streets. He’s the leader of our small crew. He thought long and hard when it came to choosing who was good enough to be in the crew. He’s strong, smart, and all around an interesting guy. When I first came to this country, he was the first person I met. Just happened to be looking for a hotel until I could find my own place when I ran into him. I had heard him starting to draw a weapon. In the blink of an eye, I had my own pistol pressed against his forehead. His gun wasn’t even fully out. He just stood there, wide-eyed, before I slowly lowered my piece, explaining I had no ill intent, just making my way through town. He simply chuckled at my accent and just struck up a conversation admiring my quickness. After talking for a long while, he offered me a place. It took some convincing, but I reluctantly agreed. We’ve lived together ever since. And one day, he came up to me and asked me to join his crew. After living with him as long as I had at the time, I agreed.

After Geoff, there’s Jack. He doesn’t really go by any nickname, but we just call him our builder because he’s always crafting up something for us. Jack is Geoff’s second-in-command; he was the first of the crew I was introduced to. He wasn’t all that impressed with me despite what Geoff had apparently told him. First thing he had me do was go to their shooting range, I pulled out my gun and was ready. When he flipped the switch, bullets flew as I shot all the targets as the popped up in their “heads” execution style. Needless to say, he was left dumbfounded. Most, if not all targets were shot before they were fully up. He smiled at me, gave me a firm handshake, and welcomed me to the crew.

Michael or Mogar as he known is a great friend of mine. His short temper but good nature made him a real interesting person to hang around. He doesn’t hesitate to call out bullshit on anyone or is quick to shut you up for any reason. He usually yells at me the most of the time but he’s always the first to back me up when I get myself into a tight situation. He’s helped me out in more than just a fair share of problems. Despite my quickness and excellent aim, I’m not that quick on my feet, if there are more guys than I can handle, I usually end up shot in the leg or arm or something. And Mogar is there to give me back up. Like the rest, he usually jokes around and says that he’ll eventually leave me for dead one day. I can’t help but smile at him as I limp behind him to our car where I patch myself up.

Another good friend of mine is Ray, or X-Ray, as I call him. Going on a long running joke that we’re super hero’s even if we are in a crew. I’m the only one that can call him X-Ray, though. He hates it when anyone else does so they all call him Brown Man. He told me that when he was growing up, people actually called him X-Ray because he wore glasses. When I first called him that, he was absolutely pissed and punched me in the face. Some while later when he explained himself, I told him we could have awesome super powers; that he would have x-ray vision that he needed his glasses for and I had slow motion powers because of my cinematography studies back in England. He smiled at the idea, and then he let me call him X-Ray after that. He still plowed anyone else that calls him X-Ray, that only his super hero pal could call him that. We may be in a rough and tough crew, but we’re the biggest super hero dorks you’ll ever meet.

Last, but certainly not least was Ryan…The Mad King as he’s known as. He was the most mysterious of all. I got along well with everyone when I got here, just not him. He knew my skills by the time Geoff introduced us, but he didn’t really say anything. What made it more uncomfortable was that he was wearing a black skull mask so I didn’t even know what he looked like for a while. After being all together in a crew for over a year, we weren’t really any closer than when we first met. He usually wore the mask all the time when we were at our hang out, whether it is working on cars, cleaning our guns, or just lounging around. He rarely spoke to me unless I had a question or he had one. I offer to help him out whenever he worked on anything but he usually said he got it under control and didn’t want me to mess anything up. I could tell he wasn’t being mean about it so I didn’t take much offence to it. Even in that year of not really knowing him any better, I had seen his face a couple months after our first meeting. It was an extremely hot day in Los Santos, and while everyone was out, he and I were still at the hang out. He didn’t know I was still there, I heard from where we keep a small fried him setting the mask down as he grabbed a beer. He had walked to where I was laying on an old beat up couch and he froze when he saw me using my phone. I glanced at him, and I didn’t make a big of it for his sake.

“I imagined that your hair would be darker…” I muttered as I went back to playing a game to kill time, taking a swig of my own beer.

He didn’t really say anything to me, just breathed an “Oh?” before sitting in the chair next to me. Maybe it was because the fact I didn’t make a big fuss about seeing his face, maybe it was he was something completely different. I had no idea.

But I still want to be friends with him. He seemed like a really cool guy. I looked at him as I put my phone away and sat up.

“Do you hate me? Or do you just not like me?” I asked him out of the blue. He seemed surprised at my question, looking at me with wide eyes.

“Wh-what? Why the hell would you ask me that?”

“We’ve known each other for a few months now. You never talk to me unless either of us have a question for the other or you turn me away from helping you. Yet I see you talking to everyone else all the time. Do you hate me? Did I do something to make you not like me?”

He sat quiet for a moment.

“I’m sorry, Gavin. I don’t know if I ‘hate’ you. I just don’t think we have anything in common to really talk about. And I don’t really care if that changes or not.”

He got up after that and walked away, I didn’t go after him, figured he didn’t want to talk anymore. And even now, a year knowing each other, we still weren’t any closer.

But I’m going to make sure that it changes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin is trying to get to know Ryan better so he's making Ryan accept his help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not really filler, because I want their relationship to develop a bit but I want it to take a bit of time, don't worry, it won't be extremely long for it to develop.

I watched Ryan as he cleaned all of our guns. I was sitting near Geoff drinking some whiskey with him as Jack worked on building some new silencers as many of ours had broken and Michael and Ray were making bets while listening to the football game on a radio. They were arguing and were settling said argument with an arm wrestling match. After I finished my glass, I refilled it and stood up.

“I’m gonna go help Ryan clean the guns. I haven’t done it in a while and don’t want to get rusty,” I muttered to Geoff as I picked up my glass. He just grunted.

“Fine, just don’t blow your dick off or something stupid like that, Gav.”

I smirked, walking to the work bench Ryan was at and promptly sat next to him, sitting my drink down off to the side. He glanced at me through his mask as I grabbed dirty parts and started cleaning them.

“I don’t need your help, Gavin.”

“Well tough shit, Rye-Bread. I’m helping. I need to make sure I can still do it properly after being so long since I’ve done it last.”

“I told you to stop calling me that,” he groaned. I picked up my drink with a free hand and took a sip.

“Yeah well, you should know I’m not one to listen,” I mused as I wiped down a piece with a cloth.

He scoffed, going back to his own work. We sat there in silence for over an hour, both just carefully cleaning each gun piece then putting each weapon back together. I finished cleaning my own pistol and started putting it back together. I looked at my empty glass and then to Ryan. I couldn’t help but notice the sweat coating his neck. Even after discarding the thick blue and black leather jacket, he was still extremely sweaty in just a white tee. The shirt was soaked in sweat, making it cling to every muscle underneath. I looked away before he noticed my staring and finished putting my pistol together. I sat it down and got up, taking my empty glass with me as I walked to the mini fridge. I sat the glass on top and left it there as I grabbed two cold beers, and returned to the desk. I sat them both down between us.

“Rye-Bread? I got you a beer. You look like you just got out of a pool. Here’s something cold for ya.”

He looked at the beers then to me, after a moment he looked around. Jack was still building silencers, Geoff was passed out at the table he was at, and Michael and Ray were still arguing, but quieter, as they listened to the radio and drank together. After a moment, Ryan nodded, lifting his mask up. He left it on his head but he at least freed up his face and wiped the sweat away.

“Thanks, Gavin. I was starting to get pretty thirsty, actually.” He said, he smiled as he opened the beer after I opened mine. But he still gave me a look.

“And stop calling me that.”

I smirked, “Not gonna happen, Rye-Bread!”

He rolled his eyes but smiled, mocking me under his breath. I took a large gulp of my beer before I started putting together Ray’s bright pink sniper rifle. It was such an amazing gun, but I couldn’t help but chuckle at the color before sitting the completed piece down. I figured Ryan was in a good mood, since I was able to get him to get his mask off.

“Rye-Bread, I want to ask you something.”

“Oh? I’d listen to your question, but that isn’t my name,” he replied with a soft chuckle. I rolled my eyes and sighed.

“Oh fine. Ryan, I have a question for you.”

“What might that be, Gavin?” he smirked.

“Why do you always wear your mask here. I mean we all know what you look like. Why do you need to keep wearing that mask?”

He went quiet. Sitting down the gun he had in his hand, looking up at me.

“To protect my family,” he muttered. “You all know what I look like. The other gangs don’t. I may be in this for my own reasons, but my family doesn’t need to be involved. They don’t need to be dragged into a huge mess because of me. Understand?”

I never heard him like this, before. Then again I never really talk to him. I nodded. I knew what that was like; trying to protect your family is a hard thing to do when your life is a chaotic one like this. I looked at him.

“Yeah, I understand. It’s why I’m in this country. It was the only way to protect my own family. You’re the lucky one in this so far.” I smiled at Ryan. He looked at me, his eyes weren’t as hard as they usually are, he glanced away as he processed what I had said.

“I never thought of it like that…I honestly never knew why you came here,” he admitted as he put the last gun together. I fitted the parts to the gun I was working on together as well, sitting it down.

“Well, Rye-Bread, how about some night we hit the local pub, have a few bevs and I can tell you about it? We never hang out anyway, how about it? Sounds like it’ll be top!”

He looked at me for a moment, and reluctantly nodded. “I guess I owe you that much.”

I chuckled at him, “You owe me a lot more than one night out for ignoring me for over a year, Rye-Bread!”

“Keep calling me that, and I’ll make it another year, Gav,” he snickered. We stood up as we both were finished cleaning the guns. He pulled his mask back down as he finished his beer and looked to everyone.

“Yo, shitheads. Gavin and I finished the guns. I’m gonna go work on the cars.”

A couple guys grunted their response. I grabbed the cleanest rag I could find and started wiping the grime off my hands. But then Ryan snatched it before I could finish, he gave me a bored look through his mask.

“Since you insisted on helping with the guns, I’m volunteering you to help me with the cars. You’ll need to learn this shit so I’m not the only one constantly fixing up these damn cars.”

I looked at him dumbfounded. He never let anyone help him with the cars.

I scoffed, “Fine, whatever.” I rolled my sleeves up so while I helped they wouldn’t get caught on anything. Ry tossed the rag onto the work bench and walked to the garage, me right behind him.

“Alright, Gavin, you’re gonna help me check the engines. Then afterwards I’ll show you how to change the oil once we get the cars onto jacks. Got it?”

I nodded. I knew nothing about cars, though so I knew it was going to take me a while to understand most of this nonsense. As he popped the hood to one of the cars, he asked me about how much I knew. I could just see him sigh in defeat on the inside already when I didn’t say anything. He started with all the basics of car care. It surprisingly wasn’t too hard to keep up with him. I held on to every word he spoke. I moved closer to him as he pointed to different caps under the hood, showing what fluid went where. Oil, transmission, coolant, and even windshield wiper fluid. But soon enough he was going in a complicated way and I struggled to keep up. I stopped him and explained what I didn’t understand; he nodded and reworded his statements until I understood again.

It happened a few times that I had to stop and have him back track to help me comprehend everything. Night was starting to fall and we hadn’t even changed the oil yet.

“Ryan, I thought we were changing the oil?”

“Oh,” he paused, “I’m sorry Gavin, I was too caught up teaching you everything that I forgot. How about we call it a night and we can do that tomorrow morning. Before it gets too hot, it can get extremely uncomfortable being under a car when it’s 100 degrees out.”

Smirking, I waved it off, “Nah, ‘s no problem. You seemed to be enjoying showing me all of this, I just noticed it was getting late.”

He lifted his mask up, smiling at me.

“Thanks, Gavin. Well, we should get going, then. I don’t hear any of the other guys in the other room so we should head home. Which reminds me, since you live with the boss, do you need a lift to his place? I only got my bike but I have two helmets.”

“That’d be top, Rye-Bread! Let me put our stuff away while you get ready to go. I’ll meet you out back.” I wiped my hands as I left the garage, and as he mentioned, the place was empty. I pulled the heavy drapes covering the windows to see Geoff’s ride still parked down the road. He must’ve been driven home by Jack. I picked up all the empty beer bottles left around by the others, did a quick clean up and locked all out gear up. Making sure everything was secure, I grabbed my and Ryan’s jacket and met him out back. I saw his mask poking out of the bag on his bike, his helmet replacing its place. I tossed him his jacket, heard his thanks and put it on. I fastened my helmet on as he fired up the engine and climbed on behind him.

I usually didn’t hold on to whoever rode a bike. But I was normally on either Ray’s or Michael’s bikes. I wasn’t used to sitting on Ryan’s motorcycle. It was shaped differently and I wasn’t sure how fast it was. I carefully leaned forward and wrapped my arms around his waist. I could feel him shift in his own seat, definitely not used to having someone holding onto him. We rolled out onto the street and took off into the night. His bike was definitely faster than the others, and it felt awesome going this fast. As we rode on, I slowly got used to how his bike moved and was able to sit up without having to cling onto him. I was looking around a little; until suddenly hitting a bump in the road, falling into Ryan’s back, grabbing his sides to steady myself.

Despite how loud the motorcycles engine was and with how loud it was with the wind rushing past us, I could distinctly hear his deep laughter. I smirked in my helmet and held onto him just a bit the rest of the ride. When we got to my place, I hopped off, clicking off the helmet straps and took it off. I strapped it onto his bike and smirked at him.

“Thanks for the ride, Rye-Bread. Don’t forget you owe me a night hanging out, got it?” He laughed and nodded, said his good-bye and sped off. I headed in, saw Geoff sprawled over the couch, passed out. I left him there and headed to my room. I recalled my actually enjoyable day with Ryan, even if it was just cleaning the guns and looking at the cars. I smiled to myself.

Maybe being his friend will be easier than I thought…and maybe I just never tried hard enough.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin spends a whole day with Ryan. But before they meet up, Gavin has some slight thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooooooh, the thoughts are coming in~ Starting to actually become Freewoody ;) How long can Gavin ignore those thoughts, I wonder.

I woke up the next morning, stretching and going into the bathroom. Looking at my reflection, I saw all the dirt and grime from working on the guns and cars didn’t come off my skin fully. The sheets hadn’t looked at all stained so at least I wouldn’t have to wash them or anything like that. I started the shower, letting it warm up. A hot shower felt good even if it was already over 70 degrees in the desert of a city. I shed my clothes and stepped into the shower. Running my hands through my hair, soaking if quicker in the water, I could practically feel the dirt coming off. After soaking my body, I grabbed the bottle of shampoo, poured some into my hand and massaged it into my hair. After lathering it up, I stood in the stream of water and let it wash out itself. As the warm water relaxed my body, I couldn’t help but think back to last night.

I thought about the whole day with Ryan. Helping him clean the guns, sharing a drink, listening to him talk as he taught me as much as he could. I smiled recalling our time together, after rinsing my hair, I grabbed the bar of soap and proceeded to wash my body. As I did, I kept remembering more specifics about hanging out with Ry.

I remembered stealing glances at him the whole time: when he took his mask off, the way his shirt clung onto his sweat soaked body, how his dirty blonde hair hung messily in front of his face, and how his body flexed as he worked on the engine of our crew’s car. I shook the thoughts from my head; I just want to be friends with Ry, so far I like being his friend. I rinsed off my body, promptly shutting off the water. I grabbed a clean towel, wiped off most excess water before tying it around my waist. I grabbed a smaller towel and wrapped up my hair in it to dry faster.

I gathered my clothes and returned to my room, dumping them on the floor near the closet. I dug through my drawers and grabbed a fresh pair of boxers, putting them on after removing the towel around my waist. I went to my closet, grabbing a shirt and jeans. I dressed myself quickly; I wanted to meet Ryan earlier that I usually get there so I could help him out with the cars.

I finished getting ready: got all my clothes on, brushed my teeth, my hair all messed up as I usually have it. I turned to leave, but I was walking out, I tripped on one of the towels. Instinctively, I reached out and grabbed onto the closest thing. I clung onto the dresser, while I regained my balance, I remembered how it felt when I held onto Ryan when I was on his motorcycle. Both when we first rode off and I just was holding onto him and when I clung onto him when I thought I was gonna fall. As I stood, I couldn’t get those moments out of my head; feeling his muscular body through that thick coat of his.

I ignored it to the best of my ability and went to the kitchen where Geoff was.

“You’re up early,” he commented.

“And you’re hung-over, Boss,” I replied.

“Quit being a smart ass. Why are you up so early? I may have a hangover but I know you didn’t get home ‘til real late. What the fuck were you and Ryan doing?”

“Oh, well he was teaching me about the cars. He’s the only one that fixes them, so I offered to help him with it. He’s teaching me about them but we forgot to change the oil. I was gonna go in early and help him change it this morning.”

He nodded, pouring a cup of coffee, “You taking your bike?”

“Yeah, your car’s still at the shop. And I sure as hell ain’t walkin.”

“That’s right…not like I’d let you drive it anyway. I’ll have Pattillo pick me up later when I decide to head over there. Gonna rest a bit until this hang over isn’t so bad.”

“’Kay, see ya there,” I called as I walked out. I got to my bike, putting on my helmet, clasping it on before revving the engine to life, peeling out of the driveway onto the road.

I took a short cut to our hang out, wanting to get there quicker than I usually do. I pulled up, killing the engine. I got off, opened the garage door as I rolled my bike in before closing it again. I took off the helmet and laid it on the seat.

The car was up on a jack, I went over and saw someone laying underneath.

“Rye-Bread, that you?” I asked as I nudged his leg with my foot.

I heard a grunt in response as he laid something down and came back out.

“Hey Gavin. I wanted to wait for you to get here but it was getting hot fast so I just started without you.”

I smirked at him, “No worries. I’m not used to coming this early anyway so I don’t mind.”

“Well I haven’t done the other car yet,” he said, nodding over to the outside, “And I still need to check Geoff’s since he left it here.”

I asked him about what he’d teach me today. Just mostly how to change the oil and what to look for. He told me that he was almost done with that car and he’d show me on the other. I offered to get him a drink but just water since it was still relatively early in the day. He accepted so I headed to the living room to get some water bottles. My phone buzzed and I pulled it out, Michael was calling. I answered as I got the water.

“Yo, Mogar, what’s up?”

“Hey shithead, listen. Brown Man and I aren’t comin’ today. We’re hanging out at his place. We might go cause some chaos later too, our funds are running short. Wanna join in?” I could hear his excitement at the end, he definitely enjoyed doing jobs with X-Ray and I, but if I’m gonna get this friendship with Ryan going, I really need to focus on it.

“Sorry dude, I’m at the shop already with Ry. I’m helping him out with our cars. Maybe next, okay?”

“Aw, little Gavy Wavy too chicken to rob a shop with his best friends?” He teased, “Why are ya being a pussy about this? You love getting into trouble with us!”

“Micool, you I do! But I’m already helping Ryan! He wants to teach me stuff about the cars!”

“Man, whatever. Let me know when you’re done being a lame ass Busta’ and hang out with us.”

He hung up and I chuckled, he was an odd one at times. I didn’t let it bother me so I just returned to the garage as Ryan was jacking up the other car. I went up behind him, ruffling his hair to get his attention and handed him his water. He smiled his thanks to me and took a drink. I watched as he drank the water, gazing at the hair stuck to his face from sweating, the dull sheen of light reflecting off his moist skin, and how his adam’s apple moved up and down in his thick throat. I took a sip of my own to swallow down a lump in my throat. I couldn’t help but take in his broad facial features, seeing how masculine he was compared to most of us. Jack was the most masculine of all of us but Ryan was right behind him. I just wasn’t used to seeing his face this much before. And I know he takes it off a lot, I guess I just never really noticed until now. I cleared my throat, catching his attention.

“You ready, Gavin? It can get kind of tight under here but you should be fine. You’re a lot smaller than me.”

I barely understood what he said, I was so focused on not staring at him that I wasn’t even listening to him. After a moment I understood what he was saying and joined him as we went under the call. He started to explain about changing the oil: how often to change it, how much to put back in, how to know what oil to use. As I laid there, everything about him kept flashing in front of my eyes. It was getting rather difficult to pay attention, I mostly was only hearing his voice but not anything he was saying.

I couldn’t understand why. Why was he so hard to pay attention to? I thought it went well last night, I remember almost everything he showed me. I just stared up at the bottom of the car, Ryan babbling on beside me, I didn’t even notice him stop talking until he called me by name.

“Gavin? Gavin. Gavin!!”

“Huh? What?” I replied quickly, looking at him.

“You know, if you don’t want to learn how to do this, it’s fine. I’m sure one of the others would want to learn this instead,” he said.

“N-no, sorry. I just….I’m still remembering everything from last night,” I lied.

“Oh, sorry. I forgot about how much we went over last night. Hey, you don’t need to help me today, I can just show you next time. I can show some other stuff later today, alright?” He smiled.

“Y-yeah. That’s fine,” I smiled back. We both got out from under the car, Ryan looked over at me.

“I heard you on the phone earlier, if you want to join them with whatever, I don’t mind.”

“Nah, it’s good. I was wondering if I could just hang out here with you?”

“I’m okay with it, just don’t get in my way then. Hey, when’s the boss gonna be here?”

“He’s got a hangover so not for a while. And he’ll have to wait for Jack when he does decide to come if he does at all.”

He nodded, going back under the car. We spent the time talking about nothing at all. Just anything to pass the time. I got a call from Geoff, he wasn’t gonna come and neither was Jack since he finished all the silencers yesterday. I told Ryan it was just us today and what everyone was doing. After he finished the cars, instead of going to a pub like we initially planned yesterday, we just drank here and just talked. I didn’t drink as much as I usually would since I would need to sober up in order to ride back to Geoff’s.

We quickly ran out of things to talk about so we sat in silence for a while. I had stopped drinking and was sobering up. I was putting our drinks away and had turned around to have him right behind me suddenly. I looked up at him in surprise.

“God Ryan, don’t do that, you mong idiot!” I sighed as I caught my breath.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. Hey, I need to tell you something. Remember a few months back when I said I didn’t care if we were friends or not?”

“Yeah, what about it?”

“I’m sorry I said that, I didn’t mean for it to sound like I didn’t want to be friends with you at all. And when you avoided me for a while I just thought that’s what you had thought. So suddenly us talking reminded me about it and I just wanted to apologize.”

I looked at him, he never really apologized for anything so this was kind of shocking. I didn’t want that to get the best of me so I played it off a bit.

“You? Mad King Ryan? Apologizing to me? You must be messed up in the head if someone as ruthless as you were apologizing! You’re not sick are you?”

He laughed and rolled his eyes, which I just happened to notice were a shining blue. I mentally slapped myself. I need to stop that.

I accepted his apology and decided to go. He walked me out as I rolled my bike out of the garage and was putting on my helmet. I smiled in my helmet even if he couldn’t see, and we said our good-byes. I kicked the engine on and sped home. When I arrived, I saw the TV on through the window, I quietly entered, in case the boss was asleep. He wasn’t so I said hello and went to my room. I cleaned up my clothes and towels, throwing them into the hamper. I lay in my bed at an awkward angle so I could see outside the window. Not a cloud in the sky and the moon shined brightly. I took a deep breath before just falling asleep in my clothes.

Another day with Ryan, and it was amazing.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone sneaks into Gavin's fantasy one night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not used to writing masturbation really....forgive me...

Days seemed to fly by faster now. They also seemed more enjoyable as I spent more and more days with Ryan. He often would actually ask for my help, despite everyone ragging on me on how useless I am. We all laughed it off, I messed up a lot even when helping him out, he’d just groan and help me fix or clean up the mess I’d made. We’d talk for hours, debating against each other, to the point we’d get so frustrated with each other we’d start yelling at each other and Geoff would shut us up. He’d send me on a job just so we weren’t together and everyone could work in peace as Ryan finished his own stuff. 

Several weeks later, Michael came with me during a job, nothing big; just get our payments from our “protection services” for those trying to stay out of sight for a while. On the drive back, I was counting our profits, groaning.

“Michael, we have to go back. Bloody idiot is short again. We’re supposed to get $2,000 right? There’s only $1,700.”

Michael groaned louder, “Godamn prick. I swear Geoff should just stop dealing with this guy. Sure he pays but we never fucking get the full cut the first time. Stupid asshole.”

I sat there in silence as he turned around and we headed back, thinking about Ryan. We’d become so close so fast, I’d been having trouble getting him out of my mind for a couple weeks. Doing the slightest thing would remind me of doing something similar with him. Out of everything, I keep thinking about his face. I saw his face more than anyone now, he even would put it back on if he heard any of the others approaching. I asked him but he always says it was to make sure that it was really them, but even when it was them, he’d leave it on. And after it was just us, he’d leave it on for a while, or just not take it off again.

Michael parked the car when we got back to the dump of a home we left; we both got out and went up to the man. We both got our pistols out and had him at gun point, Michael demanded the rest of our pay.

“You better fucking give us the rest of the payment. You know, my pal Vav here is a great shot. He hits his target, you know his skill. Don’t think we’re bluffing, he’ll break your Godamn hand. Give us the rest of the money or you’ll pay. I’m sure Grif will understand if we have to get rid of your hand.”

He hurriedly pulled out the rest of the cash, Michael snatched it and left with me right behind. We drove off and I made the final count, I smirked and looked at him.

“You really scared him, Michael. We got an extra $200!”

“Fucking seriously? That’s great! We needed some extra money to get more ammo so Geoff will like that! Just don’t tell that stupid fuck about it, or he’ll try to get out of paying all of it next time.”

I snickered, putting all the cash away and hid it in a compartment in the car. I started daydreaming for a bit until Michael grabbed my attention.

“Gavin, what’s up with you and Ryan lately? You’ve practically been inseparable since you started talking all of a sudden. You fucking bail on Ray and I all the time now! I don’t give a shit if you want to be friends with him, but stop ignoring us!! Quit being a prick and acting like you got some fucking school girl crush on the guy!”

“I don’t act like a bloody school girl, Micool!” I all but squawked, “Ryan and I are friends! I’m just glad we’re hanging out finally! Here, tell you what. You, X-Ray and I all go out for bevs this weekend, okay?”

He rolled his eyes but smiled, “Fine, but your bitch ass is paying since you’ve been a prick.”

“Seems fair.”

It went silent as we didn’t really have anything to talk about. But boy did I feel embarrassed at the mention of having a crush. That couldn’t be true. I couldn’t have a crush on Ryan. I barely even knew the guy despite all we talked about. I sighed internally and let my mind wander, just empty thoughts about nothing at all.

Then things shifted, as every time I would constantly remember something about Ryan. Anything would lead back to him and I would think about him. I focused and got my mind off Ryan for a while, thinking about going to a pub with Michael and Ray. I started talking to Michael to pass the time until we got back to the hang out. When we got back I was pretty exhausted. It wasn’t real late but I just wanted to head home. I told Geoff I was gonna go back, that I was taking my bike. He waved me off and I walked out. I was getting ready to go when Ryan came outside.

“Hey Gavin, I wanna ask you something,” he stated.

“Yeah, what’s up, Rye-Bread?” I asked with a smile. I could almost see him smile under his mask.

“Gav, do you wanna hang out sometime? This weekend?”

“I-I’d like to, Ryan. But I already made plans with Michael and Ray,” I muttered, “We haven’t had a night together with just the lads for a while so we were gonna go out together.”

“Maybe some other time then, would that be good?” He asked.

“Yeah, sounds good!” I replied as I fastened my helmet. I waved to him as I started my motorcycle, heading straight home. I didn’t bother watching TV or anything, I was too tired. But when I sprawled across my bed, I just had an urge.

I hadn’t gotten off in a while, I felt the need at just the thought. I could feel my heart rate already increasing as I sat up and unbuttoned my shirt, tossing it to the floor, then hastily unbuckling my belt and I kicked off my pants. I sat in only my boxers as I slipped my hands under the thin fabric. I shuddered out a breath as I slowly palmed myself, humming as I did so. But it was too slow for my liking; I quickly fished a bottle of lube from my night stand. I squirted some in my hand and warmed it as I spread it over my fingers before taking hold of myself. I gasped at the wetness that surrounded my cock, slowly sliding my fingers over my length, biting my lip as I teased myself by rubbing the tip with my thumb. I groaned softly, using my free hand and grabbing a couple dirty magazines I had also gotten out, opening them up to beautiful women filling their pages. I gazed at them as I let my imagination go.

But as I looked at them, it started having an opposite reaction. I found it quickly becoming a problem. I stopped and pushed them away, fishing out a guilty pleasure magazine filled with handsome men instead. I quickly flipped through and found a muscular, well-built man standing in just tight jeans as they slid down his hips. I started teasing myself as I started to imagine the man doing it. Imagining his hand grabbing hold of me, feeling my body up with his thick hands and his hand in my hair. But as I kept the man in my mind, his features were changing. Instead of a brunet with green eyes and a dark tan, he became a bit lighter with his tan, his hair becoming a dirty blonde and shining blue eyes. I moaned as I lay myself back down on my bed, thinking of the man towering over me on his knees.

I pulled my own hair, imagining the muscular man taking control. I pumped myself harder and harder. Whimpering as I felt a familiar warmth building in me. I kept thinking about the man, pressing his weight down on me, feeling his mouth all over my neck as he left love bites all over. I could picture him moving in front of my view, finally seeing his beautiful face as I whispered his name.

“Oh god, Ryan…” I hummed, my toes curling as I pumped myself harder, moaning his name.

“Ryan…oh please. D-Don’t stop…don’t you bloody stop!” I groaned as I drew closer and closer. I was so close but just couldn’t reach. I tightened my grip on myself, rubbing my tip harder and harder, moaning louder. I was so close but I needed just a bit more. Through my closed eyes, I saw Ryan smirking devilishly at me, leaning down and purring softly in my ear.

“You’re the only one for me, Gavin…”

Imagining him saying that to me, it made my heart skip, moaning as I released into my hand, “R-Ryan!” I gasped.

I panted heavily, humming as I came down from my high. I relaxed into my bed for a moment, but after that moment, my eyes flew open.

Oh bloody hell, I just munked off to Ryan. What the hell was wrong with me!?

*~*~*Few days later*~*~*

It was the weekend and I was with Ray and Michael at the bar. We had only been there for a couple hours but I was already downing a fifth beer. They both eyed me as I drank.

“Dude, what’s up with you lately?” Michael asked, “I know things might be getting hard for you or something, but drinking it away is gonna do shit for you.”

“Ugh, piss off, w-will ya? I’m perf’ly fine, Micoooooool. I know wh-when I’ve had ‘nough.” I slurred a bit.

“Man, you really need to chill,” Ray tried, “ever since you and Michael did that job together and you left, something happened because the next day you were brooding like a bitch and avoiding everyone. Grif was about to deck you, ya’know. I’ve never seen him that pissed at you. Just relax and whatever’s going on with be fine. Just chill out.”

I scoffed, I didn’t need a damn lecture. They wouldn’t understand, they couldn’t either. Not what I’d been dealing with. I’ve been finding it revolting to just look at women in a sexual way anymore, having trashed all those magazines. Then replacing them with images and magazines with men with dirty blonde or light brown hair and lightly colored eyes. Anything that closely resembled Ryan.

They would never understand that I’ve been lusting over a member of our crew. I was head over heels for Ryan and none of them knew.

I don’t think I could handle it if they did. And if Ryan found out, I would have no idea what to do…


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin got drunk and took a day off, then the next day Ryan takes him out drinking. Except, it wasn't the kind of place Gavin was thinking of.

Michael and Ray managed to get my drunken ass back to my place later that night. I stumbled through the hallway. Geoff didn’t seem all that impressed but he drank more than I do so he didn’t say anything. I practically fell through my bedroom door. I crawled helplessly to my bed, passing out for the night.

I woke up the next day in the late afternoon. My head was throbbing in pain. I groaned but forced myself up and went to the kitchen after I changed to take some pain pills. I sighed and decided to stay home. I knew I was too hung over to go to the hang out; all the noises would be too much. I slumped onto the couch and turned on the TV, flipping to a random sports channel for just something to listen to while I lay on the couch. I thought back to last night about popping off at Michael and Ray about my drinking last night. Since the night I munked off to Ryan, I did my best to avoid him without bringing anyone’s attention. He would often ask me to help him or offer to help me but I always declined, claiming I had something to do or could handle it myself.

He often would just look at me for a moment before walking away. I would watch him as he did, my eyes trailing down his back to his firm ass. I’d bite my lip before looking away. This was getting ridiculous. After just being sprawled on the couch all day, I gave up and went back to bed early that evening.

 

The next day he came up to me, I was expecting him to ask to help him with something but he surprised me.

“Go out drinking with me. Tonight,” he stated simply. I stared at him for a moment.

“W-wait, what? Tonight? Why do you want to go out drinking with me?”

“Besides the fact I told Boss we were going, is that you’ve been avoiding me the past few days and I don’t like it. So we’re going to get, as you say, ‘beved up,’” he crossed his arms.

“I-I don’t think tonight is a g-good night, Ryan, I’ve been uh…uh trying to get, um, better at…?” I tried my best to come up with some excuse, but the look he was giving me surely said that he wasn’t buying it. I sighed and looked up at him.

“What pub do you want to go to, Rye-Bread?” Ryan smirked at me and gave me a business card with a pub that was on the other side of town.

“Why do you want to go all the way over there? There’s plenty downtown we could go to!”

“It’s a special place, I like going there. A friend of mine owns it and he usually gives me and the occasional buddy a couple rounds on the house. From what I heard from Mogar, you got pretty wasted. So a few free drinks might catch your interest,” he smirked, raising an eyebrow. I reluctantly gave in.

“Fine, when do you want to meet there? It’s 3 o’clock now, just so you know.”

“Hm,’ he pondered, “I’d say, meet me there at 8:30. It’s actually the kind of place you need an invitation to get in. I’ll make sure the guy at the door has your name. I’m always welcome so don’t worry about having trouble getting in.”

I nodded, I’ve never been to one of those fancy pubs before. And I never knew Ryan had a friend that owned one. He walked away before stopping and looking at me.

“Don’t forget, this isn’t some run-down bar like you, Mogar, and Brown Man go to. Dress semi-decent, at least. See ya tonight,” he waved as he left the shop. I looked at what I was wearing; mostly just really old clothes that I use whenever I do maintenance-type work. Covered in black grease and sweat stains, as well as being faded and torn, I knew I wouldn’t be wearing those. I wouldn’t have anyway.

I spent the rest of my day finishing up work since Ryan was gone. I worked on the cars with what he had taught me and what little I knew, Michael showed me some electrical stuff as he showed me how it all works in the shop, doing my best to pay attention. I shocked myself a few times but I didn’t do too terribly bad.

I wiped sweat from my face, checking my watch. 6:30 P.M. I needed to get back to Geoff’s so I could shower and be ready in time. I said bye to the guys and asked Jack to drop me off since my bike was still at Geoff’s. I called up Geoff before we left though, asking if he could bring me to the pub. I knew I’d get totally wasted again, and I didn’t want my bike being left way up there if Ryan ended up bringing me back. Needless to say, he wasn’t gonna do it, so I decided to just take a cab.

When Jack dropped me off, he smirked and waved bye before leaving. I hurried into the house, going straight into the bathroom and started showering. After a quick but thorough wash, I stood in the bathroom with a towel wrapped around my waist as I groomed myself. Definitely needed a shave, but I didn’t want all of my facial hair gone, so I left a good amount of scruff that didn’t look untidy. As I finished, I went to change, rummaging through my closet for a nice outfit. If it’s as fancy as he said, I really didn’t want to look out of place. Clean purple button down shirt, black jeans, and my favorite pair of sunglasses. I checked the time.

8 P.M.

I cursed at myself, I still haven’t called the cab, it’s a 30 minute drive, and what if the driver is late? I sighed but will do my best to get there on time. I called the cab service, luckily there was a car just under 10 minutes away, at least it wouldn’t be terribly late. I hung up, as I did, I heard Geoff walking around, calling out to me.

“Gavin, where are you going with Ryan tonight?”

“I, uh, don’t remember the name, but a business card Ryan gave me is on the kitchen counter,” I replied. I heard him shuffle into the kitchen and stop.

Suddenly he burst out laughing.

“What the hell is so funny, Geoff!?” I walked out to the walkway near the kitchen as he’s practically hunched over laughing.

“D-dude! Seriously? Gavin, you don’t know that place!? That’s like one of the best strip clubs in town!! I can’t even get in there, despite all my connections. But Ryan of all people knows the owner and you and he are going tonight!? Aw that’s fucking rich!!”

I stood there in shock, I didn’t know that was a strip club. I don’t even really like them to be honest, but that’s where Ryan wanted to go so I guess after tonight I could tell him for next time. I grabbed the card out of Geoff’s hands when the cab got here, I gave the driver the address, but told him to stop a few blocks before. I really don’t need to pull up to a fancy place like that in a bloody cab. I rode in silence the whole way, I sighed when the driver stopped the couple blocks before like I asked. I paid him and got out, checking the time.

8:37 P.M. Christ, I’m already late. I straightened my clothes out, adjusted my sunglasses and headed up the street. I saw a long line but decided to go straight to the door. A large man stopped me, pushing me back slightly.

“Woah there, kid. You think you can cut in front of all our customers like that?” I heard some angry yells in my direction, but I just sighed, irritated.

“Yeah, I was invited here tonight by a friend but I’m already running late.” The guy gave me an unconvinced glance.

“What’s your name, kid?”

“Gavin Free, and I ain’t a bloody kid.”

He looked at a few papers he had with him, his eyes widening before looking back at me.

“I’m so sorry, Mr. Free, I hadn’t known Mr. Haywood was having a guest tonight. Please forgive me, and I’ll have a guy escort you to the room. There’s a note that you haven’t been here before.”

I had a blank look on my face, was Ryan that popular around here? No wonder he avoids jobs that are all the way up here. A second guy came out and motioned me in, I followed him into the building. Flashing lights and loud music filled my senses. I practically tasted the alcohol in the air, I followed close, this place was huge. We weaved past wealthy looking men and more than a dozen women walking around in panties and bras, a few up on the dance floor as they showed off their bodies for the men. All the way in the back was a door, we went in to find a small hallway. And even then we walked to the very last door, he knocked a couple times and waited for a response. I barely heard Ryan over the music as he responded and the worker opened the door for me. I stepped in and he shut it behind me and we were surrounded in near silence. The room was proofed pretty well against the music of the club, though you didn’t have to strain to hear it, it was just more comfortable to listen to.

I looked at Ryan, and it wasn’t what I was expecting.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get a little hot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got some notes at the end of this chapter, if you don't want a mild spoiler, don't read it until after reading this chapter. Or do if you want. :P
> 
> Also, longer chapter because of mild smut! :D

Honestly I had no idea what to expect actually. Ryan sat on the large couch in the room, dressed in a slimming white suit with a pale blue button down shirt under the suits coat. He sat there relaxed, legs crossed with a glass of what looked like whisky in hand. I had never seen so well groomed before: his hair was combed, looking lighter in color from the lack of dirt and grease from being at our shop, his facial hair was trimmed near clean shaven, the faint green color of the room made it seem that his blue eyes were shining brighter than I’ve ever seen before. The white suit he was wearing was really smooth looking, I didn’t see a single fold that looked out of place.

He might as well have looked like a king. I could have just stared at him if it not were the two women sitting next to him. I fought the blush threatening to show, clearing my throat, Ryan smiled at me, raising an eyebrow as he took a drink of his whiskey.

“Hello, Gavin. You’re late, you know.”

“Uh, s-sorry Rye-Bread…I was running late and my cab didn’t show up on time, plus I was stopped at the door…” I muttered out my flimsy excuse. I looked up to see those two women on either side of him pressed up against his sides, their hands resting delicately on his chest as they rest their heads on his shoulders. I looked away, holding in an uncomfortable sigh, and then sat down in a chair, not even sitting on the same large couch in the room. He looked over at me.

“So what would you like to drink? The small counter over there has some drinks behind it, “he paused looking at one of the girls, “Would you be a dear and get our guest a drink of his choosing?” he purred at her. She smiled and pulled away.

“Of course, Mr. Haywood, I would love to,” she replied in a forced sweet manner as he stood. I didn’t look her way as she walked away, just looking at Ryan. He leaned forward, uncrossing his legs, wordlessly moving the other woman off him. He looked over at me, giving me a weird glance.

“Are you alright, Gavin? I know you haven’t been here before but I thought you’d still be okay coming here. And why are you so far away from us, come over here! What would you like to drink?”

I nodded, not wanting to refuse his offer, sitting next to him on the couch, leaving enough space between us if that stripper wanted her seat next to him, but he gave me his signature smirk and eyebrow raise and slid over closer to me, forgetting the second woman, crossing his legs again.

“I-I uh….I’ve never heard of this place before, so when Geoff asked wh-where I was going and I told him…h-he um, told me himself after laughing at me that this w-was a strip club o-or something…Also, just a beer would be fine.”

I heard the girl on the other side of Ryan scoff, giving me a look, Ryan nodded though in understanding.

“Ah, I see, well no worries here. You looked like you could use a break and have some fun so I thought I’d mix it up for us. Glad you at least took my advice and dressed more properly.”

I looked down at my clothes and frowned, these were my best looking clothes aside from an actual tuxedo, but they still looked like run down street clothes compared to Ryan’s outfit. Even the strippers laced bra and panties looked to be of better material than my clothes. I’d never seen him so dressed up before, I’m used to him being in that dirty old leather jacket with a plain tee shirt underneath and just baggy jeans and runners. Seeing him all dressed up and groomed as well as he was, I might’ve not even known it was him. The first girl that Ryan spoke to returned with a tall glass of beer, I took it from her with shaky hands but managed to drink it without spilling.

Ryan downed his own glass, giving it back to her, “I’m done with it for now, but get a new glass ready,” he asked if not demanded of her. She only smiled and took the glass.

“Ryan, can we talk?” I managed to get out, he looked a little nervous before holding a hand up.

“That can wait, Gavin. Right now just enjoy yourself, you’ve been in a daze lately, so just relax and enjoy what I put together for you. Allow me to introduce you to my girls. They work here but they only serve drinks. The owner was alright with that because we’re such good friends. He only pays for them serving drinks, and I pay them the rest that the other girls would make. They do learn all the dances though, so they could perform. Anyway, the one that got you a drink was Georgia, and the one sitting behind me is Tasha.”

I sat there, unsure of what to say to the girls, just blushed and said a quick hello to them. Ryan moved back away a bit as I finished my first beer. Georgia took my glass from me and sat it next to Ryan’s, he quirked he eyebrow and grinned at me.

“Well they’re here for a reason Gavin, just relax, they know what they’re doing.”

Before I could comprehend what he had said, let alone question him, Georgia was straddling my lap on the couch, glancing over seeing Tasha moving onto Ryan. I felt jealousy pang in my chest as his hands slid up her thigh, I looked back up at Georgia as she undid some of the buttons of my shirt. My breath hitched as she breathed hotly on my collar bone, her hands guiding mine to rest on her hips. She leaned back and smiled seductively as she gently rolled her shoulders, letting the straps of her top start to slide down as she then moved my hands to her back and up to the straps. I panicked on the inside, I wasn’t really comfortable with this, I don’t even really like women much anymore and I was getting too embarrassed to keep my hands from shaking.

I took a few short breaths before pulling away, not unhooking the straps, shaking my head a couple times.

“Are you okay, Sweetie?” She asked, looking slightly concerned. I nodded but then shook my head, motioning her to get up. She stood with grace, moving aside as I stood up fidgeting with my clothes, taking my sunglasses off, dropping them on the couch while I was pacing a bit as she just sat back down. Ryan heard what happened and also stopped, politely asking Tasha to move before standing up.

“Gavin? What’s the matter, I thought you wanted to have fun?”

“I-I..R-Ryan, th-this isn’t what I’m used to. I’m sorry, I thought we were just gonna have a few bevs at just some local pub. I didn’t know it’d be a fancy place like this with strippers. I-I’m not really comfortable with it, so I-I’m just gonna go…” I turned and headed to the door, Ryan walked quickly up behind me, grabbing my arm.

“Gavin, please hear me out. I thought you’d enjoy this, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. Please stay, the girls can go back to work.”

As if on cue, both girls got up, Ryan pulled me to the side as they left.

“Good night, James. We’ll see you soon!” They both said happily as they left. James? I thought his name was Ryan. Also they and the other guy at the door said “Haywood.” Ryan locked the door after they left, he sighed and looked apologetically at me.

“I’m sorry Gavin, I just…I wanted to impress you so I got all this put together. I didn’t even consider the fact that you wouldn’t like it. Do you want to go somewhere else?” I smiled and shook my head.

“We don’t have to leave, it can still just be us hanging out. But I want to talk to you, okay?” He nodded and while I went to the mini bar in the room, Ryan took off his coat. I looked over as he hung it up, almost dropping the bottle in my hand. For underneath his coat was a tight waist coat. It was white as well, matching the white pants and the pale button down shirt he wore. It looked so tight that he could pop the buttons off it if he flexed enough. Undoing buttons on his sleeves, he rolled them up and sat down at a stool next to the bar as I poured us new cocktail drinks. He thanked me and took a drink.

“Ryan, can I ask you some questions?” I asked boldly, he glanced up and nodded.

“I knew you would have some,” he replied a bit dryly.

“Who are you exactly? First you’re called ‘Mr. Haywood’ and then they called you ‘James.’ I thought your name was Ryan Vagabond. What the bloody hell is all this? You’ve never mentioned any of this.”

“Gavin, do you remember I told you I kept my identity a secret when we’re with the crew? Well part of it was I needed a cover up name just in case. My real name is James Ryan Haywood. I’m from a wealthy family that has…connections. I needed to be involved in something I’m known for so that way when I’m out with you guys, I can be freer. And if I have to have a different name to do so then fine. I know you’re not really used to seeing me all dressed up but I needed to be for here.”

“Ryan…I just…why don’t you tell the others?”

“Same reason when you asked about why I can get self-conscious about wearing my mask. Not only am I protecting my family, it’s for myself. My family is one of the biggest families that deals with economics. If word got out that I was a criminal in a gang, The Fake AH Crew none the less, we’d all be in danger.”

This was definitely a lot to take in. The Haywood family, huh? I had heard about them but I wasn’t invested enough in economics and whatever “connections” he was walking about to truly understand. I didn’t continue the conversation, instead, I made us a few more drinks. We also had whisky and a bunch of other drinks. We quickly were both wasted, telling each other stupid stories that we’d both probably forget. He held his liquor pretty well and was still mostly stable. Me, not so much, I was wobbling everywhere and he was cautious with me a bit. I tripped when I decided to sit next to him instead of standing and drinking, he caught me, sloppily, but he caught me. I clutched onto him tightly, burrowing my face into his chest, inhaling his scent. I groaned as I finally got to smell him so up close. It was more than I could’ve ever imagined, and I just loved this feeling.

“Gavin, you alright?” he asked, slurred a bit.

“’s not’n, Ry-Rye…jus’ tha’ ‘ve always l-liked you..” I grinned at him as he sat me down. He looked at me curiously.

“What do you mean by ‘always,’ Gavin?”

“W-well I-I mean jus’ for a few months, ya know? After w-we started…uh…hangin’ out and shit. Ne’r knew y-you was so pretty lookin’ Ry.” He studied me before smirking, leaning forward, his mouth to my ear.

“How much to you like me, Gav?” he purred. I shuddered a bit as he pulled away, I looked at him with a drunken haze. Without so much as a thought, I grabbed onto him, his waist coat in my fists as I pulled us together, kissing him hard. His mouth felt perfect. I may be smashed with booze, but I knew I wanted this feeling. His hand moved up, tangling it in my hair, I groaned against him, trying to pull him closer, instead he pulled me into his lap, his mouth moving against my jaw down to my neck. I felt his heavy breathing as I felt his tongue on my collar bone. I moaned, grabbing onto his clothes tighter, pulling him closer still. I bit my lip as I ground my hips against his, I heard him grunt and move his hand from my hair, grabbing hold of my ass as he lifted me up. I wrapped my legs around him as he stumbled a bit to the couch, dropping both of us onto it. Kneeling above me, he was panting a bit and he smiled a bit, his hair a mess.

“Don’t worry, we won’t do anything more than this…We’re both drunk and I don’t want to do anything like that while we’re this intoxicated…” Ryan said softly, I smiled up at him, pulling him down, and locking our lips together once more.

Eventually we ended up on our sides in each other’s arms, my back was pressed against his chest as we just lay there. One of his arms was draped over my waist, I heard him humming a bit, I took hold of his hand, intertwining my fingers with his. Soon the alcohol claimed us both, the muffled music drowned out as we both fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, honestly, that was terrible ending on chapter 5. A couple of you thought Ryan was the stripper. Sorry that he wasn't, but that gave me an interesting idea for in the future.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Violence, blood. Just so you know.
> 
> Things get heated! What will happen!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll put warnings for violence and stuff like that because I know people would appreciate it, but keep in mind that this is a gang!au so violence and blood is going to happen so please don't get too upset if I forget to mention! I'll do my best but I'm only human so I may forget!

The next morning, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t confused on why I still in the club. I would also be lying if I said I wasn’t comfortable, especially with Ryan’s arms wrapped tightly around me. My head throbbed, I was dizzy just being where I was, so I thought it would be best to not get up at all. Not that I’d want to.

I gently placed my hand on Ryan’s as he slept soundly, a soft snore filling the room. I did my best to move softly enough to turn around in his arms so I could face him. As I settled, I looked at him in a way I couldn’t before. He kept such a hard look whenever he was with us, to see him so relaxed and to see him with such soft features was like looking into the other life he lived. I could remember him telling me his back story. He must’ve trusted me so much to tell me all that he did. I’m pretty sure even Geoff doesn’t know. Geoff would want in on the money that Ryan had access to. I smiled when Ryan sighed in his sleep, his hair everywhere. He looked so peaceful.

I thought back to last night, our conversation throughout the night as we drank. I enjoyed my time with Ryan, I relaxed more on the couch we were on and closed my eyes. Ryan’s grip around my wait tightened as I tried to fall back asleep until he woke up.

As I relaxed into his arms, flashbacks came to me. I could remember the feeling of his mouth on mine, the way he trailed down my neck to my collar bone. I remembered how I clung onto him, pulling him close as I grinded against him to him lifting me up and bringing us to where we are now.

No way, there’s no way that happened. Not last night. Not with my friend.

I fought the memories so I wouldn’t get a hard on already, but to help with it, I pressed myself against Ryan more. I inhaled his musk scent, it was nearly intoxicating. Staying pressed against him, I fell back asleep.

Sometime later, someone was shaking my shoulder. It surely wasn’t gentle either. I opened my eyes, the first thing I noticed was that Ryan wasn’t lying next to me anymore, and when I looked up, he was the one shaking me. I felt my body run cold as my heart dropped into my stomach, his face scrunched up in an angry glare. When our eyes met, he took hold of my arm and yanked me up.

“What the hell, Ryan!? What are you being such a prick for? What did I do??” I cried, grabbing hold of his collar, pulling him down to eye level. I may be shorter, but I never let height get in my way, same if someone is stronger. He was both, but I wouldn’t let that stop me from fighting him. I did my very best to fight the tightness in my chest. We were having so much fun last night, and I’m not even talking about our making out towards the end, just each other’s company, he was such a joy to be around, why is he acting like this?

“You think I’m just gonna let you walk in my club, get me all boozed up just so you can get some dirt on me? And the name is Haywood. James Haywood,” his voice boomed in anger, he shoved me back, I lost my grip and tripped, falling down and smashing through a small table. Glass shattered all around me, I groaned and looked up, realizing it wasn’t just us in here. Other men that worked here surrounded us, but mostly me, I looked at Ryan with pleading eyes. He didn’t so much as flinch.

“Ry-I mean…James. I don’t know what the bloody hell you’re talking about! Why would I need dirt on you? I thought we were friends! And last night-!”

“Shut the fuck up! I know who you are. Gavino “Vav” Free. You with the Fake AH Crew, aren’t you? You and your scumbag crew always causing problems up in Los Santos. Vinewood doesn’t need your shit crew up here. And as for last night? Please…I’ve only known you for a few days. I brought you here in good faith, thinking a couple friends could enjoy some drinks and my gals. But no, you get me drunk and try to get some gold for you and your little street gang. Thought filming us last night would get you enough black mail to get in on my inheritance. But unfortunately for you, I found the camera this morning.”

He lifted up a tiny camera. Wait, that was one of ours for our jobs. What the hell is he doing!? I couldn’t break my eyes from his. The anger boring into me, even the feeling of glass sticking into my skin wasn’t enough to get me to look away.

“Ryan…James…whoever the hell you are…I just..I just wanted to be your friend. I didn’t plan for any of this!” I whimpered. With the pain of falling through a table and glass, as well as every hurtful thing he was saying, it took every drop of energy to not give in and let myself crumble, I wouldn’t cry, not even a single tear.

“Ha! Be my ‘friend?’ How long did you think your little game was gonna go on? Couple months? A year? Just long enough to get the right amount of video footage and black mail me, right?” he smirked. I’ve seen him smirk plenty of times, but this? This smirk was not like one I’d ever seen before, it was so sinister I nearly shuddered.

“Boys, take him out back. It’s time to take the trash out anyway.” He chuckled darkly, “So sorry your little plan didn’t work out, Vav. Maybe next time, you won’t try to go after the Haywood family.” He smiled that dark grin as I was lifted from the debris on the floor. They dragged me out and all I could do was look heart brokenly at Ryan as he turned his back to me.

The men opened the back door where the dumpsters were and threw me out onto the ground. I groaned as they all laughed and insulted me. I struggled to stand and when I did, they kicked me down.

“I don’t know guys, I think Mr. Haywood is letting this one off too easy,” one commented.

“Yeah, you’re right. Mr. Haywood shouldn’t have to worry about this, so why don’t we teach him another lesson just to make sure he understands?” another spoke. I coughed and sputtered as one would pick me up and he and another would hold me up as a third would punch and kick me wherever he could. A fourth would be behind me, kicking me behind the knees so I would collapse. Only to have it go on and on.

“If this is one of the Fake AH Crew’s best, then this city is actually not in that much danger,” one laughed. I should know better that to speak, but it’s just how I am.

“Actually, I’m not the best. I’m the worst…But once Grif finds out, you guys are in for a world of hurt,” I scoffed, which earned me several angry gut punches and kicks. I coughed and blood sputtered from my mouth. I gasped for air as it continued until it went black.

*~*~*~*

I woke up in an alleyway. They must’ve thought it’d be easier to just leave me here instead of behind the club. I stood on shaky legs, everything hurt, as I moved I could feel the healing gashes from the glass start pulling back open. I managed to get to the street so I could see where I was.

I was back in Los Santos. They must’ve driven here to leave me. Certainly to get me out of Vinewood. I felt my pockets, my wallet was gone but I had my phone. It was dead so it was of no use. I figured the shop would be closer to walk to than back home. I kept my head hung low as I practically shuffled back. When I arrived, I noticed Ryan’s bike was gone. Well, it’s not like I was expecting to see him here. I pushed the door open, allowing myself to collapse with a hard thud on the ground. I heard shuffling around me. I looked up as Jack and Geoff lifted me up and onto the couch. Both calling my name.

“Gavin, what the fuck happened to you?” Geoff demanded as Jack went and got medical supplies, “You’ve been gone nearly all day! You were hanging out with Ryan last night! Where’d you go today!? He came by asking if you were here an hour ago but we told him you never showed. And beforehand he was at our place. We decided to check to see if you were here. When you weren’t, he took off!”

I groaned in pain as I shifted to sit up when Jack came back with the stuff, looked at Geoff with tired eyes.

“I didn’t have any cash so I couldn’t call a cab, Ryan was gone so I just wrote a note and left. I was walking back and got jumped by some guys in a gang. They knocked me out and left me. I woke back up and came right here…” I hissed as Jack treated my wounds, cleaning them out and stitching me up. Geoff studied me before seeing I didn’t feel like talking anymore. He left Jack to finish taking care of me, and then made me lie down and rest. The pain radiating through my body was the unwelcomed lullaby I needed to fall asleep once again.

Hours passed as I woke to talk on the other side of the room, I glanced at the window and saw the night sky. I didn’t realize I was here for so long. As I came to, I could make out the voices. It was Geoff, and he was talking to…

Ryan.

My chest clamped up. Both physical and emotional pain. I stayed still as I listened to them.

“I don’t know what more you want me to say Ryan. All Gav said was after he left you a note that he was leaving, he was jumped and beaten to a pulp. I’m assuming when he said they left him that they threw him into an alley from how dirty he was. Plus to keep him out of sight from the cops. He didn’t mention anything else about you. He didn’t mention anything going wrong so I’m assuming he enjoyed himself. You make the kid happy, I don’t know why, you’re one of the creepiest motherfuckers around, Rye. He’s still resting now, just so you know.”

“I won’t wake him, I just wanna see him,” he replied dryly. I froze, I needed to get away. The window was open, and glancing over I could see they were distracted still. I carefully stood, feeling my weak muscles scream in protest as I climbed through. I landed quietly and quickly took off, running at least down a block or too before slowing, wheezing painfully hard. I then noticed that I was wearing Geoff’s jacket. Probably to keep me warm while on the couch. I zipped it up tight and pulled the hood up, and at my own slow pace, walked back home where I left his jacket in his room, changing into sleepwear after locking my bedroom door, promptly falling asleep.

*~*~*~*

It has been about a week since I’ve seen Ryan. I actually had spent more time at the shop with everyone. It wasn’t to make sure I saw Ryan, it was actually so I wouldn’t do anything if he were there. I heard him walk in in the late afternoon. The time we’ve spent together got me used to hearing how he walked, so when I heard those familiar footsteps, my body almost went numb with anger.

I was cleaning the guns when he had walked in, but I was out of sight from the door where I was seated. The only other one here was Jack, so when Ryan went to talk to him, he was like I’d always seen him before that night. Back in his dirty leather jacket, jeans and that stupid mask he wore. I glanced over my shoulder as they talked. I heard Jack mention I was here, and when they finished talking, I turned back to my work as Ryan faced me, doing my best to ignore him.

The anger and betrayal boiled inside, I was putting my pistol back together as he approached. I loaded my gun with a clip as he placed his hand on my shoulder.

“Gavin? Can we-“ He didn’t finish his question as I quickly moved, shoving him against the wall, my arm against his neck as my other hand had my pistol pressed under his chin, I ignored Jack’s shouts at Ryan and I just stared at each other. He seemed surprised but also not, like he expected it. I couldn’t tell his emotion, but I didn’t care, I just glared at him, my jaw tight.

“I don’t know who you think you’re fooling Ryan,” I hissed, “or James, should I say? I’m saying this now because it’s the only time I’m saying it. Cross me at all, and you’re as good as dead. You know as well as anyone that I never miss a shot. I don’t know why I expected more out of you.”

I kept my voice low, so Jack wouldn’t hear. I let Ryan go and he just stood there as I put my gun away. I didn’t break eye contact until leaving the building. I don’t know what’s gonna happen in this crew now, but I won’t let this cause problems. Not when I’ve worked hard to be here. No one is going to jeopardize that.

Not even James Ryan Haywood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I recently hit 100 followers on Tumblr! To celebrate I want to draw something based on this fan fic! Have any ideas? Drop me an ask on my Tumblr! (nattiebug14) or leave a comment! I might draw one, I might draw them all! I just need ideas!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do Ryan and Gavin talk? Do they fight?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a shorter chapter, but I found it fitting and trying to make it longer would actually be just filler and such.

The days have been dragging on lately. Whenever Ryan and I are in the same room, the air gets thick with tension. It seems that the others can feel it as well but choose to ignore it. Except for Geoff, he hasn’t been pleased with us and our conflict ever since Jack told him about what happened between us. I haven’t told him anything though, despite him demanding the truth from me.

I don’t know why I kept Ryan’s secret during these few days. Maybe despite how angry he makes me, the fact he had trusted me with it kept my mouth shut. I sighed heavily, glancing around the room. Michael was sitting next to me, having a few beers with me, Ray and Jack were out, Geoff was counting our money, and Ryan was working on our tools. After finishing a couple more beers, Michael was drunk and just lounging about, I stood and stretched.

“Geoff, I’m going out for a walk. Been cooped up all day and could use the air,” I called. He huffed a response and I walked out. As I walked away from the building, I reached into my pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes, pulling out one and putting the pack away. I lit up and took a drag of it, breathing out and then actually starting my walk. I sighed, I haven’t smoked in such a long time and I’ve definitely been drinking more. I know it’s because of how hurt I’ve been, I’ll admit it. I just wish I could forget about it all and continue like we did before that night. As I was walking, I heard someone behind me. I couldn’t really tell if it was anyone I knew. I quickened my pace a bit, hoping to keep my distance. The last thing I needed was a fight.

I heard the strangers footsteps quicken as well, I cursed mentally; this prick was looking for a fight. I dropped my cigarette and took off, hearing him behind me. I rounded a corner and took off down an alley, ducking behind a dumpster. I pulled out my pistol, screwing on a silencer. I sat there crouched, my gun ready. I heard whoever it was slowly walking down the alley, their footsteps treading with caution. I listened closely as he approached, as he drew closer, I jumped out, pointing my gun right at his head.

“Alright, only chance, who are you and why are you following me? I don’t like being followed,” I growled, the figure draped in shadows. He said nothing, just raising his hands to show he was unarmed. He carefully walked forwards, I moved back as he did, watching as he slowly revealed himself. My eyes widened a bit as a familiar leather jacket became visible, followed by its masked owner. My eyes narrowed, not lowering my gun.

“Why are you following me? Did you not understand me before? Cross me and you’re dead,” I said through gritted teeth. I could see his eyes, he seemed relaxed, and it only made me angrier.

“Gavin, please listen to me. You don’t understand what happened…” he pulled his mask off, letting his dirty blonde hair fall.

He stepped forward but I wasn’t having it, without looking away, I aimed my gun to the ground and shot at his feet. He jumped back, looking at me wide-eyed as I lifted it back up at him.

“I don’t want to hear anything you want to say, Ryan. You kicked me out! We were having a good time! All the jokes and the conversations we shared, the drinks we had together…I thought you were my friend,” I hissed.

He frowned, looking down, but I wasn’t done.

“I had a great time, I was so nervous because we never hung out before aside at the shop. But I had fun! But the next morning you’re throwing your title around, throwing me out, and your guys beat the shit outta me! Thought I needed to ‘learn a lesson’ so they beat me to unconsciousness and dumped me in an alley! And you expect me to believe that it was a big fucking misunderstanding!?”

His head snapped up at the mention at his men, genuinely looking shocked and hurt, and flinch at my cursing. He knew I never said that so he knew I was beyond just upset. He nodded, keeping his arms up as he came closer. My arms shook but I didn’t do anything, I couldn’t tell if I was too scared of too upset to stop him. He didn’t try to lower my arm though, letting me stay in control.

“Gavin, please, I’m sorry. They weren’t supposed to hurt you…just let you go outside and I was gonna see you at Geoff’s to talk to you. When you weren’t there and you never showed up at the shop I panicked. I took off and searched the city for you, I got a call from Geoff that you came back injured. I went to see you to make sure you were okay. But you disappeared somehow…I figured you needed a break so…so I stayed away from you. Until I actually decided to come see you. Then everything went south when you held your gun to me…please. I’m so sorry.”

“How should I believe that? You lied to me. Hell, you’ve lied to all of us since the very beginning! I didn’t even know your real name! You’re some big punk up in Vinewood and you pose as some thug in a gang! Why…with all of that, would you be here? Why the Fake AH Crew?”

He frowned, “Gavin, that’s my business for another time…right now, you’re my business.”

I glared at that response, he noticed my anger and continued further.

“Please, just…let me make it up to you somehow. I said all that because someone picked the door lock open. A guy that works there. He saw us sleeping on the couch, the way I held you to me. I was awake holding you, watching you. He walked in and I panicked, I got up and had to say something quick. He went to get security but I said just to get my guys. While he was gone I grabbed one of our cameras. I made up that whole thing because I needed James Haywood to keep his reputation. I didn’t know you’d fall into the table and I didn’t know they beat you up. You weren’t supposed to get hurt at all, I was gonna explain it all to you, but obviously, it didn’t go as planned…”

I was confused, the way he explained everything to me. I thought about how he dressed that night, and can only picture him holding me close as he watched me sleep. My hand holding the gun up quivered, my breath shaking a bit. Was this really true? I couldn’t let him hurt me again, not like that. Not ever. I shook my head at him.

“You’re lying, Ryan. You always lied. You lied to us all!” I shouted.

“And so are you,” he replied calmly.

“What do you mean?”

“Well I can tell you haven’t told Geoff or anyone else for that matter who I really am. You must trust me in some way that you would keep my secret still.”

I sighed, he was right. I couldn’t deny it when I obviously kept his secret.

“I don’t care, Ryan. I could still tell them and I still want to bloody shoot you because of all this!” I growled.

He smirked, and not the sinister looking one from before, but the friendly, gentle one I’ve grown to adore. He walked up, grapping my hand that help my gun and lifted it up under his chin, grinning at my terrified face.

“If you’re gonna kill me, then here’s your chance. If not, let me try to make it up to you. Please Gavin. But this is up to you.”

I just stood there, he let my hand go, leaving it against him. My whole body trembled, I couldn’t do it, I never could…I lowered my arm. But in my frustration, I looked down, pointed my gun at the wall and emptied the clip into it. Even after it was empty, I kept pulling the trigger as I aimed at the wall, a mix of emotions flowing through me: anger, betrayal, sadness, grief, relief, confusion, and more. I stood there shaking, squeezing my eyes shut as I stopped trying to shoot my gun. My loosened grip letting it fall to the ground.

I just stood there in front of him, defeated. I looked up at him with tired eyes. Tired of the fighting, the anger, and worst of all, the guilt of thinking I could actually take his life. His face softened, and his smile turned into a frown. A frown of compassion and understanding. He stepped forward, hugging me gently as I just stood there, not sure how to react.

“I’ll make it up to you, Gavin. I promise,” he whispered.

He let me go and turned away, starting to pull his mask back on.

“How?” I asked.

He looked at me over his shoulder, meeting my eyes. He didn’t answer, he just smiled and pulled his mask down before walking away. Leaving me to stand there in my thoughts.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So basically the chapters before was really to I guess establish their relationship/get it started, but this is the start of the real story. Hope you stick along for the ride! The chapters might get longer but we'll see. I hope you enjoy it!

_This can’t be happening. Not now, not after working so hard to get past this. I stood there, my legs shaking as I lost the ability to stand, landing on my knees. My whole by was numb, all I could do was look down at the gun in my hands._

_Why?_

_Why did this happen? I didn’t want this to happen! Of all times, of all people…I can’t even finish my thoughts. Tears ran down my face and onto the gun. Only then did I notice the blood on the gun. And the blood on myself as well. I couldn’t look at it anymore, I threw the gun as far away as I could. I looked back, seeing what I had done. I weakly shifted on my hands and knees, crawling towards something. Something I wish I never had to crawl to. When I approached, I chocked on a sob, it wasn’t just something, it was someone._

_And not just anyone. It was Ryan. My Ryan. My past was catching up to me. He tried to save me and was held hostage, a gun pressed to his temple. I aimed at the one holding him, I was as confident as I always was, I knew I could save him._

_But when I fired the gun, I missed. The one and only time I missed a shot, was the same one that went right through Ryan’s forehead._

_The figures of my past left, leaving me and dropping Ryan’s body. I sobbed over him, his eyes open and wide with shock. I couldn’t look at him, not those dull blue eyes anymore. I placed my hand over his eyes, closing them. I collapsed on his chest and just cried, cried like I never have before._

_Ryan was dead. And I shot him._

*~*~*~*

My eyes shot open and I bolted awake. My heart was racing, I was covered in sweat, and when I checked, I was crying. I looked at my hands, they trembled at the flashbacks to the nightmare, blood covering them for clinging onto Ryan’s body. I leaned forward, holding myself I chocked on quiet sobs. How could I have a dream like that? No, Ryan isn’t dead, he isn’t going to die. I’ll make sure of that.

The figures in my dreams also shook me a bit. I haven’t thought about them, let alone dreamt about them in years. Maybe it was just for the sake of torturing me more in the nightmare. A shudder ran down my spine at the haunting images. I rubbed my face with my hands before standing up. I dragged myself into the bathroom, starting a hot shower then slipping in. I stood there as the hot water nearly burned my skin, still unsure of how I should handle what has happened recently. I thought about Ryan’s explanation for everything. Could I really trust him? Just the way he looked so shocked when I told him it was his men that beat me…and how he hadn’t meant to shove me hard enough for me to trip and break the table. Maybe he was telling the truth.

He actually walked into my gun, pointed it up under his chin with his own hands on mine. He was confident, I’ll give him that. I wonder how he felt when I pulled it away but emptied my clip into the wall next to us. I washed myself and got out, my skin red from the heat, I went into my room and got dressed, meeting Geoff in his ride.

“So, have you and Ryan figured your shit out? All this nonsense is causing me problems,” Geoff grumbled when I told him that we finally talked.

“Maybe. We talked last night, we’ll see where it takes us. I’m hoping for the best, but there’s no definite on the situation,” I replied.

“Gavin, why won’t you tell me what’s going on between you two? You used to talk to me about everything. But ever since that night, or the next day when you finally came back I should say, you haven’t really spoken to anyone. Then the week later you hold him at gun point! I worked too hard to get this crew started and I know how hard you worked to be here after we had met, but putting each other into danger like that isn’t gonna fly by me. I almost considered kicking you both out. But I didn’t, because I hope you guys can work this shit out. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, sir. I understand. We’ll figure it out, I promise…but I can’t tell you what happened. I just can’t. I owe him that much.”

Geoff looked at me, nodding a moment later, “I can respect that, Gav. Just know that if things don’t work out the way you want, you guys can still be a good team, good partners if you try. And maybe you could be friends again. I want you to be happy, alright? Don’t worry so much,”

I looked over at him as we drove, he usually doesn’t talk like that. Maybe he has confidence that we can work out our issues. I nodded and looked out the window until we got to the hang out. I got out and went in, my thoughts surrounding Ryan but knew I need to look at our cars, since Ryan taught me so much. I went into the garage, starting working on checking the oil. The oil needed changing so I hitched one of the cars up on a jack and got all my supplies. I kneeled down and crawled under it, laying on my back as I examined the bottom of the car. I heard the door to the garage open from the main room, hearing familiar footsteps. He strolled over and kneeled down, looking under at me.

“Hey there, Gav,” Ryan greeted, “is it okay if we talk?”

I didn’t really say anything, just nodded and crawled back out. Ryan held out his hand to help me up, I looked at it before hesitantly taking it, letting him pull me up.

“Gavin, are you doing alright? I didn’t want to keep you last night because I know you had a lot to think about. I’m so sorry-“

“Please stop apologizing…it is a lot to go through but apologizing all the time won’t make it easier.”

“Oh, I see. I won’t apologize all the time, but can we still talk?” he asked cautiously. I smiled a bit and nodded.

“Yeah, it’s alright. I don’t mind,” I smiled at him softly, “I just want to know something.”

“What do you want to know, Gav?” he smiled softly.

“That night at the club, I know we already talked about how we enjoyed each other’s company and shit. But after we actually started drinking and…after…h-how do you really feel? I just need to know, Rye-Bread, I’m going to go absolutely mental if I don’t!”

Ryan smiled at me, “I feel what you feel, Gavin. I enjoyed your company so much. And like I said last night, I didn’t move when I woke up that next morning, I held you and watched you. That was the greatest feeling ever.”

I stared at him, feeling a knot in my chest when he said that. Moving forward without breaking eye contact, I grabbed hold of his jacket, pulling him down, connecting our mouths. It felt just as comforting as the first time. I clutched onto him, feeling him against me. His arms snaked around my waist, pulling us together, his head tilted off to the side a bit, his tongue exploring my mouth. I hummed in response, my grip tightening on his jacket. He grunted in response, bringing a hand up, his fingers making their way in my hair, right on the back of my neck, pulling me close. I pulled away, gasping for air. I looked up at him, my eyes wide. He took a few deep breaths, looking down at me.

He grabbed hold of my wrist, pulling me to the work bench, shoving things away. He pulled me close, lifting me onto it. Even sitting up on it, he still was at my level, possibly still a bit taller still. He unzipped his jacket, shrugging out of it. I looked at his torso, seeing his shirt hug his muscles, I bit my lip in anticipation. His jacket fell to the floor, forgetting it and pulling me in for another kiss. Our mouths moved together in perfect harmony, until Ryan pulled away just enough to move down to my neck. He tugged down my shirts collar, attaching his mouth to my neck once again, just like last time. I groaned softly as he did, gasping when he bit down on my neck. I groaned, leaning into it, urging him on. He bit more, and sucking my skin as well, my arms grabbing onto his back. My head hanging back, wordlessly begging for more with heavy breaths.

He pulled away, shifting me back, climbing on himself. He gently pushed me to lay under him as he positioned himself over me. He leaned down, connection our lips once more. As he did, his weight shifted to his legs as he lifted his hands, unbuttoning my shirt, pushing it open. He leaned back, panting as he pulled his shirt off, tossing it with his leather jacket and leaning over me again. He gazed down at me, looking me over as I panted heavily. He moved lower, kissing down my neck to my chest. Biting and sucking my skin, leaving marks all over me.

“Ryan…please,” I whispered, he paused momentarily, moving up and kissing me on the lips.

“Say that again,” he murmured against my lips quietly.

“Ryan. Please,” I said again, reaching a hand to his neck, pulling him into a hard kiss, exploring his mouth as well. He held on close as I did so, his hands all over my body. I could feel the heat from every touch, the sensation of him on me. It was so sensational, so intimate. I’d never felt this content before, the way he made me feel, like I could take on the world now.

I felt invincible. I shifted a bit, propping myself up on my arms, not breaking our contact as I pushed him back. As if reading my mind, Ryan moved with me, holding me to him as we turned. My shirt hung loosely from my arms while upright, his legs hanging over the edge as I moved into his lap. He held me close at the waist, burying his face into my neck and chest as he added more marks. Each bite sending shockwaves of pleasure through me. His hands moved all over my torso. All over my back and stomach, touching every bit of skin visible. He pulled away, smirking as he admired his work. I sat in his lap panting, my heart racing and need surging through me.

He took his hands off me, gently cupping my face with them. He smiled, pulling me close as we kissed ever so softly, my eyes drifting shut as his thumbs caressed my cheeks.

“I think…you’ve made it up to me,” I whispered with a soft smile, opening my eyes. He chuckled softly.

“Oh no, Gavin. This is just the beginning. I have a lot to make up for…” he responded quietly before kissing me again gently.

*~*~*~*

After all of that, I shakily buttoned up my shirt as Ryan pulled on his shirt and jacket. He smiled at me, kissing the top of my head, and then pulled his mask on.

“Wanna meet up later, Gavin? Go  get some drinks? You can pick the place this time,” he offered.

“Yeah! That sounds top! I’ll let you know when I think of a place, alright?” I smiled at him, he nodded before leaving the garage.

I decided to get back to what I was going to do. And when I was under the car, letting the old oil spill out into the bucket I had, I heard my phone ring from the bench I left it on. I crawled out from under the car, wiping my hands off before picking it up and looking at who was calling.

“Unknown Caller.”

I hesitantly answered.

“Hello?”

“It’s been a while, Gavino. Hope you’re not causing any trouble down there in Los Santos. Wouldn’t want there to be any problems, right?”

I froze, I know that voice, I just know it.

“Who is this?” I asked cautiously, “How did you get this number? Who are you?”

“Gavin, you know better that to ask me silly questions. You better behave yourself, who knows if I might take a vacation down there. Liberty City is so boring now-a-days.”

“I’m warning you right now,” I growled, “I’m staying in Los Santos. Away from you, away from all of you. I have a new life, a good life. I won’t let you take that away again.”

The man on the phone chuckled, “I see now, you’ve found yourself a new husky male to make you his bitch. You really like whoring yourself out, don’t you?”

“It’s not like that! I-I..”

“Gavin, quit making up excuses. You like being bitch, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I know what you want.”

“You don’t know anything! Leave me alone!” I shouted, and he only chuckled more.

“I don’t think I can do that, I need to make sure you’re alright,” he purred darkly.

“Shut up! I don’t need you in my life anymore! Leave. Me. Alone!” I cried, throwing my phone at the cement wall. My phone shattered into pieces as it fell to the floor. My heart raced and my body trembled; I thought I got away from my life back then.

Is that what my nightmare was telling me? That my past is coming to ruin my life once more? I knew not to take his lightly, especially since it was _him_ that called. I quickly left the garage, muttering something to Ray or Michael about finishing the cars. I just quickly made my way to Geoff’s office, bursting through the door. He was on the phone but saw the urgency and most likely fear on my face, ending the call and asking me what was wrong.

“Geoff, we need to talk. I’m in some serious shit, and I need your help.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secrets revealed and Gavin has to come to terms that his past is coming back.

“What kind of help do you need, Gavin? What kind of mess did you get yourself involved in?” Geoff asked, leaving over his desk with his hands clasped in front of him.

“I’m gonna need everyone’s help in this,” I said bluntly, “I’ll explain it all to all of you, but if I can’t stop them, there’s a chance I won’t be coming back.”

Geoff’s eyes widened at my blunt answer before narrowing then closing all together as he collected his thoughts.

“Well, when you put it like that, I need to make sure everyone is here. But that won’t be for at least a couple hours. If you’re so sure about this, I recommend going to the shooting range. I know you never miss, but honestly with how you burst in here I know you need it. No ifs, ands, or buts about it. You’re going.”

“I understand. I can go right now. It could be a bit relaxing,” I muttered, turning to go.

“You’re not going alone. I can’t go with you since I need to get everyone together and get the group situated. It seems some of our on-going jobs need to be postponed. You’re taking Jack with you, I know you said you’re patching things up with Ryan but until it’s all fixed, I want you focused. Jack is going with you. Plus he’s just as capable of helping should anything go wrong. Ryan will help me gather the others. I’ll let you explain what’s happening. But I want a general run down beforehand so honestly I’m able to keep my cool. I don’t want to lose my head while the others are calmer when it’s usually the other way around.”

I didn’t at all argue with him, I know not to talk back with his tone. I walked out of his office as he picked the phone back up. I walked up to Jack, getting his attention.

“Jack, we have to go. We need to go to the range,” I said sternly. Jack raised an eyebrow but having looked at lack of emotion, he simply complied and got up, leading the way to his car.

“You want to tell me what’s going on, Gavin?” he asked. I shook my head.

“You’ll be informed later, but right now Geoff wants me at the range getting some practice in before he gets the gang all together.”

“But your aim is impeccable. Why do you need practice?”

“Let’s just say, something might be coming and even I am not completely prepared for it,” I said lowly, I could feel his eyes on me then.

“You know, if you ever need anything, we’re all here for you. If even you need to get practice in, well we’ll be ready for one hell of a fight,” he said confidently. I couldn’t help but smile, his always seemed so happy all the time.

When we arrived at the range, I stretched and walked into the building with Jack. It was great that he owned it. All of us could get practice in without anyone getting suspicious, so I waited around as he got everything set up. I heard him holler for me once he was ready, I helped him pull out a bunch of his guns: pistols, shot guns, machine guns, and even some rifles. I know I needed to work on my skills for all the different guns. To help relax, Jack offered to join me so I wouldn’t be the only one shooting. I smiled at him as he set up a bunch of targets. I put the large earmuffs to protect my hearing and took aim with a pistol. I took a moment to take a deep breath and fired. All the targets I hit were a bull’s eye. I smiled confidently as Jack finished his targets.

“You’ve got speed and aim on your side, Gav! Nice job!” He grinned, getting the shot guns ready.

“Thanks, Jack!”

I loaded my shot gun as soon as Jack got the targets ready for another round. I took aim and fired, pushing me back a bit, seeing as I don’t use shot guns that often. My shots hit the targets but most of them weren’t great. I sighed, stopping Jack from getting new ones, telling him I’ll just use the old ones. I reloaded and took aim again, determined to do better. I took a deep breath as I aimed my shot gun again, firing at the targets. They weren’t great hits again. I cursed, putting my gun down, stepping back and pacing a bit while Jack redid the targets once again. He saw how stressed I’d become already and frowned.

“Gavin, it’s alright. Let’s do the other guns to make sure you’re ready and we’ll come back to the shot gun,” he said gently. I looked at him, stress evident in my eyes, he smiled gently and placed a hand on my shoulder.

“Everything will be alright, trust us.”

I nodded, going back up, picking up a machine gun next.

*~*~*~*

It had been a couple hours and the machine gun and rifle practice went fine, all perfect shots; so I returned to practice on the shot gun. I’d only been making slight improvements, and it was completely stressing me out. To the point that I didn’t even notice Jack having stopped shooting with me all together, just watching as I shredded targets with imperfect shots.

As I started reloading once again, I remembered _his_ face. The way he talked to me. Fear snaked up my spine and when I reloaded, I was so livid that I didn’t even aim properly. I lifted my gun and fired aimlessly at the target when I only saw his face. Jack was right behind me then, taking the shot gun from me. He turned me around and looked me right in the eyes.

Fear, anxiety, and more fear. Jack read those emotions and others as well. I turned around and looked at the target, trying to find my last shot. But there wasn’t any new holes in the target. I had missed completely. The fear in me had me so shaken that I missed entirely. My shoulders relaxed in defeat, I moved away, finding a fold up chair to sit on. I sat there and held my head in my hands. Jack standing in front of me, placing a hand on my shoulder.

“It’s that bad, isn’t it? I saw how your body language changed, were you thinking about what we’re meeting up about?”

I nodded, and as if on cue, his phone rang. I went to reach for mine but remembered that I had broken mine earlier. Jack answered, just speaking a couple words before hanging up, looking at me.

“Geoff and the others are ready, we need to head back.”

I nodded, helping him quickly lock down the range again before getting in his car. We drove back in silence, he knew I needed it. When we got back, the others were in an office near Geoff’s, Jack went inside and Geoff pulled me aside before joining the others. I gave him a brief rundown on what exactly was happening. He seemed a bit worried but kept calm before going inside, everyone sitting around. Jack and Michael were talking to each other, Ray sat with his feet up on the table in the room while Ryan was behind everyone, mask on and arms crossed. He came up to me when I came in after Geoff.

“Gav, I’ve been trying to call you, why wouldn’t you answer?” he questioned, I scratched the back of my head.

“Broke my phone,” I replied, he looked like he wanted to ask more but Geoff interrupted us, telling Ryan to go back to where he was. He also called everyone’s attention.

“Alright guys, listen up. We’ve got a big problem. Some big gang from Liberty City might be making their way to Los Santos. We’ve got to gear up and make sure we’re good and stocked. This gang is tough,” he stated. The others looked at Geoff, I stood off to the side but as the others looked at Geoff, they also looked at me.

“Wait, why is a gang from the other side of the country coming here?” Ray asked, I looked up at Geoff as he sighed.

“There’s reason to believe they’re on their way here because they want Gavin.”

“What’d you do, Gavy? Piss off someone on the other side of the country? Man, never thought you had that ability,” Michael laughed. Jack wacked him upside the head, Michael cursing in response.

“Can it, Michael. This is serious shit. Gavin’s life could be in danger!” Geoff growled. I glanced at Ryan and he was as still as a statue. It’s hard to tell what he could be thinking, his eyes were closed too so I was lost on what he could be thinking. Geoff tapped my shoulder.

“I need you to explain the whole story to us, Gavin. Who the fuck are these guys and how you’re involved. We need to know what we’re up against,” Geoff told me, I nodded, looking at the guys.

“When I said I came here from the U.K, that was only a half truth,” I started, “I did come from the U.K. but I didn’t come here. I lived in Liberty City, and lived there for a couple years but one day I ran into some guys and immediately got dragged into the gang life.”

“Who are these guys, Gavin?” Jack asked, I looked at him and looked at the others. I sighed.

“They’re called Cock Bite. Much like us, they’re a relatively small crew and they practically run all of Liberty City. From personal experience they even have such a firm grasp on the big city, they even control some smaller towns around them. I don’t know how many they are now, but when I was there, they were only 3 guys. They could have more now just because they want to expand, but I don’t expect them to be any more than 10. They’ve kept their numbers extremely small for so long, they wouldn’t get too big for any reason.”

“What do they want with you? What’s your relationship to them?” Ryan finally spoke up, his eyes connected to mine.

“Most likely to bring me back to Liberty City. I ran away all those years ago, and to have suddenly called me today is proof that they never stopped looking.”

“They called you? What happened?” Michael pitched in. As I was about to answer, everyone’s phone rang, they all pulled them out. But they all seemed to be text messages.

“Gavin, I think they’ve done more than just look for you,” Geoff said. He went over and looked at the others phones, Ryan looked at me, his eyes showed worry in them. My jaw clenched when he came up to me and showed me his phone, letting me read the message from a restricted number.

“First and only warning: Gavino Free is mine. Get in my way, you’re all dead.”

I squeezed my eyes shut reading that, giving Ryan back his phone.

“Gavin, like I said, they’ve done more than just look for you. They’ve been watching you for a long time if they gotten all our numbers,” Geoff said. All of us looked worried, Ray stood up.

“I’m not gonna let anything happen to the Vav to my X-Ray. We’ll figure out who these guys are and we’ll get them. No one can stop the Fake AH Crew!” Ray grinned at us, I smiled but the mood that he tried to lift went right back down when Geoff’s phone started to ring. He showed me that a restricted number was calling before answering.

“Who is this?” he demanded. After a moment of silence, his scowled angrily, “Touch shit, I don’t know who you think you are, but you’re not laying a hand on Gavin.”

After a few more moments, he growled pulling the phone away from his ear, handing it to me. I took it, putting it up.

“What do you want now?” I growled, hearing his chuckle once more.

“Gavino Free, now why would you go and break your phone? I’ve been trying to call you. I want you to know that I have decided to take a vacation down there. I would love to come visit you. I don’t know why they insist that I’m not going to see you. You of all people know that I will.”

I glared at the floor, everyone around me could feel my mood darkening as I talked to him.

“You’re not coming anywhere near me. I don’t care how long you’ve been following me, I’ve been getting better. And I’ll keep getting better, and if you come anywhere near me, I’ll kill you myself,” I hissed. The others looked at each other at my tone, I assumed they know just how truly serious this is. And Ryan kept his eyes locked with mine the whole time.

“Well then Gavin,” he replied, “I guess I’ll just have to teach all of your friends a lesson then. Especially whoever you’re whoring yourself out to.”

“You come near ANY of them, I’ll hunt you down.”

After a pause, I heard another chuckle before he asked me to actually put the cell phone on speaker, I sighed and did as he asked, holding it out so everyone can hear.

“Go ahead, bastard,” I said crudely.

“Good to know you still follow orders, Gavin,” he said simply, “though I don’t like that tone of voice you use with me. But we can talk about that later once you get a new phone. Anyway, I have something to say to everyone else. I want you to know that Gavin belongs to me, and whoever he seems to be whoring himself out to better back off. He’s my property. He’s mine.”

The way he said that I was his made me cringe. Ryan moved forward a bit, stepping closer.

“Gavin doesn’t belong to you or anyone. He’s his own person, so you better back off,” Ryan said. I looked up at him, seeing a smile in his eyes.

“Oh no, you’re wrong, Ryan Vagabond. Gavin is mine and I’m coming to Los Santos to claim back my property. He’s been lost for so many years so I’m taking him back to get him nice and cleaned up to return to Liberty City,” he laughed, “I’ll see you soon, Gavin. You better be ready.”

He hung up after that. I wordlessly handed Geoff back his phone. I let out a deep breath, trembling before collapsing to my knees. Ray and Michael were at my side, lifting me up and sitting me in a chair. Everyone was silent though, all looking at each other before Geoff asked me who was speaking to us on the phone.

“H-he goes by the name Church…but his name is Burnie Burns. He started the Cock Bites and I’m sure he’s still leading the Crew. He’s the one that found me and dragged me in. And he is determined. The first time I ran away, I went back to the U.K. He followed me and found me, dragged me right back before I ran again and came here. He won’t stop until he has me. Which is why I need your help. I have a feeling that if he gets me, he won’t actually bring me back to Liberty City, he’ll more than likely kill me.”

Geoff looked at me before addressing the others.

“If it’s a war they want, it’s a war they’re gonna get. They aren’t gonna touch Gavin.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that the name "Cock Bite" is all that I could come up with. Talk about being unoriginal haha.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin and Ryan spend some quality time together. But will a night out having fun cost Gavin everything?

It has been a very unsettling few days after the meeting, it almost as if everyone was worried that the moment I was out of sight for a moment, that I would be gone. To the point where I went into the garage to find something I’ve misplaced, that Michael or Ray usually burst in to find me. I can’t blame them though, they don’t know what they’re up against. Ryan has been extremely protective though, he usually keeps me from going on missions, sending others to do so while he and I stay back. I’ve argued with him multiple times about it, and he admits he’s taking it too seriously but he can’t help it.

Geoff has been making some calls, he thinks we might need the back up and has been trying to reach old contacts but he can’t seem to be finding any willing to help out. Geoff and Jack are really the only ones who haven’t gotten to over the top about it. They both know that I shouldn’t be alone but they don’t panic when I step out of a room, or prevent me from going on jobs. Geoff has even gotten on Ryan about it, telling him that what we’re about to go through isn’t changing my ability to do my work. Ryan was a bit bitter afterwards but we had a long conversation about it. We had been together a lot more, spending more and more time together, it made me feel real secure.

Geoff came up to me one day though, it seems he had remembered what Church had said on the phone.

“Gavin, I need to ask you something. When Church was on the line, he said something about whoever you were ‘whoring’ yourself out to…what did he mean by that?”

I scratched the back of my neck, I couldn’t tell him though, not yet.

“Not sure, Geoff. Church has always been extremely possessive of me for some reason. And any friendship I have that isn’t with him, he likes to proclaim that I whore myself out to get attention. I think it was because I was all alone before he had me, and now after he dragged me in, that I started having actual friendships, that I was being a whore or something stupid like that. He’s always been hungry for power over everything and everyone. I’m no different since he still claims me as his property.”

He nodded, letting the subject drop. I couldn’t tell if he believed me though, he was never an easy read. After a while, Ryan asked if we could go drinking together, I said yes and after telling the others, I got onto his bike and wrapped my arms around his waist as he drove off. We went somewhere that was kind of nice, and found a good seat in the back. As we ordered our drinks, Ryan was looking over the bar, seeing if anyone was looking our way. I decided not to say anything, I know he just wants to make sure we’re okay, so when our drinks arrived, I smiled as we took ours and drank them together. Ryan still occasionally glanced around but otherwise didn’t really seem too distracted by all this.

“Gavin, are you doing alright? I know I’ve been getting a bit…over protective and all but I just, I’m just worried about you. I don’t know what this Church guy wants you for, but I won’t let him get to you,” he stated with a smile, I took a drink of my beer before smiling myself.

“Thanks, Rye-Bread. That means a lot. He’s pretty bad, though I wonder how long he really has been watching me and following me. I’m worried though about how much he really knows about what’s been going on in my life besides just where I live and that I’m in the Fake AH Crew,” I said, taking another drink.

“I see,” Ryan said thoughtfully, “Anyway, I got you something! Here, I didn’t want to get too good of one, otherwise Geoff might get suspicious about where I get my money,” he chuckled, pulling out a small box then handing it to me. I smiled and opened the box, my eyes widened and I looked up at him.

“Really Ryan? You got me a new phone? Thank you so much! I thought I’d have to go without one for a while until I had the money! I see what you mean, getting anything better than this would really cause Geoff to ask where you got the money! I could never afford this so I’ll kinda have to tell him you got it for me,” I smiled. Pulling the phone out I turned it on.

“Oh hey, I got your phone all set up. Got all your old numbers backed up that I knew anyway, so you might still have to get some of your contacts. But it’s all yours,” he said with a smile, “though I’m sure Church will eventually find out you got a new phone. So far I’ve only gotten that one text, but I expect to get more if he gets angrier for some reason. Which reminds me, why is he so determined to get to you? What happened?” he asked.

“I-I uh, I’m not sure. He always had been that way since I met him. Actually, he’s been that way since he started the Cock Bite Crew as far as I know,” my gripped on my beer a bit tighter, “he’s extremely possessive of his property.”

“But you aren’t his property, Gavin,” Ryan said softly, “Why does he keep saying that you are? Why do you say that you are?”

I looked up at him, shocked.

“I didn’t say that I was, Ryan. I just said he’s possessive of his property. He thinks I am, but I know I’m not. Things are really going to get crazy here in Los Santos once they get here. I hope we’re ready. This is not gonna be easy. He followed me back to the U.K. just to get me back, so coming here isn’t gonna be a problem for him,” I sighed, taking a drink of my beer. Ryan only frowned.

“I’m not gonna let him get to you, Gavin. He won’t lay a hand on you. Not him or any of his gang, you’ll be safe,” he gave me a reassuring smile. He motioned for my phone and I gave it to him. He fiddled with it, before holding it out and, of all things, took a picture of himself. I laughed once he had and he chuckled. I went to grab it back, but he held it away.

“Wait! I got another one to do!” He motioned me to lean over a bit and he did the same, snapping a picture of both of us. I couldn’t stop giggling, asking for my phone back but he asked for one more. I complied and leaned in once again, but this time his other hand grabbed hold from the back of my neck, pulling me into an unexpected kiss as he took the photo. I pulled back, my cheeks red with embarrassment as he messed with the phone for a moment. He handed it back and once I had it back, my blush only deepened for he had made the photo of us kissing the wallpaper of the phone. I looked up at him.

“Why would you do that?” I asked as I couldn’t help but giggle, but smiling at the photo of us kissing. He smiled, leaning forward and kissing me again.

“Isn’t that what couples do? Or some stupid shit like that? Make their partner the wall paper?”

“C-couples?” I blushed a bit, I guess I hadn’t really thought us being a couple since the two times we actually made out I was just so happy we were that I didn’t even think we were. He laughed and confirmed, mentioning he had done the same thing. He held up his own phone and somehow he had a really decent picture of me as his own wallpaper.

“When did you get that picture of me, Ryan? I don’t remember you taking it,” I chuckled.

“Oh, yesterday I think. You weren’t paying attention so I took it, I knew I was giving you a new phone so I thought I’d surprise you,” he laughed.

“Ryan, that’s really sweet of you! But I don’t think we should keep these wallpapers. At least right now,” I said with a slight frown, Ryan seemed a bit confused at the notion.

“Why? Do you not want the others to know? It’s fine if you don’t, I can keep this under wraps until this all blows over,” he offered.

“Well, that’s part of it. Geoff had asked me earlier about something that Church had said. The whole ‘whoring myself’ part and I just told him it was because of his possessiveness over me. I do want to tell the others, I just don’t want to right now because of the timing and because I’m worried Burnie will find out. If he does…” I trailed off, not sure how to explain myself. But when I stopped speaking, Ryan seemed to tense up a bit.

“You said that Church was possessive of you, is there something more to it, Gavin?”

Sometimes I hated how smart he was, I didn’t want to deny it but I definitely didn’t want to admit it.

“That’s none of your concern, Ryan. Burnie is just a prick and he’ll find any way to get under someone’s skin. He’s good at that. Knows what to say when to say it just to aggravate you. He doesn’t even need to be near you to get in your head, Jack caught onto that when we were at the range before the meeting. I just remembered talking to him and I went into a panic…I just…I don’t know what I’m gonna do when he’s actually here, if he isn’t already. I know I said I was getting better and would kill him, but all those years I went through with him, I don’t know if I could really do it.”

“Gavin, if you ever need to talk about anything, you know you can talk to me about this. I’m here for a reason. I don’t know what all you went through, and I don’t expect you to tell me everything right away, but when you do, just know I’m always here for you. Alright?”

He knew just how to make me smile, I nodded, thanking him and we continued drinking. We were a few bevs in and he just kept staring at me, I blushed and grinned at him as we kept at it. After a couple more beers, we started drinking stronger stuff, I was drunk and already a bit of a mess. Ryan could really hold his liquor well but I could see him swaying a bit in his chair too.

We decided to call it a night, he paid for our drinks and we walked out. Well, he walked out and I stumbled alongside him. It wasn’t too late, so we didn’t want to end our night already. He looked around and smirked, pulling me along with him down the road. I followed him as he dragged me along, until we reached his destination. A motel, it wasn’t a bad one so I wasn’t complaining but I couldn’t help but just stare at him.

“You’re not serious, are you? A bloody motel??” I asked dumbfounded. He looked at me then the motel before laughing.

“Did you think I’d bring you to this dump for that? I’m not into run down motels for such intimate occasions. I’d prefer something with class. I just feel like spending the night with you in my arms again. Would be much more comfortable than that couch last time. Since, you know, we’re both way too drunk to drive.”

I looked away, crossing my arms, he could be so bold at times. But I still let him lead me inside as we got a room. I closed the door behind us and when I turned around he was all over me. His mouth attached to mine, his hands in my hair as his tongue searched my mouth once more. I grabbed onto the front of his jacket, reaching up to grasp the zipper, pulling it down. When it was unzipped, he kept his body pressed up against mine as he removed his hands, shrugging out of it. He then unbuttoned my top, pushing it over my shoulders and off completely, leaving me in just a white tank top. I wrapped my arms around his neck, his hands on my waist. I felt him let them slide forward until finding the front of my pants, tugging at them before pulling the belt loose.

I felt my pants slide down and as I pulled away for a breath, I managed to get my shoes off so I could step out, leaving me in a tank top and boxers. Ryan back up as I nudged him, letting him sit on the bed. I moved forward, straddling his lap, connecting our mouths again, my hands in his beautiful golden hair. I felt his hands kneading my hips, I couldn’t help but moan out as he did. I wanted to feel those hands all over me, feel them touch every bit of my skin. I shuddered at the thought of his hand around my cock, I moaned into his mouth as I thought of it. I moved back, standing as I motioned him to scoot back.

He did and was fully laying on the bed, before climbing back on, I tugged off his shoes, letting them fall to the floor. I crawled onto the bed, straddling his thighs as our eyes connected, I reached down and grabbed onto his belt, pulling it free before unbuttoning his blue jeans. I moved up off him a little as I pulled them down so he could get them off. He started to move to work them off, but being kneeled above him caused him to accidentally rub up hard against me. I gasp and shuddered, he paused a moment before continuing again, rutting against me with his leg. I moaned as he did, he sat up a bit, grabbing hold of my arms, pulling me to lay fully with him as he kicked off his jeans. He left love marks all over my neck and shoulder, I clutched onto his shirt, my cock throbbing against his leg.

I could feel him smirk against my skin as he rolled us so he was above me, motioning with his fingers to flip over. I did so and was on my stomach under him as laid his weight down onto me. I turned my head so we could kiss more, I moaned into the kiss as he was all over me, feeling him on me was the best thing ever. I felt one of his hands caressing my side before forcing its way between me and the bed underneath. His hand slid to my middle and slipped into my boxers, I gasped and already bucked forward. I felt Ryan’s deep breath against my neck as he slowly grabbed hold of my hardened cock. I groaned as felt him take hold of me. I tried rocking my hips but his weight held me in place and I whimpered in need.

He slowly ran his hand up and down my shaft, groaning into my neck as he bit more and harder. I moaned loudly and turned my face into the pillow to muffle myself a bit. Every touch was like fire, I shuddered as he kept going at such an even pace. He had just started but I was already panting heavily. I groaned under him and just kept trying to grind against his hand. He slowly went faster and I was just moaning with not being able to move much with him on me. He used his free hand to grab my hair, pulling my head to the side a bit and kissed me hard. I moaned into his mouth as he went even faster. I could feel heat building up in my abdomen, I clutched onto the bed, breaking away from the kiss and moaned even louder.

“R-Ryan! I-I’m g-gonna-!” I gasped as his response was to go even faster, gaining an even louder cry of his name as my body shook as I came. After I had, all my muscles relaxed and I laid on the bed in a panting heap. Ryan moved off me, laying next to me and smiling at me, pulling me close. I turned to face him, letting him kiss me once more. I blushed though when I felt my wet boxers against him, he didn’t seemed phased and just kept me close. He rested his head on top of mine as I pressed myself into his neck, relaxing and falling asleep with his arms tightly around me.

*~*~*~*

We woke up fairly early the next morning, Ryan was up first and had woken me. He told me he needed to get back before anything would cause his family to start asking questions. I understood and got dressed with him, I couldn’t help but steal glances at him as he did, seeing him getting his own views of me getting dressed. He was ready before me, and offered to wait, but I let him go on ahead, telling him I would see him at the hand out. He kissed the top of my head before walking out, saying he would get the room paid for. I nodded and let him go, as I finished, I grabbed my phone. I smiled at the photo of us kissing, I sighed happily before going to change it back to the default wallpaper. Once everything is back to normal and we could tell the others, Ryan and I could have a normal relationship. I made sure I had my wallet and keys, but while I was getting them, my phone had rung.

I figured it was Ryan, that he had forgotten something. I was ready to answer that phone call but to my dismay, it felt as if my heart dropped to my stomach as the phrase “Restricted Number” came up on the screen. I was so used to that phrase, I didn’t need to ask myself who it was. I could ignore it but I knew it would be useless. I picked up the phone and answered.

“Y-Yes?” I hesitated.

“Gavin,” he said darkly, oh he was absolutely pissed, “I thought we had talked about this? If you would just stop being the whore that you are, Ryan Vagabond wouldn’t need to die.”

“N-no! Please Burnie! Don’t hurt him! I-it was me! It was all me!” I begged, Ryan didn’t need to be dragged into my mess.

“Such a shame. You said the same thing last time,” he replied dryly, “he can’t just touch you like he owns you. You know what happens, Gavin.”

“Burnie please don’t do this! Ryan doesn’t need to die! None of them do! Please, not like last time,” I cried into the phone. He didn’t even laugh at me, at how weak and pathetic he sees me as.

“Gavin, you know the rules. And Ryan has broken them,” I could hear him leaning back whatever chair he was sitting in, before letting his words just slamming me in the gut.

“Ryan broke the words, Gavin. Just like Dan did. And we both know what happens when you break the rules.”

“Burnie I swear if you hurt him-“

“What? That you’ll kill me? You said that with Dan and you still haven’t. What makes Ryan Vagabond so special? That’s right, nothing. You’re nothing, Gavin. Nothing you can do will stop me.”

“W-wait! Please, just…let me fix everything. Please just let me. Burnie…” I pleaded. After a moment, he took a deep breath, before responding.

“What do you have in mind?” he asked as I practically saw the twisted grin on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I would like to mention that the next couple chapters are gonna start getting a bit dark in terms as to relations with Gavin and Burnie. So more than likely I'll be updating tags and whatnot by the next chapter so just giving you a fair warning.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin feels that despite their best efforts, Burnie will still get to him. Are his worries proven right?

After that phone call I started to keep my distance from Ryan, I felt awful for doing so but I wanted to protect them, I wanted to protect all of them. Ryan easily caught on that I was avoiding him, he would try to talk to me but I would find some excuse to get away. I stopped going on jobs and I wouldn’t be anywhere near him while in the same room.

From what I’ve heard, or haven’t heard I should say, Burnie hasn’t been harassing them since the text. I was worried that he’d harass Ryan but so far he hasn’t. But as for me, I get two or three phone calls a day. Constantly putting me down, mocking me, I tried to fight back but he’d threaten their safety and I’d back off immediately. It usually left me in a sour mood afterwards, which made it hard to hide from the others. Michael was the first to figure it out, I was angry and not in the mood for jokes so when he wouldn’t stop I yelled at him. He usually would just yell right back, but he didn’t, he looked at me, read me like an open book before asking about Burnie. I just admitted that he was before Michael cursed and stormed off, no doubt to tell Geoff.

Everyone has been stressing out, it’s like we were all strangers to each other. Actually, I was the stranger, they all stared at me, whispering when I was around. It was like they forgot our friendship and I was just some stranger sitting where their friend should be. Maybe it was because I was keeping my calls with Burnie a secret, and they don’t know how to handle that I was hiding them in the first place. I was sitting alone when Ryan walked up and sat next to me. I moved to get up but he grabbed onto me and pulled me back down.

“Ryan, let me go.”

“No, not until we talk.”

I looked at him, shaking my head.

“There’s nothing to talk about, I just want to be alone. Please Ryan, just leave me alone,” I said trying to get out of his grip, but he wouldn’t let go.

“Gavin, please. I just want to talk to you, I want to understand. We have such a good time when we’re together. It’s awesome hanging out with you, but now you’re avoiding me and I want to know why!”

“Like I said, I just want to be alone, okay? It has nothing to do with that, I swear!”

He frowned, grabbing my hand in his, wrapping his free arm around my shoulders, holding me to his chest. I blushed, trying to push away but he held me close.

“Gavin, it’s okay if you’re scared. The others won’t admit it, but we’re all scared. We’re scared for you, we want to make sure you’re gonna be alright. Pushing everyone away isn’t gonna change that, it’ll just make it harder to help you.”

“I don’t need your damn help! I can take care of this! I just…I don’t…” I started before stopping, trying to pull out from his grasp, him loosening finally.

“You just what, Gavin? What has you so worried?” he asked.

“I don’t want you to get hurt! Or any of you! That already happened to me once before, I’m not gonna let it happen again!” I stood up, glaring down at him, “I’ll do whatever it is to make sure none of you get hurt. Especially you, Ry. No one is gonna get hurt because of what I brought.”

“Well that’s tough shit, Gavin,” Geoff stepped up, the others behind him.

“Geoff…” I said.

“Gavin, we’re a crew, and the crew sticks together. So shut the fuck up and accept that. Burnie is one man, and even if he brings a couple of his guys, we’ll be able to take them on. This is our turf, we have the advantage here. And getting hurt is gonna happen, we get hurt all the time, so what if it’s because we’re helping you out?” he finished. I was left speechless, I had no real argument against him, but this was still way more than they could handle. I just know it.

“I don’t think we’ll have an advantage when it comes to the city. Even if he wasn’t here the whole time, he’s been tracking me for a long time and can use that against us,” I argued when I thought of it. I shook my head continuing.

“You don’t know what he says to me in those phone calls. Aside from openly mocking me, he knows everything I do, before I do it…I can’t even go to the bloody beach without him knowing! I’m sure he has a decent grasp on where you all go and what you do. If anything, we’ve already lost that advantage because he knows every move we make as a crew!”

“If that’s true, we can always mix it up a bit,” Jack interjected, Michael and Ray agreeing. I couldn’t think of a good argument though, I just wanted them to understand that this was hopeless. I walked passed all of them, shoving passed Geoff and grabbing my pistol and a few clips of ammo.

“And where do you think you’re going?” Geoff demanded.

“I ain’t going anywhere now. But whenever I go anywhere, I’m bringing them with me. Los Santos isn’t safe for me anymore. Burnie could be around any corner, so I need to be ready.”

“Gavin, you’re being paranoid. Los Santos is a big city, plus there’s Vinewood so there’s no way he could find you so quick,” Jack tried.

“Jack, I bloody left the country and he found me! You think it’ll be hard for him to find me here? He could find me any time he wants!”

“So why the fuck would that asshole Church let you live here for so long if he’s been watching for you, and us, for all these years?” Michael glanced at me.

“To make me suffer,” I said through gritted teeth, “he waited until everything was where I wanted it to be,” I glanced at Ryan, “And now he’s come back to tear it all back down and drag me right back to Liberty City. If he doesn’t kill me, that is. Maybe he’ll let me escape and get away for another few years before taking that from me! And again and again and AGAIN until he’s had enough fun with me and puts me out of my misery or I do it myself!” I hissed the end.

Everyone’s expressions changed in an instant. Ryan came up to me, seeing the fury in my eyes, but as he stared into them, he saw past the anger and found the fear they were hiding. He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tight, I pressed my face into his jacket but held in the need to cry out in frustration. Geoff moved beside me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I pulled back and looked up at him, him smirking at me.

“Gavin, you really don’t know who we are, do you? We’re the Fake AH Crew. This is our city, and no one from the Cock Bite Crew is gonna win at our games. You don’t need to worry anymore. He isn’t gonna take us from you or vice versa. We’ll get him out of our city, and we’ll make sure it’s in a body bag. He’s gonna pay for all of this, we promise.”

I smiled softly, nodding my head before resting it against Ryan’s chest. Geoff glanced at both of us, nodding in understanding but didn’t say anything. I pulled away from Ryan, a bit embarrassed still. Ray and Michael came up, their arms around my sides, grinning like idiots, bragging how they’ll take Burnie out. How they’ll tie him up, letting him suffer like I did. I grinned as we were all huddled together, the other three smiling at us. Geoff told us all to relax until we leave, so that’s what we did. Geoff, Jack, and Ryan were all talking to each other. Michael decided to leave early, so we all said bye and he left. After a while, now that I was feeling better, I felt like going out. I asked if anyone wanted to, and Ray was the only one that wanted to so we headed out. We went to a close pub and had just a couple drinks, not wanting to get slammed tonight. After just a couple beers and a game or two of pool, we decided to head back.

We took a couple short cuts back to save time, cutting through alleyways and such. When we were still a few blocks away from the shop, we cut through an alley. As we started to reach the other end, a figure appeared. We didn’t pay any mind to it until a second figure joined the first. Ray already had a pistol and hunting knife out.

“Vav, it seems like these two idiots want to start a fight,” he grinned. I smirked, pulling out my own pistol. Before we started approaching the two figures, we heard footsteps behind us. We both looked back, eyes wide at one more.

“Three on two? Not too bad, we can manage, can’t we X-Ray?” I chuckled. Ray smirked and agreed, aiming at the one behind us.

“Absolutely, we’ve been in tougher situations.”

“Oh have you now, Brown Man? Or Ray Narvaez Jr. I should ask? Funny, how come little Gavvy here calls you X-Ray? Last time I checked, you hated that nickname,” came a voice from behind the two figures. I froze in place.

No. Not him.

From between the two walked out the man I never wanted to see again. Burnie “Church” Burns. Only then did I notice that the two figures beside him were part of his crew. Matt “Sarge” Hullman and Joel “Caboose” Heyman. And it would seem logical that the one behind us was “Simmons.”

Burnie stepped forward towards us, my hands trembled as I held up my gun. Ray’s hands were still pretty still as he aimed at Burnie.

“Yeah, I hate being called X-Ray. But only Gav here can call me that. He has special permission to. Now who the fuck are you?” Ray sneered.

“You don’t know who I am? I’m a little hurt, Ray. I mean I did talk to you on the phone a while back with the others. Gavin had put me on speaker, remember?” he grinned, walking closer to me, ignoring Ray entirely.

“Burnie Burns. Should’ve recognized that rat voice of yours. You stay away from Gavin!!” he shouted when he kept coming closer, my body frozen in fear.

“No need to worry, Narvaez. I’m not gonna hurt precious little Gavin…not yet anyway.” He placed his hand on mine, forcing me to lower my gun by just pushing my arms down. Ray stared at me in shock as I just stared ahead, too frightened to even look around. I could see Sarge and Caboose aim their guns at Ray, hearing them tell him to stand down. But when Ray wouldn’t, Simmons came up and hit him hard with his own gun, knocking him out cold. Only then was I able to move, looking down at Ray, screaming his name. I growled, aiming my gun at Burnie, but he was too quick, knocking the gun from my hands. He grabbed me and pulled me forward, spinning around and throwing me into the wall. His hand was around my neck as he held me there. I gagged as he tightened his grip as hard as he could.

“Oh Gavin, what am I going to do with you? You always keep getting yourself into trouble, when I’m just trying to look out for you. What kind of friend am I if I just let you go and destroy your life like you keep trying to do? I want you to be home and safe. Safe with me, your old pal” he grinned sadistically as he squeezed my throat. I gagged as I struggled for breath, glaring at him, waiting for his grip to loosen enough for me to speak.

“The o-only w-way I’ll be ‘safe’ is wh-when I n-n’ver have to see you a’in,” I spat. In his fury, he pulled me off the wall, throwing me to the ground, kneeling over me and holding me down. He grabbed my neck and started squeezing even harder. I gagged and groaned against him, my arms weakly clutching onto him, trying to pull him off. I started thrashing, trying to get out from under him, weak noises escaped my mouth as my lungs burned for air. I whined a bit, feeling light headed as everything started going white. But as it did, the crushing weight on my throat was gone but soon was received with hard punches to the face.

“Don’t go blacking out on me now, Gavin. We’re just getting started! We’re gonna have so much fun!”

His voice was like venom, I still struggled under him. His punches were hard, one so hard that the ground started spinning. While everything was spinning, I felt myself turning over. I tried crawling away, but he only dragged me back, and when he did, I felt his hands in my hair as he pulled me back and slammed me into the ground. I couldn't tell if my nose broke or not, but I felt the blood everywhere and saw it on the ground. He finally released me, but he wasn't done, he started kicking me and was just having a real laugh about it.

I wouldn’t let him beat me, I knew if I gave up, I’d be letting everyone down. I looked over at Ray, who was still completely unconscious. Tears stung my eyes as I tried to look for _anything_ to help. My eyes fell on a plank of wood behind the dumpster we were nearby. I looked up, all three of the others were looking away, like they always had. Burnie brought his foot down right in the middle of my back, it felt like my spine would break. I cried out in agony, reaching forward towards the plank that was just out of reach. I kept reaching, until I finally could grab it. I pulled it out and without stopping, I swung it around and hit Burnie right in the back of his knees. He howled in pain, falling to his ass. I reached for the closest weapon, Ray’s knife, rolling over to sit up, scooting back as I was holding it to him. The three men of his having heard at turned, all guns pointing at me as I held the knife to Burnie’s throat. He was surprised at what I had done, but he still grinned darkly at me.

“I guess you have gotten better, Gavino…good to know. I love a good challenge.” He put his hand on mine, pushing it down hard, punching me square in the jaw. I was so worn out I fell right back to the ground. He chuckled a bit as he stood, leaving me on the ground.

“Put your guns away boys. He can still live,” he smirked, wiping his sweat off his face, “I have a feeling I’ll be having a good time when we get him back. Leave him and the other one. We’re done here,” he smirked, walking away with the others, leaving me battered and bruised, and an unconscious friend.

*~*~*~*

It had been at least a couple hours until Ray came to. I didn’t have the physical nor emotional strength to ever have tried getting up during those hours. I managed to prop myself up against the dumpster, just slumping uncomfortably against it. Ray shifted a few times before sitting up, I could see him remember everything as he grabbed his gun, aiming around him. Once he had seen the coast clear, he looked around until his eyes landed on my body.

“Gavin!!” He got up as fast as he could, coming to my side as I just laid there, staring blankly at nothing, not speaking. He gently rested his hand on my cheek, stopping all movement when I had flinched. He carefully tilted my head so I could look at him.

“Gavin…what did he do to you?” he sounded chocked up, pulling his hand away, some of the dried blood on my face on his hand. I looked at him with sad eyes before looking away. I heard him pulling out his phone, calling the others. What seemed like moments later, I heard Ray calling for them. I could hear all of them running. Michael cursed loudly, proclaiming he would single handedly kill Burnie. Jack and Geoff questioned Ray and Ryan took Ray’s spot knelt down next to me, pulling off his mask. He gently cradled my head in his hands, rubbing my cheeks with his thumbs, careful not to hit my nose in case it started bleeding again. I chocked on a couple sobs when he was there, weakly lifting a hand, clutching onto his.

“R-Ryan….I-I’m so….s’ry…I didn’t. I didn’t want you t-to g-get invol'd…I’m s’ry I didn’t t-tell you…about 'm…” He shushed me gently, still rubbing my cheeks.

“Don’t apologize Gavin, this isn’t your fault…it’s okay that you didn’t want to tell me. I’m not mad, just please listen to me. You’re okay now, I’m here. Okay?”

I cried, squeezing my eyes shut as he moved back a bit, helping me to sit up better before carefully lifting me up. I laid there in his arms, just so exhausted and full of pain. I could feel the others’ eyes on me as Ryan held me. I didn’t care, I just clutched onto him with all my might. He carried me to the car, laying me across the back seat, letting me lay on his lap as we drove back. He carried me in and laid me down on the couch. Jack grabbed ice and bandages. As he and Ryan started cleaning my wounds, I laid there, not really listening to anything. Thankful though that my nose wasn't broken again. I could hear Geoff on the phone, Michael and Ray talking, and Ryan was still talking to me. I smiled at Ryan, putting my hand over his once again before closing my eyes, wanting to drift asleep, as I did, I heard Ryan whispering to Jack.

“This is getting serious, Jack. I don’t know what this Church guy is after, aside from breaking Gavin. But just openly attacking him? I’ll make sure this ends. Burnie Burns will die by my hands. Or at least by the crew’s hands. His death will be the only guarantee that Gavin will be safe from him.”

I squeezed Ryan’s hands in response. I felt him shift forward, kissing my forehead. I didn’t care that the others knew at this point, it was a welcomed gesture, helping calm my mind just enough to fall asleep, holding his hand close to my heart.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are a bit awkward in the Fake AH Crew. Gavin and Ryan have a heartfelt conversation and Gavin isn't sure what choice he should be making, one wrong move could ruin his entire life. Or possibly end it.

It had been an uncomfortable couple days as I recovered from my injuries. I would occasionally have headaches or back pain if I moved the wrong way. Honestly it seemed to bother the others more than myself; whenever I shifted wrong and grunted, they would have this pained look in their eyes. What bothered me most was Ryan did the same, even when it was just my arm, which I happened to pull a muscle when I hit Burnie with the plank of wood. His eyes just looked so defeated sometimes, but at least he wasn’t afraid to touch me like the rest. Anyone that passed by me and so much grazed against me, would apologize like they shoved passed me. But I would be reading or on my phone, somehow if he was next to me, his arms would end up around my waist so when I adjusted and made a noise, he would tighten his told on me, it was a welcomed comfort.

I was walking around, stretching a bit, rolling my shoulders when I passed Michael. He was looking down at his phone when we ran into each other. He started to shout but stopped when he saw it was me.

“Sorry, Gav…I didn’t mean to run into you…” he started.

“Don’t start, Michael…please. You and the others treat me like I’m made of bloody glass! If you’re worried about me or something, well don’t! Treating me like I’ll break at just a touch isn’t gonna help! So will you please just stop!?”

Michael didn’t say anything at first, looking away as he thought about what I said until he looked at me again.

“I’m sorry, Gavin. I guess we are all just…really shaken up about what you went through. We get beat up all the time, that's nothing new to us, but you've never gotten hurt as bad as you did. You told us how bad he was, and we took every precaution to make sure you were safe....and you still got hurt.”

“That wasn’t your fault…please stop thinking it was and treating me like you have been! I’ve been handling this better than all of you, honestly,” I smirked at him, he looked puzzled by my words, “I’ll be fine, Micool! I swear!”

Michael reluctantly gave in, smiling at me.

“Alright, fine. You’re my boi, Gav! I guess I can let up, I’m still shook up myself so I’m sorry for that.”

“Ah, it’s cool, no worries,” I grinned, he walked on and I saw Geoff come out of his office.

“Hey Gav, can we talk?” he asked.

“Yeah, sure,” I said, walking into his office, he handed me a beer before going to his chair. He sat down, waiting for me to sit. Once I had, he took a deep breath.

“So….how’re you holding up?” he asked, I took a drink, smirking.

“Loads better than you lot, apparently. I’m fine Geoff, I’m still a bit sore but I’m okay.”

“Gavin, you know I’m not asking about you physically. How are you holding up?” he asked again. I sighed, taking another drink.

“I’m doing alright I guess. Keep asking about it isn’t helping, I knew he was in town but I never expected him to just...show up. That asshole has always been fond of....showing off. He caught me off guard, I won't let it happen again.”

He nodded, apologizing then letting me go. When I walked out, Ryan was standing by the door, I was expecting him to also ask how I was but he didn’t. He only smiled softly, leaning forward. We was going to kiss me but I get so embarrassed when he shows any kind of affection in front of the others, so I put my hand up, catching him in my hand. I blush but chuckle a bit, pushing him back as he just laughs as well then settles for hugging me. I chuckle and worm my way out, I looked towards the others, Michael was standing in front of them, passing on my message of not treating me differently. I couldn’t help but feel relieved that things hopefully would at least partially go back to normal.

Geoff decided to stay late, letting me go home but Ryan had to go and couldn’t leave until he returned. Ryan was fine with it so we rode together on his motorcycle, my arms wrapped around his waist as he rode on. We arrived back and went inside, I was hungry so I decided to get something to eat, getting something for Ryan as well. We just lounged about the living room, flipping through TV channels until just leaving it on a movie or something. We weren’t really paying attention since we weren’t interested, so I was just leaned against him.

I couldn’t think of anything to say to him, and his silence meant the same for him. Whenever I looked at him though, he would smile so lovingly at me. Eventually he thought of something.

“So, I guess us going to keep our thing a secret didn’t go as planned,” he chuckled. I smirked and looked up at him.

“Ah, it’s alright. They were going to find out anyway. Just wish it were a different situation, though,” I sighed and he agreed.

“Ryan, I…I had a friend in England...before all this. Did I ever tell you about him? He tried to help me get away from Burnie before but... Burnie... Burnie killed him...” I started, but before I could continue, he stopped me.

“Hold on, before you start, don’t feel like you have to tell me everything. If you don’t want to tell me certain things, you don’t have to. Just when you feel like it, okay?”

I nodded and then he let me continue.

“Well…the beatings started just months after he forced me into his crew. I had screwed up on a job and sent me to a room for punishment. That happened a lot, multiple times a week in fact.. I had started to just accept the fact that I was his play thing that he could do anything with whenever he wanted. So maybe that’s why I’m handling this better than you or the others…because I’ve just gotten used to it.”

Ryan held me close, I could just see him processing all this new information, but staying silent.

“After a couple years of being with the crew, I had heard from home, an old classmate of mine, Dan. He was in the British Army and a very close friend. He came to see me out of the blue, but it must have been a day after I was being beaten at some point and saw what was happening to me. Dan knew he needed to get me out, so he helped me go back to the U.K. and stayed with me for a while. But Burnie didn’t give up, he found us and kidnapped us. We stayed in the U.K. as he mentally and physically tortured Dan and me. He broke us both, and once he had, he shattered me by…”

I couldn’t help but shutter as I remembered, I grabbed Ryan’s hand, feeling him hold me close.

“He killed him, shot him right in the forehead. Right in front of me…He told me it was my fault, that if I hadn’t run away from him that he wouldn’t have died. And so he brought me back to Liberty City. He took his frustrations out on me in a more violent sense, aside from just beating me like he used too, he started stabbing me, breaking bones and so forth…Until one day, he left an opening for me to get out once more. I took it and came straight here, to Los Santos. I stole a gun, wandered the streets for a few nights until I met Geoff. My life changed and I thought I finally got away from it all. But I guess that’s impossible for me.”

“Gavin…you are such a strong person. I mean, all those years of beatings…but before this all happened again, I’ve never seen you look so happy. I mean, happy enough that you would even like me. Going through something like that, I just can’t believe you could be with me…being able to trust someone that much.”

I looked up at him, shrugging a bit, “Maybe that’s why it took me so long? I mean we’ve known each other for so long but I’m just getting to know you? To date you? Pretty rubbish timing if you ask me, though.” Ryan chuckled at that, looking down at me.

“I’m just glad that you are doing alright, Gav. I know we all keep talking about it, but just know that we do mean it when we say that we’re going to stop Burnie. He won’t hurt you, not if I can help it.”

“Just don’t get yourself into trouble, you mong!” I laughed, I heard the front door open, Geoff walking in. He yawned as he greeted us, letting Ryan go. We said goodbye as he walked out, Geoff following him out the door, I couldn’t hear everything, but from what I could hear when I got up to listen at the door, they were talking about me. I listened closely and I could just hear something about Ryan better treat me well or else. I held in a laugh at Geoff acting like a dad sometimes when I could never imagine him ever being a dad, not for a long time at least. I heard Ryan laugh as he told Geoff he’d treat me like a king, and will protect me at all costs, especially from Burnie.

I felt my heart flutter at that, to hear him talk about me that way just made me so happy. I heard Ryan walk away and I hurried back to the couch. Geoff came back in and took a seat next to me.

“You two didn’t fuck on my couch while you were alone, did you?” he grinned.

“W-WHAT!? N-no of c-course we didn’t, Geoff!!” I exclaimed, blushing profusely, Geoff laughing at me.

“Good, cause you’d owe me a new one. If you wanna fuck, make sure it’s in your room! Anyway, how long have you two been together? It was just kinda shocking the way Ryan held you to him and when he kissed you on the forehead when we got you back,” he looked over at me, I shrugged.

“Probably couple weeks? A month? It’s hard to say how long, but it hasn’t been terribly long,” I stood up, going to the kitchen to get us some drinks, walking back and giving Geoff’s his.

“Well, I don’t have a problem with it unless the relationship causes problems. Like getting over protective and getting in the way of what needs to be done. So basically what Ryan has been doing recently by not letting you do your job,” he chuckled, “I get he wants to look out for you, but even I know that you’re not completely helpless. And I know I recently have been more careful around you, but I guess I just still had to process it all myself. You’re handling yourself well and I should’ve seen that. I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable, and it seems the others are doing better as well. I had heard Michael talking earlier so it should get better.”

“Yeah I know, Geoff. I actually got mad at Michael when he started apologizing. I told him off about how I’m doing fine and it would help if they wouldn’t act so weird around me,” I sighed. Geoff nodded, looking at me.

“I didn’t want to say anything until Ryan was gone, didn’t want him to get mad at me, but I listened in when you were telling him what happened to you. I just want you to know that I know, and I’m not going to tell anyone until you’re ready and I won’t ask you about it until you speak to me.”

“God, Geoff, you’re such a dad sometimes. But thanks for telling me, that makes me feel better that you’re not hiding the fact you knew what happened. So thanks for that,”

“Yeah well the dad thing isn’t sticking so don’t get used to it. But no problem, Buddy. Though it’s getting late, we should get to bed. Night, Gavin. Sleep well, you deserve it,” he grinned at me, putting our glasses away before retiring to his room. I stayed on the couch for a little bit before getting up, making my way into my room.

When I went in, I saw an envelope laying on my bed. I looked down the hall to Geoff’s room, his door shut. I turned back, and went to my bed, picking it up. I examined it closely, not seeing anything wrong with it so I opened it up. I saw some photographs inside, so I pulled them out. As I looked at them, I started to hyperventilate. These were photos of me when I was brought back to Burnie after Dan was killed, when he would beat me. I never knew he took photos, but here they were. A couple dozen photos of me, strapped to chairs, chained up, going from just beaten by hand to stabbed and having my arms and legs broken, some photos showing the bones sticking out of my skin. The only thing in the photos of me that I never once saw was my own face. Just my body.

That’s how I knew Burnie never saw me as a person. I was just a thing for him to vent all his frustrations. I threw the photos down on the floor, pacing threw my room. When did he even come here!? While we were all gone? While Ryan and I were here? Or Geoff and I? But I guess it doesn’t matter, they’ve been here, I’m not safe at all…not here or anywhere. And they aren’t safe either, none of my friends are safe. My boyfriend isn’t safe.

My choices have been becoming harder and harder to make, and been too scared to make the biggest decision of my life.

Do I stay here and fight or do I go back without a word? I knew essentially that is what it’ll all boil down too. And I honestly have no idea what to do. Risk all our lives for a chance for me to finally be happy and free, or go back, leave them out of my mess and save their lives, but in return lose any chance of me ever being free again?

Any sane person would say “Stay and fight” but with so much on the line, my whole life pretty much in danger of being destroyed and me end up going back anyway, am I really ready to risk that?

Probably not, but everyone is ready to fight for me. I guess I need to decide if I’ll fight with them or not. They’re ready to die for me. But I’m not ready. I don’t think I could live with the fact that they died because of me…

_What am I going to do?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for not updating until now, couldn't really get this chapter going but here you go!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry it's been so long! I just got kinda stuck but I managed to get the chapter done! :)

The next morning Geoff found me, still in my clothes from last night, curled up in a corner with a hunting knife in my hand that I had in my room. He saw the various photos sprawled across my floor but after just glancing at them he came over to my side. My grip was tight on the knife, my knuckles white while old tears stained my cheeks. He used caution when he knelt down beside me.

“Gavin? Buddy? It’s okay, it’s just me. Can you tell me what happened?” he asked gently, carefully placing a hand over mine that so firmly grasped the blade. After a moment, I looked up at him. Relief started to relax my mind, letting me to loosen my grip on the knife’s handle, allowing Geoff to take it away, tossing it aside gently. He pulled me into his arms, not saying a word as I just clung to him.

“G-Geoff…what am I going to do!? He won’t stop! I’m not safe, none of us are! Why is he torturing us all like this!?” I cried, trying to calm myself down. In frustration, I pushed Geoff away, standing up and started pacing around the room. Geoff stood and gathered the photos, wordlessly looking through them. He frown deepened as he went on, eventually he put them down and looked up.

“Gavin, where did you get these?”

“T-They were here on my bed,” I said as I bit my lip, “they were here last night on my bed, s-so I h-haven’t slept a-at all. I-I was too scared too…”

“Why the fuck didn’t you come get me!? I was right down the fucking hall!”

“I-I don’t know!! I j-just panicked and g-grabbed my knife! I couldn’t think properly!” I yelled. This was getting out of hand, I never thought Burnie’s little mind games would get to me this badly. I was panicking at the smallest thing out of place.

“Gavin, it’s alright. You were scared and that’s okay. Burnie is one freaky motherfucker, but we will do our damn best to make sure he doesn’t get to you. Do you understand?”

Hearing the same thing over and over again wasn’t helping, they could do whatever they wanted, but were they really able to stand up against Burnie?

“I-I understand…I understand. I’m sorry,” I whispered as I clutched onto my own arms. I looked over at Geoff, frowning.

“I want to stay here. I’m bloody tired and don’t feel like going anywhere. Please Geoff, just leave me alone…” I knew I was being a bit cold, but I really wanted to be alone.

“Well I can’t leave you completely alone, I’ll call Ryan and have him stay here with you. I have work to do so I can’t stay, but I’ll stay until he gets here,” he left after that, not waiting for a reply. I picked up the envelope of photos, sitting on my bed as I looked at them. Each photo with new injuries, I would pull at my clothes to reveal the old scars, to see if they were still there of if they had finally gone away. Most of them were gone but a few were still fairly visible. Looking at the one’s where he broke my bones were the hardest to look at, to remember. All that pain from the bones sticking out, the way he would worsen it by grabbing the broken pieces, twisting them and pulling at them, making it so much worse than already. The countless times I would pass out because of it.

I pulled up my pant legs, looking at their scars, feeling the pang of it in my muscles still. I sighed shakily, laying on my bed, holding them close. I just couldn’t stop thinking about what I should be doing. Should I stay or should I go? My heart screamed for me to fight, that I have what I’ve always wanted. But my mind was saying that I should protect them, and go back.

I went to the door and listened out, I thought I heard Ryan and Geoff. But it sounded like they were arguing. I’m not sure what though so I walked out. They both stopped and looked at me. Geoff looked a bit angry and Ryan annoyed.

“We’ll finish this later,” Geoff finished as he walked out, leaving us together.

“Is everything alright, Ryan?” I asked.

“Nothing for you to concern yourself with, but I should be asking you that,” he returned.

“I’m just fine,” I lied, “I couldn’t sleep but that’ll be fixed soon enough anyway.”

“Geoff told me about the photos, is he right? Are they photos of you?” he asked.

I nodded, I went back to my room, grabbing them and handing them to him. He looked them over, giving me a couple, and I showed him my identical scars. He frowned, looking at the rest before putting them back in the envelope and putting it down.

“Where did these even come from, Gavin?” he asked.

“I’m not sure exactly when, but I’m sure one of Burnie’s men broke in here yesterday or last night and left them on my bed.” I took back the photos, excusing myself from Ryan as he went to sit on the couch. I returned to my room, laying the photos down on my night stand. After standing alone in silence for a few moments, I suddenly felt arms gently wrapping around my waist. I turned my head to see Ryan there, I smiled and turned fully, pressing myself into him, burying my face into his chest. I wrapped my own arms around him in return, clutching onto his back. I pulled back a little, looking up into his shinning blue eyes.

His head tilted to the side as he leaned down, pressing our lips together. Pulling away just a moment, he pulled me to my bed, laying down before pulling me to lay on top of him. I curled into him right away, kissing him again as a hand gently started to caress my cheek, moving into my hair as he held me to him. I pulled back, moving so my knees were on either side of him as I sat on his legs. I leaned over, pulling down his jackets zipper, letting him sit up to shrug out of it. He laid back down on my bed, myself following to lay on his chest. I moved up, connecting our lips again. He hummed into my mouth, his hands moving to my front, pulling my buttoned shirt apart.

I pulled back, taking my shirt off, followed by my tank top. Ryan had taken off his shirt and gazed at my torso, his eyes wandering along my arms and back to my toned stomach. His hands were all over me, I gave in to him, my own hands all over him, feeling his muscular body as I moaned into his mouth. He grabbed onto me, flipping us as he pinned me to the bed. He was on all fours above me, smirking at me.

“You sure you’re up to this?” he teased, I blushed and nodded, then he leaned closer and purred softly in my ear, “Are you up to going all the way?”

My eyes widened when he pulled back, that devilish smirk on his face, I took a deep breath and nodded. Ryan’s smirk twisted into a wide grin. He pulled away more, gently grabbing my belt. He looked up though when I took in a sharp breath. I blushed and looked away, it was a gut reaction since Burnie was around, he paused and frowned.

“Gav, if you don’t want to do this, we don’t have to…”

“No I do! I-I just…it surprised me, is all. I-I’m sorry Ryan..” I stuttered a bit, he took a deep breath but agreed.

“Alright, but if you want to stop at all, please tell me. I don’t want to hurt you, okay?”

I nodded and he gently grabbed my belt again, pulling it loose. I was a lot calmer now that I knew we were actually doing it. I started pushing my jeans down as Ryan undid his own belt. He pulled his own pants down, kicking them off and pulling mine off to join them. He moved back up, grinding his hips against mine, feeling our cocks rubbing against each other in our boxers. I moaned loudly, pushing my hips up against him. His eyes looked over my neck, I could see that he was looking at the still visible bruises that Burnie had left. He leaned down, kissing each bruise gently and softly. I hummed as he did, it felt like he was kissing away the painful memories.

I wrapped my arms around him as he kissed my neck and continued to grind against my hips. He turned and caught my mouth, his tongue forcing its way in, my tongue wrapping around his. His hips ground against me, making me moan in pleasure. I felt his hand sliding down my front and as he lifted his hips slightly, slipping his hand down into my boxers.

I bucked into his hand at the touch, moaning into his mouth. I clutched onto his back, holding him to me. His hand slowly wrapping around my hardening cock as I moaned once more and he started to slowly run his hand up and down my shaft. I pulled away and gasped in pleasure as his thumb massaged my tip. His eyes shined as he grinned at me, then whispering softly.

“Gavin, do you have any lube? I’m sure you’ll love it even more…” I nodded, I reached over to my night stand, feeling around until I found the bottle and a condom. He took both, laying them aside for now. He sat up, looking at me in my boxers still.

“Gonna be kinda hard if you and I are still in our boxers, you know,” he teased. I blushed, starting to reach for them but he stopped me. Instead he moved down a bit more, I felt his lips on my stomach and his hands on my waist. His lips caressed my skin as he kissed his way down, just above my boxers. My breath hitched as I could feel his teeth gently catching them as he slowly pulled them off. His hands helping as he kept me held down. Once my hard on was out in the open I moaned, he let go of my boxers, his hands pushing them down the rest of the way as he chuckled at how red in the face I was. He was about to take off his own when I stopped him.

“W-Wait, Ryan…um, switch with me,” I asked, he seemed a bit confused but complied. As we moved, I kissed him passionately, staying with him until I was over him as he laid back down on the bed. My hands trembled a bit in nervousness but I definitely wanted to do this.

I moved down and pulled his boxers off. He hummed in delight and anticipation as I leaned down, running my tongue along his own hard on. I could hear him take a deep breath as I took in just his tip, swirling my tongue all around it.

“Fuck, Gavin,” he breathed out. I took in more, feeling his cock fill my mouth. It took everything for me not to gag but I managed. His breathing deepened as he moaned. I looked up with partially lidded eyes as one arm was back gripping the headboard of my bed, the other grabbing my hair. I moaned against him, causing him to buck into my mouth, moaning loudly. I moved slowly, deep throating him, I could see the muscles in his arms tighten as he gripped the headboard tightly, restraining himself. His head was back as he moaned again, he gently tugged at my hair, making me look up at him.

“H-hold on there, Gavers. When I come, I want it to be in you…come here, baby…” he purred at me. I pulled back just a bit, taking him out. But I wasn’t quite done yet, I lifted his member up, licking all underneath it. I caught him off guard as he bucked in my hand, moaning my name. He grabbed my arms, pulling me up, crushing our mouths together. He held me tight as he flipped us again, reaching for the bottle. He popped it open, squeezing some lube onto his fingers, then pressing a first finger in me. He moved slowly, I knew he was going to be as gentle as he could.

I pulled him down and kissed him hard as he moved his finger, gently introducing a second. I moaned as his fingers curled and stretched me, soon the third joined and I was just a mess already. I was breathing heavy and holding onto Ryan as tight as I could. He pulled his fingers out, grabbing the condom and putting it on before getting the bottle once more, squirting lube onto his hand then rubbing it all over his cock. He placed himself at my entrance, just barely pushing in when he looked down at me.

“A-Are you ready, Gavin? We can stop now or whenever it becomes too much, okay? You don’t have to…” he said softly. That’s the one thing I loved about him, despite how big, tough, and angry he could get with everyone, he was always calm, careful and understanding when it was really important when it’s me. I smiled at him, nodding, just needing him right now.

“Oh god, please Ryan! I need you right now! Please!” I begged. He slowly pushed it, stopping whenever I flinched at how big he was. I moaned in pleasure, nodding for him to continue, he slowly pushed in until he was fully inside me. He rocked his hips to let me adjust easier, I looked at him, wordlessly asking him to continue and he did. He went really slow at first, only speeding up when I wanted him to. The way he would pull out and thrust back in made my body shake with need. I was a moaning mess, I never really knew how loud I was until now. I held onto Ryan with all of my strength, our lips constantly together. He went faster and faster, I could feel the familiar sensation in my abdomen, I raked my nails down his back when it hit, hearing him hiss at the long scratches I left.

“Ryan!!”” I cried when my climax hit me, coating both of our stomachs. He grunted loudly when my muscles tightened around him, he came after I had.

“Fuck, Gavin!” he was breathing heavily as he rode out his orgasm, slowly pulling out and removing the condom, tying it shut as sat up. He grabbed our boxers, pulling his on and gave me mine.

“Here, I’ll clean this up, you put these on and lay back down. I’ll be back and we can lay together for a while.”

I nodded, grabbing them. As I grabbed them, he didn’t let go, as he held onto them, he leaned forward, kissing my already swollen lips, then to my cheek and in front of my ear. I heard his still heavy breath as he hummed to me.

“I love you, Gavin,” he whispered, pulling back, letting go of the boxers as he grabbed his undershirt, pulling it on. I didn’t know what to say, I just blushed and smiled at him. He smirked, kissing my forehead then grabbing everything he needed to clean up, walking out with just his shirt and boxers on.

I got my own boxers on, grabbed my tank top and put it on as well. I moved our clothes out of the way at least before laying down to wait.

But when he didn’t come back after 10 minutes, I started to worry. I got up, pulling a tee on and my jeans. I walked out, my bare feet making my steps much quieter. I walked down the hall to the living room where I hear him last. I gasped when I saw him unconscious on the ground. He was facing my way, I knew he was just knocked out because I saw him breathing. I rushed to his side, looking him over. I felt the back of his head. There was definitely blood and a lot of it, he was hit pretty hard.

“Ryan!! Ryan wake up!! Please wake up!!” I yelled at him, but didn’t move. I grabbed his hand and felt for his pulse. It was there and it wasn’t too bad. Neither was his breathing so I knew he wasn’t in too much danger from not breathing or anything. I was worried that he had a concussion. I tried everything to wake him, shaking him, yelling at him, just anything to get him to wake up. I saw his phone on the couch. I grabbed it and called Geoff.

“Hey Ryan, what’s up?” Geoff answered.

“G-Geoff! It’s me, Gavin! S-Someone broke in a-and knocked Ryan out! H-He’s alive but he won’t wake up! Please help me! Send anyone, just get here soon! I don’t know-“

My sentence was cut short by an arm suddenly around my throat. I gagged, dropping the phone, hearing Geoff shouting, trying to get me back on the line. I coughed and gagged as loudly as I could so Geoff could hear. The arm was really strong as it crushed my wind pipe shut, I was trying so hard to pull the arm off of me, but as it became harder and harder to breathe, I lost a lot on strength in my arms. Everything was going dark around me, I could feel the arm tighten just enough to cause me to lose all grip entirely as I fell into blackness. The last thing I could see was Ryan's unconscious body in front of me. I tried to speak but nothing came out, the words only echoing in my mind.

_I love you too, Ryan._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I wanted to make the chapter a bit longer since you waited for a while but I did what I could. Also, I haven't written a sex scene in a long time so sorry if it's different to what you normally read. I definitely wanted it to seem more as them being intimate with each other aside from just...you know, fucking.
> 
> Other thing I wanted to mention. A couple chapters probably will being changing P.O.Vs and be from Ryan's perspective. I'll leave a note on when that will be and put "Ryan's POV" In the text as well. I generally don't like doing it, but it's the only way things will make sense throughout the chapters


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We get a look at where Ryan is at and we find where Gavin has been taken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, yep, also doing Ryan's POV in this as well in this. You'll know who it is because it'll say at the top haha.

*~*Ryan’s POV*~*

Everything felt weird. My body felt heavy. I was standing in Geoff’s living room, and suddenly everything had gone dark. My head hurt too, I’m not sure why.

 _“Ryan!! Ryan wake up!! Please wake up!!”_ I heard someone cry out. Was I not awake? I know that voice, a voice I could pick out of the largest of crowds. I tried to call out back to him, but my body was completely numb. I could hear him yelling at Geoff. But Geoff wasn’t with us, he had left hadn’t he?

My head hurt so bad, I couldn’t figure out why but something felt wrong when I couldn’t hear Gavin anymore. I kept trying to move, but nothing was working. I heard something clattering to the floor before I was swallowed up by nothingness again.

*~*~*~*

I felt rough shaking, my eyes cracked open, the light blinding me momentarily before clearing up. I saw four men around me. My crew members. Geoff and Jack were closest to me, Michael and Ray a bit further back. I looked between them with heavy eyes, their voices still sounding distant.

“Come on, Ryan. Get up, now. We need ya here with us,” Geoff said. I looked at him and the others once more before something clicked. There were only four of them, not five. I looked around the room, trying to find our Brit, when I didn’t see him, I looked at Geoff with wide eyes, opening my mouth, trying to speak.

“G-Ga..” I tried.

“What is it Ry? Come on, out with it,” Jack responded.

“G-Gavin. Where’s Gavin?” I gritted out. They all shared looks, before frowning at me.

“Gavin’s gone,” Michael said.

“He called me when he found out knocked out, but while he was on the phone, someone grabbed him. When we got here…they were already gone, just leaving you here,” Geoff explained. After that, I shook my arms out of their grasp, starting to sit up.

“W-We have to find him!” I growled, “Who knows what they’ll do to him. It has to be Burnie that has him!” I tried to stand, but Jack pulled me back down, gently pushing me back down on my back. But the slightest touch to the back of my head sent bolts of pain down my spine. I howled in pain, curling up as my hand touched where it hurt. I brought my hand back and it was covered in blood, both dried and fresh. Ray went and got some rags after seeing, Jack sitting me up, using the rags from Ray to start cleaning the wound on the back of my head. All the movement was making me dizzy, after Jack got me cleaned up, he tried to get me to rest but I just couldn’t. Not with Gavin out there somewhere.

I ignored everyone when I stood up, realizing I was still in my shirt and boxers. I shuffled my way to Gavin’s room to retrieve my clothes. The others kept grabbing my arms to help me stay balanced but I only pulled away. I used the wall to balance myself as I left them there. Once I made it to his room, I shut the door. I walked shakily to his bed, where my clothes still were. I tripped over my own feet and fell. I crawled over to the bed, pulling myself up onto it and started redressing. Once my boots were tied, I had regained more of my stability as I walked out to the guys. They all sat around each other, like they were talking but they stopped once I emerged with my crew clothes back on.

“Help me or not, I’m going to look for Gavin. He belongs here with us,” I said. The others only nodded, I saw my mask laying on the couch. I grabbed it, looking at it before the guys. My signature dark smirk curled my lips as I pulled it on.

“Of course we’re helping, you fucking idiot,” Michael retorted.

“Damn right we are. But I’m the one in charge, so I’m making the decisions,” Geoff replied, “I know you know what you’re doing, but you’re too involved with Gavin to make clear enough choices. You should know that.”

I just looked at him, but I nodded. I knew that my feelings would get in the way of making the right judgments. Gavin meant so much to me, but that will get me killed if I’m not careful. What good am I to Gavin if I’m dead? The others and I went back to the body shop that we used as a hang out. It was so different being here. The air was just so heavy, and Gavin not being here made it worse. We went to the office next to Geoff’s, where we had a big map of the city when we usually planned heists to make some extra cash. The desks were covered in newspapers and photos.

Taking a closer look at them, the newspapers were from Liberty City and the photos were of a few men.

“What are these?” I asked Geoff.

“I had some contacts up in Liberty City, he found me as many copies of different papers involving Cock Bite. And these are the men that are here that came for Gavin. Ray picked them out, he doesn’t know their names. Well only this one,” he said. He picked up a photo, handing it to me. It was a mug shot from a prison in Liberty City. A guy with a partially rounded face, brown curly hair, facial hair with a mocking smirk upon his face. I glanced down the photo, my eyes widening in anger.

“That’s right,” Geoff answered my unspoken question, “That’s Burnie ‘Church’ Burns. He’s the one that’s got Gavin.”

Anger flowed through my veins at I looked at that smirked face. This photo was years old but it was like he was mocking us all right here. I threw the photo down, looking at the others, seeing who else was here with him. I heard a knock at the door to our shop. Geoff and Jack left to go check it. Michael picked up the photo, raising an eyebrow at Ray.

“Are you serious? This is the guy after Gavin? He’s got a smug face but he doesn’t look all that strong.”

“Well, strength isn’t everything, Michael,” Ray said, “He obviously has some kind of power, you didn’t see how absolutely terrified Gavin was when he saw him. The moment Gav saw him, he froze up, couldn’t even look at me or Church, let alone speak. Whatever he’s done to Gavin in the past must have been some seriously messed up shit. Church didn’t even have a gun, but even with Gavin and I both aiming our own guns at him, he just strolled up and pushed Gavin’s hands down.”

I looked at Ray when he explained everything. I was so worked up when we had gotten to them, I now realize I never knew what happened before hand.

“Ray, what else happened there?” I asked.

“It’s hard to say, I can’t really remember much cause I was knocked out. Just that when Church was near Gavin after he froze up…it was like he had total control over him. With just a touch of his hand, he pretty much disarmed Gavin. I saw that Gavin had loosened his grip on his gun when he lowered it. The terror on his face though when Church looked at him…I’ve never seen him like that before. Once I had regained consciousness…I saw what had happened, and you know the rest Ryan,” Ray said softly at the end.

I did know, after Gavin had fallen asleep after Jack treated him that night, I had pulled him into my arms and held him all night. He had cried in his sleep, no doubt because of what Burnie had done to him. And the painful memories it had brought back. I vowed that night that I would do anything in my power to make sure Burnie paid with his life.

I read a few newspaper articles talking about Cock Bite, learning all I could about them. Jack walked back into the office with us, Geoff behind with someone else as well. We all looked at the guest, Geoff introducing us.

“Guys, this is an old friend of mine. He lives up in Liberty City and found all this info on Cock Bite. His name’s Adam Ellis. Turns out he and one of Church’s men used to be co-workers.

Adam nodded at us, handing Geoff a folder.

“I’d say nice to meet you, but timing is a little shit right now,” Adam said. He lifted up one of the photos, showing us one of Burnie’s crew members. I tall guy with short black hair and with a slight tan.

“This is Joel Heyman, better known as ‘Caboose’ in Liberty City. He and I used to work together. He was a lawyer and I worked at his office. But he got really heavy into the Cock Bite Crew and eventually stuck with it full time, quitting his job, only helping out criminals. We were good friends, but after he left the office, I never saw him again. Grif here and have known each other through contacts. But I find it rather odd that Cock Bite is here. Care to explain why?”

“Yeah, do you know Gavin Free?” Geoff asked. Adam had pondered before shaking his head. Geoff described what he looked like, and that seemed to trigger a memory. Adam asked for the folder back and looked through it. He pulled out a couple photos he had, pointing at them. We all looked and we all saw the familiar friend of ours, right next to Burnie. My eyes narrowed at how beaten Gavin was in the photos. I could see multiple bruises peeking out from under his clothes. I saw the cuts and black eye on his face were impossible to miss.

His eyes looked so defeated as he glanced at Burnie in the picture. He held his hands together and stood firm beside that asshole. Another photo was kind of similar, the only difference was Burnie and Gavin looking at each other. The way that Burnie had a victorious smirk and Gavin had only fear and defeat in his features, the marks and cuts worse than before, the black eye being even darker, like he had one on top of the other.

“I never realized that he was a part of your crew,” Adam said as we all studied the pictures. I looked up at him.

“Do you know where they could even be!? We have to find Gavin!” I said, Adam only shrugged, not knowing. I don’t know why but he just seemed too calm for this, I gritted my teeth, turning and pacing the room.

We just have to find Gavin! I don’t know what I’m going to do if we don’t. I already told him I love him, what would he think if we never tried…

*~*Gavin’s POV*~*

There was a bright light when I woke up. I went to cover my eyes but my hands wouldn’t move. Once they adjusted I looked around. I was in a small room, no windows at all just a door. And the room had nothing in it, just concrete walls and a concrete floor. Absolutely no way to tell where the bloody hell I am. I looked down, my hands were tied to a wooden chair, and so was my torso. I tugged at my restraints but they wouldn’t budge, I pulled as hard as I could to try to loosen them but it didn’t work. I sat there in silence, it was way too quiet. I couldn’t even hear cars or anything, I thought I heard water, so we must be close to the ocean.

The silence was deafening as I just sat there, who knows if it was just minutes or hours. I was completely alone so I just kept thinking back to before I was taken. I hoped that Ryan was okay, that the guys got to him and everything. I know they probably are going to make a plan to find me but I find it highly unlikely in all honestly. I know they’ll fight but they know nothing about Burnie, how he works or plans. Los Santos is such a big city, they wouldn’t know where to start. Up in the mountains or downtown? There’s so many possibilities of where I could be. I knew soon enough Burnie would be here, this was how it was when I was brought back from the U.K.

What felt like hours passed slowly until I heard a door opening and shutting in the distance, several footsteps in the hall when they all stopped outside the door. I gulped as I heard muffled talking before the door unlocking and Burnie walked in. I glared at him as Simmons and Sarge followed him in. Burnie didn’t say anything, just smirked as I looked at the other two. They had some electronics and a small table. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion as they set up some what they had. My jaw clenched when Sarge sat a camera down, facing me. Simmons whispered something to him and he went behind me, pulling the chair back from the center to the back. I tugged at the restraints again, glaring at the three men.

Burnie came up to me, leaning down, the same smirk he’s always had.

“How’s it going, Gav? So glad we can finally catch up after all these years. I know last time went a little too fast, but I’ve made sure we’ve had plenty of time together for a few days. And if you’ve been a good boy, we’ll bring you back to Liberty City since you proved you earned another chance to stay with us. But if you don’t behave yourself, you aren’t going anywhere….ever again.”

I stared at him in fear, he went to the other two, grabbing a roll of duct tape and tearing a piece off before putting it over my mouth. He smirked as his hands trailed down my face, I tried turning away but I could only turn so far. He pulled back, when I looked up he backhanded me. I groaned in pain but didn’t look back up, I kept my sight towards the ground so I wouldn’t look at him.

“That’s barely the beginning, my dear Gavino. It really starts once Caboose gets a special laptop set up, because he’s gonna give it to your crew. And the only thing they’ll be able to access with it is a video feed that will come from that camera.” He grabbed my face, pointing me at the camera on the small table. I whined looking at the camera, I didn’t want them to see this, why did Burnie have to be this thirsty for power.

“We’ll see you tomorrow, Gavin. Sleep well,” he chuckled as the others finished setting it up. They all left, locking the door. I stared at the camera in front of me, I wonder when Caboose will get them the laptop, the camera was on, I could hear it. The thought that Ryan is going to see me like this, see Burnie take his rage out on me, just made me hate myself. I should’ve know that I’d never get away, I brought everyone into my mess and it was all my fault.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Violent things happen, just so you know. I'm too tired to type it.

***~*Ryan’s POV*~***

All of us couldn’t sleep at all last night, we were all huddled around in the office reading newspaper aritcles about Cock Bite, discussing with each other, Adam Ellis included, about what we would need to do. Adam told us about where Cock Bite usually would hide out in their city to help us figure out where they could be hiding Gavin. It was about 6:30 am when we were getting drinks, mostly energy drinks, taking a needed break after all we did. I was standing in silence while the others made extremely small chat between each other, most of it falling flat when Gavin’s name was mentioned or just had nowhere to go. Adam came and stood next to me, offering me another drink, I thanked him and took it, he studied me briefly before looking away.

“So who is this Gavin to you? You seemed most concerned. Of course the others are worried, but you? You have something different about you,” Adam said to me, I looked at him, sighing.

“Yeah, Gavin and I…well we’re…” I started.

“Ah, I understand, say no more. You seem a bit uncomfortable talking about it right now. And I bet you’re asking yourself how I knew?” he smirked at my confused face, “I’m good at reading people, I just kind of noticed.”

“Do you think we can find him, Adam? Be honest. I don’t want any false hope if it’s only going to crush me in the long run.”

Adam tilted his head in thought, sighing.

“I can’t say. Cock Bite is completely ruthless. It definitely won’t be easy, but there’s no guarantee that we’ll even find his body if he’s killed. You need to be ready for anything. Whether he’s alive or dead, or we even find him for that matter, you need to be ready for anything. You’ve seen the photos he’s in, you’ve seen what Burnie has done, and will do again.”

I didn’t speak, he was right. Burnie wouldn’t go easy on Gavin, not after he’s been running for years. I took another sip of my energy drink, willing the energy to come to me, my eyes heavy with exhaustion. I was about to lay on the couch when there was a knock on the front door. I was closest so I went to the door, despite our exhaustion, everyone had their hand on their guns just in case. I slowly opened the door, hearing Adam draw his gun. When I opened it, it was one of Burnie’s men, the one that was friends with Adam. My jaw clenched as I glanced at Adam who looked angry as I looked back.

“Can I help you?” I muttered.

“My name’s Caboose. Church sent me here to deliver this to you,” he handed me a bag with both hands showing he wasn’t holding any weapons at least. I hesitantly took it, him assuring me all that was in there was a laptop.

“Church wanted me to tell you that all you need to know is on this computer. I can’t tell you what is on it, but he said if you killed me here, he’d find out immediately and kill Gavin on the spot. So I hope you value his life enough to let me…Adam?” he trailed off in shock when Adam came into view.

“Caboose…gotta say when my pal Grif here told me Cock Bite was causing trouble down here, I just had to come see for myself! You little birdies are a little far from the nest, aren’t you?”

The guy that went by Caboose tensed, staring intently at Adam before baring his teeth a bit in frustration.

“Adam, you always get in my way, stay out of business you’re not needed in. This is you’re only warning I’m giving you as an old friend. I can’t guarantee that you’ll live if you butt in like this.”

“Caboose, I was in long before you met me. Cock Bite never scared me and it won’t now, and take that ‘as an old friend’ bit and shove it up your ass!”

Things were getting heated so I pushed Adam back, the others grabbing him as I faced Caboose.

“We get the point, if we kill you, Gavin’s dead. I don’t know what you’ve got planned, but we’ll stop it,” I growled, “get out before I beat the shit outta you.”

Caboose didn’t say anything after that, just nodding and putting on a pair of sunglasses and walking away to a car a bit down the road. I saw someone else in there but I couldn’t see who it was. They drove away and I shut the door. Adam and Geoff were talking to each other and the others were just relaxing a bit. I looked at the bag in my hands and went to the table. I pulled out the laptop, examining it to make sure it hadn’t been rigged with anything. Once I cleared it, I powered it up.

Once in the computer, there were only two icons, a notepad file and a link connecting to the internet. The notepad file was names “Read first” so I opened it up. It didn’t say much but the link went to a private video stream that only this laptop could connect to and that the video stream wouldn’t go like until 6:55 am.

The time seemed very strange to me, but I opened it up, seeing a window that the video would play in but a message saying it wouldn’t show anything until 6:55am. I told the others, they were getting more energy drinks and coffee. When the time came, all of a sudden there was sound coming from the laptop. I took a seat at it, the others gathering around. It was hard to make out anything, there was just a shred of light peaking in from a door. After a moment we heard noises, sounding like someone groaning in pain. We all soon recognized that it was Gavin making the noise, but we couldn’t see him.

I looked at my watch, 6:58 am, what were they trying to do? We couldn’t see anything, just hear, but then we heard lights switching on. After a moment, and a quick glance at my watch, 6:59 am, the lights came on in Gavin’s room. We all gasped as we saw him tied to a sturdy wooden chair, his head hung low. The room had no windows or anything, just all bare stone. We should’ve figured they wouldn’t let us see where he is, but watching him wake up as he looked around the room and started struggling against his bindings crushed my soul.

I only worried about what they would do to him, we heard a door open, I glanced at my watch for the final time, 7 am. They wanted us here earlier just to taunt us. I couldn’t see how many there actually were, but the only one I focused on anyway was Burnie. Anger boiled inside me when he went to Gavin’s side, tilting his head up before grabbing him hard by his jaw and pointing his face at the camera, like he was looking at us all. I could hear the others talking but I could only focus on the two men on the screen.

“Would ya lookie here, Gav? Looks like you’ve got an audience,” Burnie murmured to him. I clutched onto the table in anger, Burnie was mocking us and using Gavin to do so. Gavin didn’t say anything, just looked fearfully at the camera like a deer caught in headlights. We all watched as he tried to free his face from Burnie’s grip, but we saw him only tighten it, making Gavin whine a bit in discomfort. I watched Burnie’s face switch from amused to angry, pulling back and straight out punching Gavin in the face. I watched with wide eyes as Gavin cried out a bit, before looking at Burnie again. This time, I only saw anger in Gavin’s features. I had a feeling this was going to go on for a long time.

As the minutes turned to hours, we all were just frozen watching Gavin being beaten. His face was a mess, swollen, bloodied, bruises and cuts all over. He never once pleaded for help, I know he was trying to be brave for us, but we all knew he was scared. I saw the exhaustion in his face, his breathing heavy from all the beating. My knuckles were either white from holding onto the table or red from my blood as I bit them to keep myself from just yelling and shouting. After he started doing more than just punch him, I couldn’t help but cry out in anger and fear.

“Gavin, no!!”

***~*Gavin’s POV*~***

_Bollocks, that hurt._ I thought after the first punch. I glared at Burnie, I knew I couldn’t show weakness now. Not with Burnie’s plan on having everyone watching me. He met my glare with another punch, then continued his punches as hard as he could. He hit me from every side of my face, I could taste the blood in my mouth but I held in my cries as best as I could.

After what seemed like hours of him just punching me in the face, he stopped. I took a few shaky breaths, knowing this moment of peace wouldn’t last long. After a couple breaths, I dared to look up, and as soon as I did, I received a swift kick in the stomach. Actually it was more like him stomping on my stomach even if I was in the chair. I screamed in pain, blood dripping from my mouth, I shakily looked up at the camera. I couldn’t help but smile, wanting to show Ryan and the others that I’m okay, but Burnie saw.

“What’re you smiling about, huh shit head?” he yelled as he grabbed my hair, yanking my head back. I felt him punch me square in the chest and I coughed hard, losing my breath. I panted heavily when he stepped back a moment. He went to a bag that he had one of the others carry in, fiddling through it until he pulled out a small knife. I swallowed hard as he walked back, carelessly holding it in a way that the others watching through the camera could see it. He went behind the chair, grabbing my hair and pulling my head back once more. My breathing quickened in fear as I saw the blade, him holding it in front of my face. He drew the sharp end close, as a reflex I held my breath, but I groaned out in pain when he pressed it to my cheek, dragging it up against my face.

I could feel my blood dripping down and running along my neck. The cut stung, I looked at Burnie and he was just grinning like a fool.

“Feel like smiling about that, Gavvy?” he snickered as he let my hair go. The cut wasn’t too deep but the blood was irritating on my skin as what ran down my neck started to seep into my shirt. I felt his hands on my shoulders as they slid down to my front. Taking hold of my shirt, he pulled the fabric open, showing my collar bones and some of my chest. I felt the cold metal right in top of one of the collar bones, holding in as much of my cries of pain as I could as I groaned loudly while Burnie dragged it along. I was panting heavily, trying to keep a brave face as I knew my friends were watching. He kept cutting along my chest and somewhat on my face. He never cut very deep and avoided any major artery, this wasn’t to kill me, it was to torture me, to break me, and I knew it all too well.

“W-why c-can’t you accept th-the fact that I want out? I w-want away f-from you?” I growled at him, whimpering when he added another cut, this time to my arm.

“Why on Earth would you want out, Gavin?” he purred darkly, “I’ve done nothing but protect you. You’re the one that always runs out, getting into trouble. Making me come out to get you, and having to punish you accordingly.”

He grabbed my face once more, I felt the blood squish between his fingers as he forced my gaze to the camera.

“Now, before we continue, Gav, I need you to do me a big favor. Tell me who you’re whoring yourself out to. Who are you being bitch to? I want to hear it, I want you to admit who you’re being a dirty little whore to. It’s not that hard, just tell me his name.”

“N-never.”

His grip tightened painfully tight, pushing hard on the cuts on my face, forcing the two ends apart, feeling his fingers dig into my skin. I cried out at the feeling, struggling to turn away from him. He let go only to punch me square in the jaw.

“You don’t have a choice, Gavin. Admit it. Who are you fucking with!? Who are you letting touch what’s rightfully mine!?” he screamed in my face, I squeezed my eyes shut, this was just like last time. He knew the answer, he only wants me to break down. Just like with Dan, but I won’t let him win, not again.

“No one! I-I’m not letting anyone touch me. N-no one ever does, Burnie, I-I’m just trash, l-like you said b-but I work only for you!”

Burnie kneelt down in front of me, his eyes stone cold, he whispered softly so the camera wouldn’t pick it up.

“If that’s true, then return to Liberty City with me. You’ll finish your punishment there but we’ll leave the city by morning.”

I gulped, whispering back, “I’ll go with you on one condition.”

Burnie’s eyes narrowed, but asked my condition.

“Let them go. Please, if I go back, you let them live and can stay here.” After a moment I spoke a bit louder, I needed the guys to know what decision I’ve made.

“I’ll go back to Liberty City with you, I’ll never leave your side again. Just let them go and live their lives as they had before.”

Burnie didn’t soften his narrowed eyes, if anything they became narrower as I could practically feel the rage boiling inside him. He stood, going to the camera and laptop, typing for a bit and then turning the camera off. He stopped the feed, but he didn’t untie me. I shook in the chair when he came back, him looking only angrier and angrier.

“You think I’d let you parade yourself down here in Los Santos just to ask to be brought back to Liberty City and me not punish whoever you’ve been fucking with? Gavin you’re just as dumb as you look. You’ll be going back to Liberty City alright. But they’re still going to pay for what you’ve done with them. Do you understand?” he growled. He came closer, punching me and kicking me once more, adding more bruises and to my face and body. My arms and legs shook in pain as I panted heavily.

I saw Burnie at the laptop again and flipping the camera back on. When he stood up, he smirked, and I knew that smirk all too well. Even when he wins, he still wants to flaunt his power. He walked over, standing off to the side so the camera was still focused on me.

“You want to return to Liberty City with me, eh? Want to stay by my side? Well you’re going to have to prove it to me somehow, my dear Gavino. So go ahead, tell them you're done with the crew, that you're coming back home with me.

I whimpered a bit, looking away from him and the camera. Of course Burnie would want to do it this way, I glanced at the camera, my jaw clenched. I looked away in shame, mouthing an “I’m sorry” to my friends who certainly were watching. Burnie wasn’t looking at me for a moment, so I looked at the camera, mouthing words again, I tried to tell them “Please don't be mad.”

"It's t-true. I-I'm done. I can't take being in the crew anymore...I'm going back h-home with Burnie," I could feel pain just by saying that. I absolutely hated it and Burnie knew it. I tugged at my restraints again to no use, but then I realized that my legs weren’t tied. When he wasn't paying attention to me, I caught him off guard for a moment and I kicked him in the knees.

He cried out in pain, backing up from me. Simmons and Sarge came in, Simmons going to Burnie as Sarge came up behind me, tying a gag around my mouth. Burnie glared at me, standing up shakily with Simmons’ help.

“You really know how to get yourself fucked, Free. Next time you wake up, you’ll be in a world of hurt. But don’t worry, your friends are still fine for the time being. Can’t guarantee anything about you though. Maybe if you convince me, I could let you live. If you act out again, then you’ll really pay.”

I glared at Burnie, my jaw still set. I heard a slight shuffle behind me, and suddenly felt a hard hit to the back of my head, knocking me out as I slumped forward in the chair.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More violence! That's gonna happen a lot.

***~*Ryan’s POV*~***

Saying I was worried was the biggest understatement of the year currently. I was pacing all over the room, Ray and Michael were talking quietly amongst each other, Jack was silent, and Geoff was talking to Adam about plans on how to look for Gavin. I couldn’t focus on anything they were saying, the only thing filling my mind was Gavin’s screams of pain. I knew I had to be strong for Gavin, who knows how long it’ll be until we get him back.

I went back to the laptop, watching as Church cut at Gavin’s chest with a knife. I kept watching until my eyes widened when I saw Gavin saying something quietly to him. I called the others over and they all watched. We all heard Church yelling at Gavin, but Gavin pushing back. We saw him talking but he was being too quiet, he had this pleading look to his features. Geoff was first to react when Gavin spoke up and made a deal with Church.

“What!? Why would he do that!? He got away, we can get him back and keep him safe! He doesn’t need to go back!” Geoff yelled. I watched Gav as Church backed up, eventually the screen went dark.

“What happened to the feed?” Geoff asked in a panic.

“Not sure, I can’t really do anything that’ll risk our ability to use this laptop,” I replied, and after a few moments of waiting, it came back online. My stomach flipped when Church demanded an act of “love” for Gavin to prove himself that he wants to go back. There’s no way he’ll do that. No way.

We were all watching once more, Gavin looked at us through the camera, I could see the fear and sadness in his eyes. My chest tightened when I saw him mouthing an apology to us. My hand was at my mouth, biting my knuckles when he asked us to look away. But I couldn’t, the others couldn’t either, we watched as Burnie started touching Gavin, kissing him. I put my face in my hands, just trying to deal with Gavin going through this. I looked up when he whimpered when Burns bit his lip. I was about to walk away and pace the room once more until Gavin suddenly started fighting back. We all jumped when Church cried out in pain, two of his men coming in.

We all watched as Church spoke angrily to Gavin until one of them knocked him out. After he was limp in the chair, Burnie turned and faced the camera.

“Hope you boys enjoyed the show, boys,” he said with a grin, “Since Gavin was being disobedient, he’s going to be punished tomorrow. You wouldn’t want to miss that, now would you? Gavin will be ready tomorrow morning, 7am once again. Maybe he and I will make a bit more progress. Though I do enjoy when it takes him a long time to learn his lesson...” he trailed off, practically purring at us in delight. He smirked at us as the screen went dark. I looked at my watch and it was in the late afternoon.

We just spent the whole day watching Gavin beaten and we did nothing. I felt so powerless right then and there. Gavin needed to be here with us, not wherever that bastard had him. After a few minutes of just staring at a black screen, Geoff finally got our attention.

“Alright…Let’s gather around, we need to work out a plan. Adam, you’re familiar with Cock Bite, where would they normally hide out in Liberty City? If we know what kind of places they would go to, we could narrow down areas to focus on to searching for Gavin,” Geoff looked at the others, taking a deep breath, “finding Gavin is our number one priority. I know you guys want to just off these guys once we find them, but if we kill them before we find Gavin we might not ever find them. I may have not dealt with these guys before, I know how a crew like this works. They’ll have him hidden really well, got it?”

We all muttered our agreement, I stood, pacing around again. Adam spoke up again.

“Well, they always like using abandoned buildings or construction sites. If Cock Bite uses a construction site, it’s because they plan on killing whoever they interrogate, easier to dispose of the body and make it seem like an accident. But Burnie wants to bring Gavin back. It’s hard to say, I’ve seen a few construction sites in Los Santos and Vinewood, so far none of them seemed to have a way of hiding someone there for days on end.”

“Brown Man and I can scope out the different sites, see if we can see them sneaking around,” Michael offered, him and Ray standing next to each other. I took a long, quiet breath before adding in.

“Jack and I can use the maps, looking for the construction sites, abandoned buildings, and even general areas that would be good hide outs. Adam could help us out by looking at the maps and joining us out on the road,” I suggested.

“I like that idea Ryan. But I’m still worried about how you’ll be able to think clearly,” Geoff said honestly, “I know you’re a great shot and incredibly smart, but your involvement with Gavin could cloud your judgment…”

“Geoff, I respect you and I’ve always agreed with your decisions. I’m asking you to trust me that I can handle this for now. But if you ever start to think I’m going to be a problem, just say the word and whatever I’m in charge of, you can pick someone else. Please, just give me a chance to help.”

After a few moments of Geoff looking at me carefully, his shoulders relaxed and he nodded. He and I agreed that I can work and help find Gavin until I became a hindrance and would cause problems. We shook on it, him going to his office after telling Michael and Ray to take one of the maps and search the city. They were to mark where construction sites were, mark it on their map and call in after a couple hours with their locations if they had finished or to just go until they were done then call.

I gathered a few different maps: one of all of Los Santos, one of Vinewood, the beaches, and other smaller maps of sections of the city. We went to a small room in the back, it was mainly storage but we pulled everything out of it. I hung the largest map up on the wall, having a small desk pulled into the room, laying the smaller maps on it. I called Jack and Adam in with me, we grabbed stools and started looking at the maps. We had both markers and pencils, using the pencils to mark just probabilities and used the markers once we could confirm places of interest.

I stood as the other two looked over the smaller maps, I studied the large one hung on the wall. I looked at all the roads and locations printed on the map. Seeing different buildings that were well known on it, I looked near the top, where there were just mountains. I saw that in the middle on the mountain range, there supposedly was a single building. I couldn’t figure it out so I used a pencil and circled it, writing a few notes to find out what it was.

“We can check it out, but I doubt Cock Bite would hold up there, Ryan,” Adam said, looking up from his own map.

“What makes you say that? It seems like the perfect spot, out of town and secluded,” I countered, confused on why he would say that.

“Precisely. It’s the perfect spot. They wouldn’t go somewhere so obvious. More than likely they’re in town, could be in the most populated part of town, that way they could come and go as they please without anyone being suspicious. But we can still check it out.”

“I guess you got a point there. So how long have you known Caboose?” I asked.

“Too long, but I’m not gonna let our old friendship cause me any problems. I’ve had enough in my life happen that makes it so I can push past any sort of relationship. Like what I told him when he tried to prevent me from getting involved, I was in a way before we had even met.”

“How long have you been in then?” Jack wondered.

“Since I was a kid in my early teens. I’m 23 now, and I’ve only known Caboose for a short time. So I’m not too concerned about what they’ll do to me. I have enough street knowledge to get by. It’s why I’m not in their group or even dead, they know who I am and what skills I have, but they’re always just outta reach of me. And I suspect me being here helping you is going to put some pressure on Church. He’s the one that wanted me to join Cock Bite. Caboose was against it, that I was ‘too young’ for it, and Simmons and Sarge didn’t really care for me at all, thinking I was immature or something. But when they all found out what I could do, I mean could really do, Church was even more interested as were the others. Caboose was still against it, but I declined.”

“You ‘declined’? Why would you do that? I mean if they’re such a powerful crew, why not?” Jack asked Adam.

“I knew it wasn’t the place for me. I said I’d rather work freelance, not be tied to a crew. Church was extremely upset, declaring that if I wouldn’t willingly join, I’d be forced in. But I was always a step ahead of them after that, always getting away from them. Caboose and I made contact a few times, but it wasn’t for more than a few seconds because he was always with someone. And I would get away.”

“Seems like fate that you’d be helping some guys against Cock Bite,” I chuckled, Adam smirking.

“Seems so. Of all people, Grif and his crew need help with those dicks, so I’m glad I can help with what I can.”

After a few hours, we got a call from Michael and Ray, they told us all the construction sites. We marked them all down with our markers. They had also told us that they had some extra time and found some other places that they could be hiding out in and holding Gavin. I wrote down the places, marking them on maps as well. They hung up, going out to look for more probable hide outs. Geoff came in to check our progress, he then stayed and talked, helping us figure out who would check where when we get a full list of possible hits. We at least figured out who were going to the sites, Geoff deciding that though he trusts me, that I wasn’t going. I argued that I could do my job, but he shut me up quickly, threatening to not letting me do anything if I kept arguing with him. Frustratingly I surrendered, not wanting to blow my only chance.

*~*~*~*

The next day came slowly. We actually managed to get some sleep the night before but not much. All of us marking an alarm for the early morning. We knew Church was going to broadcast again by beating Gavin. I made my way towards the laptop, booting it up. The others gathered around, either sitting or standing. The video was on but it was dark like yesterday, after another painstaking wait, the lights came on and we were shocked once again.

Instead of Gavin strapped to the chair he was in yesterday, he was on his knees. His arms pulled above him with two heavy chains which I concluded were attached to the ceiling. I could see the bruising around his wrists from what I would assume was him fighting back. I could see some dark spots as well as some cuts around on his hands and arms too. Instead of a tired glaze to his features, Gavin was alert and looking up at the binding chains. He pulled at them and tried to free himself but failed to, the chains only seeming to tighten around his wrists further.

We watched as Burnie walked in, smirking as he always had. He walked past Gavin, but stopped to kick him in the stomach, causing my Brit to suddenly cry out in shock and pain from it, groaning as he’s unable to curl up instinctually. Burnie continued behind Gavin, grabbing his face, forcing him to look at the crazy man.

“Well, well, Gavino. Seems you get to have your wish and have your favorite punishment! Isn’t that exciting?” he asked too cheerily, causing me to scowl at the computer. I saw Burnie receive a bag from one of the others, pulling out a whip of all things. My face paled as I felt my body run cold, flinching when I heard the first crack of it. Gavin shuddered as he heard it, I could only see Burnie’s amusement as he readied himself. But instead of striking Gavin with it, he wrapped it around his throat, choking him. Gavin gagged and struggled, and I could only take so much. I hurried out, going to the small bathroom in the building. I steadied myself at the sink and mirror, looking at myself. My hair was a mess and I had heavy bags under my eyes. I looked as if I aged decades in just a matter of a few days, my phone buzzed and I pulled it out, seeing it was a friend of mine.

Well, a friend of James Haywood. He had been asking where I was and I had been telling him that I was taking a break, going on a trip. I needed to focus on the crew and Gavin with Cock Bite here so I decided to “leave” so that Ryan Vagabond could focus. I was about to return, hearing Gavin’s cries through the speakers of the lap top. But as I left, the others were giving me weird looks, as I sat back down, I soon figured out why, and I know that I’ll soon be in some deep trouble with everyone.

***~*Gavin’s POV*~***

I gagged when Burnie wrapped the whip around my throat, struggling to get him to loosen it. I could hear him laugh as he choked me, my hands trying to pull themselves free from the chains to pull the whip off my throat. I coughed and gagged as I struggled to breathe, whimpering when he only tightened it.

“Now Gavin, remember yesterday when I asked you who were whoring yourself out to? You know as well as I do that you’re lying straight through those beautiful teeth of yours…but I’m a forgiving man, so I’ll give you another chance, who is it? Who is touching my property?” he grinned sadistically. He released his grip around my throat, removing the whip and moving back. I took a moment to catch a much needed breath.

“Who is it, Gavin?” he asked again, a lot of his previous humor to his tone now gone.

“N-o one, Church,” I growled. I couldn’t hear anything for a moment except him taking a deep breath. He was mad, I could tell. After a moment of silence, I heard a quiet wooshing sound, but before I could even think about what it was, I heard a distinct snap of the whip and my back was on fire with pain. I cried out in pain, whimpering as I sat there on my knees, my arms holding up my body as I tried to get over the burning sensation.

“Who is it?” he growled, I gave him the same answer and received another harsh snap of the whip. My body jerked forward as I cried out, holding in my sobs as my body trembled.

“Gavin…” he started.

“It’s no one! I swear, Burnie!” I pleaded, earning another whip to my back. I practically screamed as he did it a couple more times, I did my best to hold up as much as I could. I could feel blood seeping from the cuts that the whip left. I cursed internally as I couldn’t hold in my cries, just sobbing quietly. I wish Ryan would just break in through the door and save me, take me away from all of this. But I knew he wasn’t, he was watching though, through that camera that was focused on my face.

“Come on, Gavin. You know the pain will stop if you would just stop lying to me. I hate liars so much, so please make this easy on both of us.”

“Burnie, I swear. There’s no one else involved! You have to believe me!”

“Too bad I don’t.”

The whippings wouldn’t stop after that. Just one after the other, the pain burning all over my back. It was enough to tear through the back of my shirt after a while, leaving my bare back to take all the hits. Even though the shirt provided little protection, the whip having direct contact with my skin seemed to make it so much worse. Burnie wouldn’t even stop to demand answers, I could practically see the grin on his face as he whipped me harder and harder. And one can only endure so much.

“OKAY!!! OKAY!! I’ll tell you!! Just please stop!!” I sobbed, and he did stop.

“Who is it, Gavin?” he asked, a dull purr to his voice.

“R-Ryan…his n-name…is R-Ryan…Vagabond. H-He’s the one th-that’s been touching your property, Burnie. I-It was him…” I cried as I surrendered Ryan’s name, I looked at the camera, hoping that he could see my apology in my eyes.

“Oh Gavin. You misunderstood my question,” Burnie chuckled. My eyes widen as I looked down in confusion, trying to figure it out what he was after.

“Gavin, I’ve known you’ve been fucking Ryan Vagabond since the very beginning. But I have a very sneaky suspicion that you know something more about him. Or maybe he hasn’t told you yet? After all, you are just being his little bitch aren’t you? Why on earth would he tell you things that shouldn’t concern you?”

I swallowed hard, I think I know where he’s going with this. Does he really suspect that Ryan is not who he says he is? I must admit Burnie has always been one that catches on to things that no one even considers as possibilities. So even if he does has the idea about Ryan, there’s no way he could figure that I of all people would know.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Burnie. His name’s Ryan Vagabond, what else do you want from me?”

I heard Burnie chuckle, I glanced up at the camera for a moment before looking down again, I heard him snap his whip against the air, causing me to flinch as I trembled.

“Here’s your question, Gavin. Is Ryan Vagabond a cover up name? What’s his real name?”

“Th-that’s two questions, Burnie,” I half joked. He didn’t find it funny though since he came up behind me and kicked me in the back where all the cuts were. I cried out, collapsing so that only the chains around my wrist were holding me up.

“Being a smart ass isn’t going to help you now, Gavin. Quit fucking around and answer the god damn questions,” he snarled, cracking the whip behind me once more.

“I-I’m sorry!! B-But no, I don’t know if Ryan’s name is fake. His name is Ryan Vagabond, that’s all I know!!”

He didn’t say anything, maybe he was actually going to listen to me. He hummed in thought, walking around. My heart was beating so hard, I thought everyone could hear it.

“Maybe you wouldn’t know…I mean you are just his bitch, right?” he grinned when I nodded, “So even if I was right, I wouldn’t be surprised that you wouldn’t know. But that begs the question, what about the rest of your little crew?” he pondered, walking up behind me, I looked up at him, but he looked straight ahead at the camera.

“How about it, Vagabond? Are you really who you say you are? I’ve meet a few people who covered up their identities, are you one of them?” he smirked at the camera, he grabbed my hair, pulling my head up, forcing me to look at the camera, “Are you hiding anything from your crew? From Gavin? I can’t imagine why you would do such a thing if you really cared about my little pet…” he slowly let my hair go, moving his grip to under my chin to hold my head up, tilting it up more as he kissed my forehead. I whimpered as he did, him letting me go, letting me hang my head in shame.

“I have a real good feeling about you, Vagabond. You seem so fascinating. If my suspicions are right and you are leading a double life, I’m going to find out who you really are. I think we’re going to have a lot of fun. And to make it better, Gavin will be with us to enjoy it!!” he laughed as he lifted my face and nuzzled it, my eyes tightly shut in disgust. Burnie back up a bit, putting the whip that he was holding down, I heard him draw his gun. I braced myself for being bloody shot but it never came. All I heard Burnie say was “Sleep well, Gavin” before being struck against my head, falling unconscious once more.

***~*Ryan’s POV*~***

I felt lightheaded at what happened. Everyone was giving me a weird look when I came back, and when I returned to my seat, I heard Burnie talking to…me? He’s called me out on what I’ve built up for years! Just who the hell was this guy!? I glared at the screen when he nuzzled Gavin, seeing Gavin clearly unhappy just made my blood boil.

I squeezed my eyes shut as he knocked Gavin out, muttering to one of his men. He adjusted the camera a bit so he was in front of Gavin but still in focus as his men started taking him down from the chains. I saw as they roughly held him up, his back facing the camera, letting us see the multiple gashes in his skin, his blood everywhere. Soon enough, his was taken out of the room, leaving only Burnie.

“Ryan Vagabond…I wonder if I’m right about you. Are you leading a double life? And if so…which life is real, and which is the fake? Are you really just some common criminal, or are you something else? I really would love to find out. So I’m going to be keeping a close eye on you…you better be careful, you never know what I might hear. Until next time,” he grinned as the screen went dark. I sat there, looking at the dark screen, my jaw clenched. I waited and waited, just wanting Geoff to call me out or yell at me for it. But when he didn’t I just looked at him.

“Alright, everyone get some rest. There’s a lot going on, having you all exhausted isn’t gonna help. Using all we gathered yesterday, we’re gonna start actually looking at places. I know it’ll be hard to get any sleep, but just remember that Gavin is waiting for us so we need to be ready,” Geoff announced to us all, telling us when to meet up. Everyone gathered their things, leaving for the night. Adam was staying here though, and as I was about to leave, Geoff came up to me.

“I wanna talk to you in my office,” he said, turning and going in. I sighed, laying my things back down and going to his office, closing the door behind me.

“Geoff, I know what you’re gonna say and-“

“Don’t, Ryan. Listen closely and listen well. We sure as shit are talking about this after this whole mess is taken care of. But so far you’ve been nothing but reliable. As friends, I’m willing to put this aside until we have Gavin back and Church is dead. Do you understand?”

“Yes sir,” I nodded. Geoff stood from his desk, walking to the door, placing an unlit cigarette in his mouth. He paused, looking up at me where I stood.

“I trust you, Ryan. This news hasn’t changed that. I don’t care if this is who you really are or not, you get the job done. But like I said, we will talk about this,” he paused, lighting the smoke and taking a deep inhale of it, “I don’t know what Church might be cooking up for you, but you best be on your toes. Get as much rest as you can, we’ll actually be out on the streets looking. We’ll find Gavin, I promise,” he said as he walked out, leaving me alone.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” I whispered. I kept Adam’s words in mind, that anything could happen to Gavin. The possibility that we’ll only find him dead weighed heavily on my mind.

I barely remember driving home, let alone laying in my bed. I just stared up at the ceiling as guilt ate at me. What if I couldn’t save Gavin in time? What if even after everything we did to get him back, he’ll only be a corpse? My stomach churned as I thought about it, my guilt becoming an actual pain to me.

As I laid there in my clothes, I could only close my eyes and just imagine that he was safe, away from Burnie Burns. He should be here with me, in my arms. I longed for him to just be with me instead of where he was, so I could heal his wounds instead of receiving more from that bastard. My body felt heavy as I let sleep take me away, though I’d only be plagued with nightmares of losing Gavin forever. Everything was falling to hell, how long would it be until we all are swallowed up as well?


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan recalls his first time meeting Gavin, and tries to get in contact with some old friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shit on my dick, this is so late.
> 
> I'm really sorry that this took so long to get out. I tried making it longer but I quickly found that doing so wouldn't let it get anywhere with how I wanted the chapter to end. I really hope that the next chapter won't take so long...
> 
> And HEY~ A whole chapter from Ryan's perspective, and you get to see how he met Gav for the first time~ Hope you enjoy the chapter~

I woke up groggy, exhausted. I sat up in my bed, stretching as my back popped in response. I looked around the room, looked at all the expensive decorations and furniture. Living the rich life never really suit me. You think it would if you grew up wealthy, but I just never really liked it. But I never imagined that my life would lead me to living two separate lives, and having it all put in danger by a mad man I’d never met because of another man that I love.

But now isn’t the time to worry about that. I need to focus on finding Gavin, and I can’t let James Haywood get in my way of doing so, I need him to be out of the city for a while. I grabbed a duffle bag from my closet, putting my crew clothes in the bottom before covering them with other clothes. I packed at least two weeks’ worth of clothes and other little necessities before zipping it shut. I threw the bag on my bed, dressing in some old clothes, retrieving my bag as I left my room. One of my housekeepers came up to me, I smiled as she looked me over questioningly.

“Mr. Haywood? It’s unusual to see you dressed so…poorly. Are you expecting to get dirty?” she joked.

“You could say so,” I replied, “I’m actually going out of town for a much needed vacation. At least a couple months. No need to worry though, I’ve wired my accounts to keep paying you. I want you to keep the house kept while I’m away. And to make sure I’m not bothered, I’m not bringing my phone or a laptop or anything. Please do me a favor and let my parents, friends, and business partners know.”

I handed her a list of the people to contact, she nodded and wished me well on my “vacation.” I went to my garage and got in an old car. Of all the cars, it was the worst, but it was perfect when I needed to go anywhere before I could change into Ryan Vagabond. I pulled out, quickly speeding off to an old abandoned building. No one has been in it for years, not even other gangs are usually over here. Still, I bought the place and fixed it up just enough to be livable in. Completely solid and perfect for hiding in.

I went to the room I fixed up as a bedroom with just a mattress and an old wardrobe. I put my clothes in it and changed into my signature blue and black leather jacket. I held the mask in my hands, my thumbs rubbing the material before putting it down. I pulled out the cell phone that I use for my crew use. The one that had the photo of Gavin. I smiled softly looking at his goofy grin, longing to see that again. I took a deep breath and started scrolling through contacts.

I started making calls, getting in touch with old acquaintances to help me locate Gavin. I gave them descriptions of Cock Bite, telling them to call me if they find any leads or Cock Bite themselves. I called Geoff, telling him that I had some contacts out on the look. It didn’t take long for one of my guys to call back, claiming to have spotted one of Burnie’s men. We agreed on a meet up, after hanging up I gathered my things. I grabbed a jar of some black paint, which I would use to put around my eyes whenever I went on a mission with the crew. Using an old, cracked mirror, I painted a crude black mask on my face then pulling on my mask. I looked at my reflection, I could only see the dark glare to my otherwise relaxed features, the black paint making me more cruel looking. The bright blue color of my eyes shining through the blackness. I zipped up my leather jacket, pulling on gloves and headed to the garage. I covered my car with an old tarp, keeping it far in the back, the tarp keeping it somewhat more unnoticeable should anyone happen to glance in.

I uncovered my bike, mounting it. I revved the engine to life, getting situated before leaving. I speed through Los Santos, the city a blur as I raced through. As I rode, I couldn’t help but remember the first night I brought Gavin home. I remember his arms wrapped tightly around my waist, how much I enjoyed it. How he became comfortable enough to ride like he would with Mogar or Brown Man, so I hit a bump on purpose so he would cling on once more. How I laughed when he had, feeling happy for the first time in a long while.

Once we get him back, I’m taking Gavin on a nice bike ride through the city, so he can actually enjoy a ride with me. I shook the thoughts from my mind though, not wanting to get my hopes too high that he’s coming back. It’s just so hard to think that way, to already have to partially accept the fact that he could die before we get to him.

I hadn’t seen it, but I was told how Burnie actually whipped Gavin when he wouldn’t cooperate. Wanting my name, no less. As much as I don’t want him to suffer, I’m glad that he’s as strong as he is, not some little kid that needs babysitting like I originally thought.

*~*Couple Years Ago*~*

I sat at a table, counting our money from a few heists we had done. Jack and Geoff were great leaders, and with Ray being a sniper, he was able to help out a lot without us three wasting so much of our ammo. I was putting the bills all together when I heard our door opening, I glanced over and saw Geoff come in with some kid. He hadn’t looked my way so I quickly put my mask on before going back to work. I looked at the kid though, he looked young. Not in his teens, at least early twenties; he seemed like he was most likely looking to hire. He kind of stood in the middle of the room when Geoff told him to wait while he grabbed something from his office.

He looked around a bit, but never looked in one place for too long, which didn’t help me relax as I kept my eyes on him. He looked my way, but as soon as our eyes made contact, he looked away. Glad he isn’t one to stare at me like others. Geoff came back out, pulling out a phone, handing it to the kid. I wasn’t sure why, but maybe it was to contact us when he needed us to do the job for him. Geoff started over towards me, motioning the kid to follow. I put the bundle of cash down, standing as I was approached.

“Grif, who is our…guest?” I asked, not bothering to look the kid over.

“Well, this is Gavin ‘Vav’ Free. He’s joining our crew,” Geoff said, the kid looking at Geoff, almost as if he was just as shocked or just surprised at how blunt he was about it.

“You’re kidding, right? This kid? Joining our crew!? Come on, Grif, we can find girl scouts better than this twig,” I snorted, irritated.

“Well, fucking get used to it, Mad King. He’s part of this crew, he’s got more to him than it looks,” he looked at Gavin, “This here is Ryan ‘Mad King’ Vagabond,’ he’s been working for me just about as long as Jack has. He gets his work done and makes sure not to leave any loose ends.”

I glared at the kid, annoyed he hasn’t at least said anything.

“You just gonna let Grif do all the talking for you? I don’t know what got you in the crew but you could at least introduce yourself without him,” I scolded.

The kid gulped but nodded.

“Pardon me, that was rude. The name’s Vav,” he introduced, holding his hand out, I reluctantly shook it. Honestly, the accent surprised me. I wasn’t expecting him to be fucking British.

“Grif, tell me. What about him made you do something as risky as to letting him join us? I know you’re picky about your guys, so what are his skills?”

“Well, when we met, he went from unarmed to having a gun pressed to my forehead before I could pull my own gun out fully. He’s fast and doesn’t miss. He’s perfect for anything up close that Brown Man can’t do.”

I listened, glancing over at the British kid standing next to him. My eyes narrowing as he kept looking me in the eye but looking away again. As we talked, I was slowly reaching to my back, slowly pulling out my concealed pistol from my jeans. The kid wasn’t really paying attention to Geoff or I much, which irritated me again.

“Hey Geoff, let me try something,” I said, not really changing the subject. I started to draw my gun, no intention of shooting him dead. But just as I was raising it, I saw a glint in his eyes and before I lifted it halfway, all I heard was a gunshot and my gun falling to the floor. I kept my eyes focused on Gavin before they trailed down to his hands, holding a pistol firm. Looking back to my own hand, I saw a scratch from where the bullet grazed my hand after hitting my gun.

Geoff and the others stood in silence, the air tense. Gavin took a few shaky breaths before finally lowering his gun, putting it back. He glared at me as I glared back. I kneeled down, picking up my now damaged gun. I looked it over, it being rendered useless, the damage too much to be worth fixing. I tossed it down on the table. I walked up to Gavin, towering over him as he looked up at me, attempting to meet my glare.

“I can see why Grif would want you,” I admitted through gritted teeth, “But just because you can shoot doesn’t mean you can be worthy of this crew. Let’s see if you really as good as Grif says you are.”

“Vagabond, you wouldn’t believe the things I went through. I hope you truly see me as an ally, a partner one day. But as for right now, I’m here because Grif wants me here. I have nothing to prove to you, you’ll see that I’m a necessity for this crew. You need me,” Gavin spat back. The kid had guts, that’s for sure.

“We’ll see about that, I can’t wait to see what you do for us, if you do anything at all,” I scoffed, walking past him, purposely bumping into his shoulder. I was about to leave when he called me.

“Ryan, just so we’re clear…had I not known you, or knew you weren’t actually going to kill me, I wouldn’t have just shot the gun of your hand. No, I would’ve aimed right here,” he said as he pressed his finger to his forehead, “I knew you would test me at some point, so I knew I didn’t need to kill you. I’m not one to take lightly.”

I admired that he talked to me with such confidence, most people are afraid to tell me off aside from the crew. I turned back to him.

“No, I guess I shouldn’t take you lightly. I like that, Vav…let’s see you make that true. This sounds like fun…” I snickered, smirking as I walked away, waving bye to the others. I could hear Gavin whispering to Geoff as I left.

“He definitely will be hard to prove how skilled I am. Hopefully he sees it soon…” I left as Geoff reassured that I’d eventually come around. I scoffed at the idea, there’s no way that shit will ever be true crew material. It takes more than a good shot to do what we do. He’s too naïve for this, he’ll just get himself killed.

*~*Present Day*~*

I came to terms long ago that I, in fact, was the one that was naïve, he improved his skill quickly and eventually came up wanting to practice with me. I was the best hand-to-hand fighter of our small group, and he wanted me to teach him to fight. I was reluctant at first, for how small he was, but I knew he needed to learn. My reluctance was the same reason I agreed, that he was such a small kid and I was so big and muscular. But I had known that he would need to learn how to take on guys my size or maybe even bigger. It took a while, but he eventually learned how to take me on by himself. I taught him as much as he could and I was confident he could take on anyone. I never really realized how strong he had gotten until we had some miscommunication between us and he pinned me to the wall, holding me there with a gun pressed under my chin.

I still felt terrible about what had happened between us that night and the morning following. He trusted me as his friend and having to treat him like scum was the worst feeling ever. I thought I’d never regain his trust after all that, but I’m glad we did. Maybe not the best of ways but at least we fixed it.

I made my way to a construction site north of Los Santos, riding through the grounds until I was safely hidden inside the building. I shut off my bike, getting off and looking around. I heard someone walking, but I couldn’t tell from where. My hand went to my gun, which was tucked away in my pants, I held it firm, ready to draw it if it wasn’t who I was expecting. I scanned all around me, trying to locate the source of the noise.

“Ryan? You here?” I heard a familiar voice call out, “Man, I can’t believe I still help you out…” I turned to find an unlikely friend.

“Officer Tucker, it’s been a while,” I chuckled.

“Yeah, cause I prefer not the LSPD know that I’m friends with a member of the Fake AH Crew. And it’s Detective Tucker to you. If we could actually talk on a regular basis, you’d know that I’ve done well for myself as well. Wash too.”

“Tuck, you know we’d talk if we could. But this isn’t a social call, this about saving a life, a friend.”

“Yeah, I got that. Problem is, is he isn’t a friend of mine, I shouldn’t even be doing this.”

“Damn it Tucker, he’s important to me! Some psycho from Liberty City came all the way here just to get him after watching him for years! I get that you don’t want to help because of my crew. But Vav….he…fuck Tucker…” I took a moment to take a breath, getting upset wouldn’t help me now, “Tuck…I love him, okay? After all these years being in a crew with him, I don’t know…I just know that I love him. I need to get him back, that’s all I want. I want him back where he belongs.”

Tucker watched me carefully, keeping his arms crossed as he listened. Once I calmed down, and explained everything that was happening, I could see the concerned look in his eyes. He asked about Cock Bite, and when I told him about them, he knew he might be able to help.

“I’ve heard about Cock Bite. They may be a small crew, but with how tight they run their operations, their name became known within the law. I can’t meet you all that often for reasons already mentioned, but I can see what I can find out. I’ll call if I find anything. Oh and here,” he said, handing me a small business card, “Wash might be able to help you out, see if you can get in touch with him. He gave this to me a while ago, but I’ve already got all the info, you take it.”

“Thanks, I couldn’t get ahold of him earlier,” I muttered.

“Yeah, and he isn’t Detective Washington either. His skill eventually got him hired by the F.B.I. so when you call, ask for Agent Washington,” he said with a smirk.

“You’re kidding? You’re a detective and he works with the feds? Man, I really have lost touch with you too. Maybe someday, we can meet up for a few drinks. Not a cop, fed, and criminal, just three old friends with too much time between them.”

“Sounds like just a pile of shit, Vagabond. But, yeah, sounds like a plan. I’ll call you if I find anything though. And try to get in touch with Wash. I do hope that this works out for you. This Vav guy seems like the perfect match for you, and with how Cock Bite is, the faster we get him back, the better off he’ll be. And all of them will get what’s coming.”

“Tucker, if you know anything about me, it’s what I’m gonna do when we get him back and can give them what they deserve. Vav has been practically tortured by them for years, and they’ll never stop. Burnie Burns will never stop. The only way he’ll be safe is when Burnie is taken out.”

“I’ve known you so long, I know fully what you intend to do. There’s no way I’d try to stop you, I just can’t be involved when it happens. Probably same for Wash if he does help your sorry ass out,” he chuckled. I smiled, even though he couldn’t see through my mask, but he knew I was.

“Ryan,” he said, waiting for me to look up at him, “Vav will be fine, he’s strong. And stubborn if he’s in love with you of all people,” he smirked, “Everything will be fine, trust me on that.”

“I do trust you,” I stated.

“Well if you trust me, take my advice: Number one, get a new mask. That one’s all worn out and about to fall to pieces.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle, he smirked and went on.

“Number two, sounds cliché, but there’s always light at the end of the tunnel. And number three, don’t trust me,” he grinned.

“Thought we’re supposed to trust the cops, Tuck.”

“Yeah, well people that trust cops usually aren’t gang bangers. Get on your way before I arrest you for loitering.”

“Yes, sir, Mr. Detective.”

I hopped on my motor cycle, revved the engine, looking at Tucker as he waved briefly and walked away. I left the construction site, headed back to the shop to talk to the others. They didn’t know about Tucker, and they weren’t going to. He was a good man, jokes around a lot but always has his heart in the right place. I’m glad I have a friend like him, he’s always helped me out when I needed it.

I saved his life, actually it was how we met. We had been pulling a heist and he was caught in the cross fire while trying to stop us. He was hit and fell in the water, as a split second decision, I dove in after him and pulled him onto a deck. He wound wasn’t too bad and he was breathing. I got his name and made a mental note when I had heard Grif calling for me and caught up to them.

After some digging, I found the hospital he was at and paid a visit, we chatted and told him that I pulled him out. He eventually figured out that I was with Fake AH Crew but he never turned me in. He paid his debt to me by keeping our friendship a secret. I do favors for him on occasion when he needs info he can’t get without breaking the law. So in return, if I need help, I usually call him because he knows how to look in the files for info I need. We both know the dangers of working together, but it’s good when things go your way. I eventually met Wash through him, so we have our own little oddball friendship.

*~*~*~*

Later that night, I made it back to the shop. I told Geoff about just having a contact scoping around, looking for any signs of Cock Bite out on the streets. He nodded, telling us that he was going to try to get in touch with some of his own out in the city. He and Adam talked for a long while before Adam went off, making calls. I looked at the laptop, it still shut off, I looked around and saw no one was near it. I knew that they couldn’t watch, not after all we’ve seen already. I took a deep breath and walked over to the desk. Geoff grabbed my hand as I was about to power on the laptop.

“Ryan….no. You’ll only beat yourself up more over it. Gavin is strong, he’ll make it through. You don’t need to torture yourself over this.”

“I know Geoff, I just…I need to know…I need to know that he’s still alive at least. Please Geoff…”

“Fine,” he agreed reluctantly, “none of us have watched since you left…and we can’t stomach to watch anymore. We just know that he’ll be alive when we find him. But if you want to watch more, go in my office and turn the volume down. Understand?

“Yeah, I do..” I muttered. I grabbed the laptop, going to his office and setting it up. I powered it on and lowered the volume. I opened the window to the video feed and soon enough, there he was.

His body covered in cuts, bruises, blood, and who knows what else. I could hear his heavy breathing, gasping for air as he laid on the floor, not bound to anything this time. Burnie was walking around him, kicking him hard. I could hear his cries and moans of pain, and I just felt empty watching it. Geoff was right, I am just torturing myself by watching Gavin. I told him I would protect him and he would be safe, and now there he was, with Burnie once more, being beaten near death. I failed him. I failed myself. How could I live with myself if we don’t get him back? How could I ever accept that I fucked up the best thing in my life by being unable to do the once thing I swore to do: protect him.

I put my face in my hands, breathing shakily as I heard his cries go on and on until he just passed out from the pain. After he did, the feed went dead. Burnie was done for the day. I pulled my phone out and the card Tucker gave me, dialing Wash’s number.

“Yeah, I’m looking for Agent Washington,” I stated on the phone.

“Agent Washington is in a meeting right now, can I take a name and message?” the woman on the phone offered.

“Uh, no thanks. Just tell him an old friend of his and Detective Tucker is needing to get in touch. He can call me whenever he gets the chance. Thanks.”

About half an hour passed when my phone rang, I looked away from the powered down laptop to pick it up.

“Vagabond,” I answered.

“The Mad King still rules his kingdom, I presume?” the voice answered.

“Agent Washington,” I muttered with a smirk.

“Got your call, sorry I couldn’t talk to you myself. I take it that this ain’t no social call. What do you need?” he asked, getting straight to the point.

“I need your help. Cock Bite has one of my men, an important one at that. I won’t get you involved, same with Tuck, but I need whatever info on them you can get…Wash, I thought long and hard before even considering asking you guys for help, but this is way bigger than I imagined…”

“Cock Bite, eh? You really know how to pick them, Ry. I’ll take some time off, I’ll be down in Los Santos in a couple days. I’ll help you out, I know how to blend in with a gang.”

“You don’t have to, you’ve done so much for me already, I just need some information on how they work.”

“I know that, Ryan. But if you’re taking on Cock Bite, you’re not doing it alone, I’ll help you out. Plus, I can talk to Tucker for you as well. I can do this, I know what I need to do. And none of your crew will know who I am, they’ll just think that I’m an old friend, I won’t let them know that I’m a fed.”

“And don’t mention Tucker, then, I don’t even want to risk him being found out by either us or the LSPD. I ain’t fucking his life while he risks it trying to find a guy he doesn’t even know.”

“I get that, Vagabond. I’m not an idiot. I’ll be there when I can, alright?”

I sighed heavily, eventually agreeing.

“Alright, see you later Wash.”

I hung up, gathered my things and left without a word, going back to the abandoned building I’m staying at. I cleaned up a bit before laying on the mattress, closing my eyes before thinking about the events today. First Tucker and now Washington are getting involved in this. I went into this fight thinking Cock Bite was just some small crew that we’ll just take out and get Gavin back. But with everything going on suddenly, seems that we were in for a long battle to get him back.

Just what the hell are we getting ourselves into?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was so lazy about Wash haha, Agent Washington of the FBI, so creative~
> 
> Anyway, let me know what you think! :D


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tensions are starting to get high and some are losing trust in others. But will Ryan finally have lead to get Gavin back?

A couple days had passed and I was sitting in an airport, waiting for Washington. I couldn’t wear my crew clothes, in fear that security would arrest me so I wore something pretty casual. Aside from the few clothes I wear when I’m with my gang, I only really own really fancy clothes so I didn’t have much to pick from when I went to go get my friend. I make sure my hair was a mess and really dirty, I couldn’t let anyone recognize me as James Haywood, so I also put a pair of fake glasses on. I kept my head low and walked around a bit. After a bit, I heard Wash’s plane was arriving so I went to wait for him near the gate. I watched as everyone started shuffling into the airport, watching for a familiar face.

Soon enough, I saw Wash, wearing a basic button down shirt with jeans. I waved him down, greeting him with a tight hug, it had been so long since we last spoke, I did miss him. We walked down to get his luggage since he needed help with it all.

“I still can’t believe you actually came all the way out here for this. I could’ve just used your help back home. Don’t you have family or something?” I asked.

“Yeah, but they’re used to me being gone all the time. When I told them I was helping a friend for a while, they were fine with it. I came because I wanted to, Ryan, if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have come all this way.”

“I guess you’re right,” I sighed, “I just find it pointless. But I am glad you’re here, don’t think I’m not. It’s been a while, after this whole thing we need a night out together with Tucker.”

“Alright,” he chuckled, “Anyway, let’s get to the hotel I’m staying at, then you can introduce me to your friends or whatever you need to do.”

“Right. I did tell them you were coming, they are going to be expecting you later, but they know you’ve had a long flight so they won’t bug you much. And they’re smart guys, no fed tricks, they’ll know them and know who you are.”

“Do you not them to know?” he asked.

“Of course not! I’m a loyal member, but I’m not letting them know I have ties to the F.B.I or L.S.P.D. It would cause problems for all of us. So just don’t do anything that’d make them think you’re a fed. The first thing they’d think would be you’re just a spy but they’d figure out that I knew and get angry with me. I have…other things in my life that they’re getting suspicious about and this would only cause more issues.”

“Oh really?” he questioned, “What kind of things in your life.”

“That doesn’t concern you right now. What does concern you is that when we get there, you’re here to help us find Vav. His name’s actually Gavin and he’s…my boyfriend. I told you everything about what Cock Bite is doing, do you really think you can help me?”

“I know I can help you, one way or another,” Washington smiled, placing a hand on my shoulder as we walked to my car. We loaded his bags up, getting in and driving through the city. We got to his hotel, which was a couple blocks away from where I was currently staying so I was close that we could meet up. I helped him get settled in his room, talking to him about my gang and who everyone was. I showed him photos, told him a few things about them, and answered any questions he had. It was late in the afternoon, early evening, so we decided to head over. I called Geoff, telling him I was bringing him, he told me he’d get everyone there so we could all be introduced.

“Alright, Grif knows we’re coming. What’s your name going to be?” I asked as we prepared to leave.

“I’m just gonna go by Washington,” he shrugged, changing into a long sleeve shirt and cargo pants, pulling out a baseball cap, putting it on.

“That’s fine,” I said, we got in and headed over. When we got there, I noticed he changed his body language, looking slouched, uncaring. We walked inside, everyone was gathered around and talking. It all quieted if not stopped when Wash and I walked in. Geoff came up first, looking him over with a cold stare. Wash didn’t seemed fazed at all until Geoff offered his hand, shaking it.

“Name’s Grif, I’m in charge here,” he stated, pointing to the others, “That’s Brown Man, Mogar, Jack, and Adam.”

“What’s up?” Wash greeted. I looked at him, shocked by how well he changed himself, figuring it was a lot of practice from being out in the field.

“So, how long have you known Ryan here?” Michael asked, crossing his arms.

“Eh, for a while. He helps me out, I help him, not much to it. If you got a job for me, I get it done. And Vagabond here wants me helping you get info on Cock Bite. That right?” he smirked. A couple of the guys gave him an odd look, but seemed alright with him.

“Just what exactly do you do?” Jack questioned, looking him over.

“I’m just a gun for hire. Freelance, you know? I don’t tend to stay with one group for long, so long as they got the cash anyway.”

“So….is Ryan paying you to help us?” Ray piped up a bit from his seat.

“No, I don’t charge him since he’s a talented friend of mine. Aside from helping me get tools or ammo, he doesn’t pay a thing for me to help.”

“Never got your name, by the way. What do we call you?” Geoff asked.

“Oh, sorry ‘bout that. The name’s Washington, or Wash,” he shrugged.

After a while, Wash said he was going to leave and look around town. He told me when the others weren’t around that he was gonna make some calls to the F.B.I office here in Los Santos to find any info on Burnie. I chose to spend the rest of my day fixing up the cars and bikes here at the shop. I fixed a variety of problems, but decided to fix some of them tomorrow as well.

I took a break from fixing Ray’s motorcycle to get some water. I laid my tools down and made my way to the door going inside. I reached for the door handle and stopped, hearing some muffled talking. I leaned in, listening to whoever was speaking, I could hear Michael for sure and I think Geoff. I heard them mention Wash so I listened in for a moment.

“Do you really think you can trust this Wash guy, Grif?” Michael asked, “I just got a feeling about him….I don’t know how to explain it. I want to find Gavin as much as everyone else, I just don’t know about this guy…”

“I know, Michael. But Ryan trusts him, we should give him a chance. He knows his way around things, I’m sure he’ll be able to help us. He’s a friend of Ryan’s, so we know we can trust him.”

“You sure about that?” Michael pressed, “Frankly, I’m finding it harder to trust Ryan. I know Church likes to mess with people, but what he wondered about Ryan…about if he was really who he said he was. He just—Church looked just as curious about it as we were.”

“Michael…” Geoff said, “I agree that lately it’s been hard to tell if I actually still trust Ryan. But he has been more than willing to do anything to find Gavin. He said he’d talk to me about it after we get him back. I can see why you’d be questioning it, I would too. But finding Gav is what matters…we can worry about him later if we need to.”

I couldn’t really hear them when they moved away from the door. After a moment, I eventually went inside, saw them looking at me. I acted as if I didn’t see them, getting the water I wanted. I nodded towards them as I got my drink. Michael walked away as I received a phone call, it was Wash, Geoff stayed near since I told him who was calling.

“Vagabond,” I answered.

“Hey it’s Wash. Got some bad news, Ry. I called a the F.B.I branch here, asking them to get any info on Cock Bite, that I was working on my own case, but the branch in Liberty City they called pretty much has nothing on them. Frankly, it seems you guys know more about Cock Bite than we do.”

“Definitely not what I was wanting to hear, but there’s really nothing we can do. Just get back here tomorrow and we’ll start working on a plan with Grif and the others. Get some rest and we’ll see you then,” I hung up, sighing heavily as I put my phone back into my pocket, looking at Geoff as he studied me.

“No good news, I presume?”

“Not right now…Wash called some…old friends. But they got nothing on Cock Bite, but he’ll keep them digging.”

“Who are these ‘friends’ of Washington’s?” Geoff asked, I glanced at him with a careful gaze. He was watching for my reaction, wanting to see how I act with his questions. I bet it was partly because of Michael starting to distrust me. I scratched the back of my head, giving a puzzled look.

“Not sure. I’ve never met them. Wash keeps his contacts a secret and I don’t ask questions. It’s best to just let him do his job and not interfere.”

“And just what exactly is his job, Ryan?” Geoff pressed harder, keeping a close eye on me.

“His job is to help us find Gavin. And if able to, kill all of Cock Bite,” I muttered, turning to face him, keeping calm, “this isn’t a social call, just business Geoff. I know you probably don’t like Washington cause he isn’t one of your contacts. But he’s a good man, a smart man,” I met his eyes, crossing my arms slightly.

“Alright,” he accepted, “I’ll trust Washington for now. I’ll trust your judgment for now, Ryan. Don’t make me regret this.”

He walked away, leaving me alone. I took a deep breath and ran my hand through my hair. Michael not trusting me and Geoff starting to have his own doubts is not helping at all. I fished my phone out, calling Wash.

“Sorry to bother you. Just know that things might be tense. A bit of conflict of interest. I’ll try to keep things calm here when I can. Keep at it, we’ll be in touch later. I’ll call if I happen to find anything, you do the same,” I hung up.

I looked around the empty room, jaw clenched. I had to think of something, I can’t let everything fall apart, not when we still have to find Gavin.

*~*~*~*

It’s been about a week since Washington got here to help us. He hasn’t been able to find anything and neither has Tucker. None of Geoff’s contacts could locate Burnie or any of his men. The only way we know they still have Gavin is from the video feed. I could’ve been wasting a lot of time, they could’ve been out of the city when Caboose first brought us the laptop. I looked at what little info we had on them that we originally got from Adam, who went back to Liberty City to scope things out when I told him about us probably chasing our tails here in Los Santos. Geoff wasn’t too happy that Adam left, but he agreed to our reasoning to.

Michael was losing more and more trust in me. He usually avoided Wash and I, Geoff’s confidence in Wash was starting to slip since he hasn’t been able to find anything, either. Wash told me to go looking around town, but I knew he just wanted me to get some air, get away from everything for a while. As I was about to leave, Geoff stopped me.

“I don’t want you out on your own. Michael’s going with you.”

“I’m not going,” Michael interrupted, “I’m staying here to work.”

Geoff sighed, telling Ray to go instead. He agreed and we left, I let him drive, since I wasn’t focusing enough to be able to drive. We sat in silence for a short while until he finally spoke.

“Ry…what’s going on with everyone? Everything is just…so different now. Geoff is extremely bitter most of the time, no one really talks anymore, and Michael….he seems to flat out hate you for some reason. Your friend Washington is doing all he can to help us, but when Adam left to go check things out, it only seemed to get worse…” he trailed off, I took a deep breath, scratching the back of my head.

“Things really have been going wrong, huh, Ray?” I smirked a bit, “Truth be told…I have a feeling I know exactly what’s going on here. Gavin and him being involved with Cock Bite. This whole mess started because of him.”

“Wait, are you…blaming Gavin for all this!? What the fuck, Gavin is held up somewhere getting the shit kicked out of him and you’re fucking telling me it’s his fault that this is happening!?”

“No of course not!” I shouted, “I didn’t mean it like that. What I meant was his past involvement with them. We’re in way over our heads with this, with what Burnie Burns is actually capable of.”

“But Gavin never told us-”

“I would never blame Gavin for this. None of it. And now with what’s been happening, I can see why he would keep something like this a secret. I…I just know that he didn’t tell us so he could keep us safe. I thought this would be easy…find them, kill them, bring Gavin back and he’d be safe again. But with how everything is going to shit, especially between Michael, Geoff, Wash and I, we need to do something and soon. Before everything we’ve been working on falls apart.”

Ray nodded as we drove on, I took a moment to myself to gather my thoughts.

“Ray…Gavin means the world to me. I will never stop looking for him. Never. I will go searching the whole world a thousand times and not give up. I’m going to find Gavin, I’ve vowed to keep that promise and not mess it up like the promise I made to keep him safe.”

“Alright, and you have me on your side, I won’t stop looking either. We’ll get him back, Ryan.”

I asked Ray to take me to where I was staying while we searched. He walked around while I gathered a few things. I heard him shuffling around but paid no attention to it.

“Dude, what place did you rob to get these clothes? I can tell they’re the real thing, I know fakes when I see them. Nice wallet too,” he said, picking it up and looking at it. My whole body froze when he didn’t say anything else, I slowly looked over at him. He was staring at the I.D. I had with me. Fuck, I never noticed that my actual wallet was brought here. I just stood up and waited for him, I watched as he looked at me. Without saying a work, I pulled off my mask, the grease paint smearing out from around my eyes. I watched as he stared at my features and looked back down at my wallet, I sighed.

“Ray…let me explain,” I started.

“This is why Burnie is so interested in you…he figured you had some form of secret identity. Never thought it would be true or that you’re actually some millionaire brat from the Haywood family,” he paused, “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“You think Geoff would let some ‘famous’ brat join the crew? And I was worried he’d only let me in to be a way to some big money or he wouldn’t because of who I am. I joined because I wanted to get away from my life, a life I never enjoyed. I’d rather be a homeless gang banger than some spoiled rich brat. Sure I run my own business, but that does nothing for my reputation. That’s why I created Ryan Vagabond, to have an actual life where my choices actually had impacts in some form or another.”

Ray didn’t really say much, but agreed not to mention anything to the others, but I did tell him that Gavin knew as well.

“But he didn’t say anything when Church…”

“No, he didn’t. I’m grateful that he didn’t say anything, I owe Gavin a lot and him still trying to protect me makes me realize I owe him so much more than I could repay. But I can’t thank you enough for keeping my secret…I’ll definitely owe you big time for this.”

“You don’t have to owe me anything, we all have our secrets,” Ray smirked. I finished up at my place, getting what I needed and we left. We decided to head back to the shop and once we had, we heard some shouting from the inside. I motioned for Ray to wait while I move to the door to listen. I heard our crew talking, well shouting, to one another. I listened a bit more, not hearing Wash but I heard someone else. I drew my gun, just in case, keeping it behind me and I heard Ray draw his and we went in.

Inside, Geoff, Jack, and Michael stared at Ray and I. I kept my gun held close for a moment but everyone relaxed and I put my gun away.

“What’s going on in here?” I asked, Ray coming in behind me.

“Come with me,” Geoff ordered, and I followed. He took me to the garage and I went in behind him, gasping when I saw Tucker of all people sitting in a chair, wrists tied to the arms.

“What’s this about?” I asked, Tucker looking up at me. Geoff came between us, facing him.

“This cop came crawling around, asking about you. He said he had some info for you,” Geoff growled, turning to me, “See if this is even true, what the fuck are you doing talking to cops!?”

“Did he tell you what he knew?” I challenged, Geoff gave me a hard look.

“Don’t you dare turn this on me, Vagabond. Tell me why you’re working with the cops! NOW, Ryan!”

“I don’t work with the L.S.P.D, Geoff. I saved his life, so he owed me. I told him helping me with finding Gavin would repay that dept. He was supposed to call a disposable cell of mine and I would have just met with him. Just let me talk to him and he’ll get out of here,” I told Geoff. I hated lying to him, but Tucker didn’t need a target on his back from the Fake AH Crew.

“Ryan, you have been walking some very thin ice here. You better know what the fuck you’re doing, I am not putting up with this shit,” Geoff growled as he left me and Tucker alone. After a moment, I looked at him.

“You’re stupid for coming here…I warned you not to get too close or to just come on your own. Why didn’t you call me?”

“I’m sorry, Ry. I wasn’t thinking, I just knew I had to get to you right away.”

“What could be so important that you’d risk this? They could’ve killed you!” I shouted.

“I think Washington and I found where Gavin is!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actual plot progression! Yay~


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan finally has a lead. But even with it, will it be too late?

*~*Gavin’s POV*~*

I coughed and gagged at the taste of blood in my mouth, whimpering as every movement my body made sent waves of pain all over. Just breathing was becoming harder to do, my chest hurt so bad. I looked up as Burnie was all sweaty from today, I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, my leg throbbing in pain from where it was broken.

My lower back and bottom sore from today’s….events. I couldn’t meet his eyes, tears stinging my own. That was something he’d started a couple days ago. At least I think a couple days ago. I had no idea how long I’ve been here. With no windows or anything, I had no idea. Burnie never said anything either. I looked up as he finished fixing up his pants.

“Gavin, do you know how long you have been here with me?” He asked, I whimpered and shook my head.

“I d-don’t, Burnie…” I whispered.

“Shame, I lose track of time when I have fun with you,” he purred, “But at least a good couple weeks, Gavin.”

He smirked as he walked around me, tilting my head up.

“It’s been so long, I’m surprised Vagabond hasn’t tried to come get you. Maybe you were just a fuck toy to him, he doesn’t seem too interested in getting you back. He of all people should be out looking for you. I would have thought he’d at least find you by now…maybe I overestimated his abilities…” he pondered.

“Y-you’re wr-rong. H-he loves m-me,” I whispered softly, Burnie spun around, slapping me across the face.

“He ‘loves’ you!? Ha! Don’t make stupid jokes like that, they’re cruel,” he smirked.

“He won’t stop…he won’t stop…” I muttered, I could sense him getting angry, and as expected, a hard punch came across my face. He punched me a few more times before begging.

“NO BURNIE STOP!! That isn’t what I meant!” I cried, and he did, I whimpered and looked up at him, “i-it’s true h-he won’t stop…but he will! H-he will if…if..”

“‘If’ what, Gavin?”

“I-if I go back with you…Burnie please. Just let me go back, I won’t run away anymore…” I sobbed, Ryan wouldn’t stop, but if he knew I was going back on my own, h-he’ll stop. W-we can just be together, l-like we used to. Please Burnie, I’ll stop fighting, I’ll…I’ll go back home with you.”

Burnie looked at me, seeing how genuine about it I was, I couldn’t look away, and he sighed.

“Well, I have been getting bored teaching you your lessons,” he said, “And frankly, I’ve been getting bored of you. You’re not really fun anymore. Why would I bring you back home when I have no use for you?”

My heart started racing, what does that mean for me? I looked up at Burnie, internally begging for him to tell me more on what his intentions are, but when he wouldn’t, I dared to ask.

“What are you going to do with me, then? You’re not going to let me go, are you?”

“You’re smarter than you lead on. Glad to know that you understand what’s going to happen. Good night Gavin, it was fun while it lasted,” he chuckled, lifting a bat, swinging hard and hitting the back of my head. Everything was spinning, I could hear a bit before I was swallowed up in darkness.

“Sarge, prepare the truck. And make sure it’s at least 30 below 0. I need it cold enough so he’s dead before you get to the docks. There’re some weights on the dock that they use when they fish. Tie his body to that so he goes down. Don’t fuck this up…and to make sure he does freeze, just keep him in his boxers. We can burn his clothes later. Now get him loaded up. I have…a call to make. They need to know that Gavin’s coming home of his own free will.”

I remember feeling angry. They’re just gonna kill me off after all, and make sure my friends, no, my family stops all together to find me. They’ll think I’m going back…I wanted to scream and shout, but I couldn’t, just falling into darkness.

*~*Ryan’s POV*~*

“You….you what?” My mind was spinning a hundred times. D-did I hear the right?

“Wash and I think we found where Gavin is…” Tucker repeated, “I know it’s been quiet for a while. But we were driving around together when I wasn’t on my shift, and we saw some of Cock Bite’s members loitering around.”

“How do you know that where they were hanging out is where they could be keeping Gavin?” I asked softly.

“Because they were at the abandoned slaughter house that is a few miles from the beach. That place has been abandoned for years. It’s the perfect place to keep him. The walls are super thick so not much noise can get out. Especially if they’re in the basement or in the middle in general.”

I couldn’t think right, my whole body was just stiff. Gavin could still be here in Los Santos. And we could know where he is right now. After taking a moment to relax, I pulled out a pocket knife and cut Tucker’s binds. He understood why I told Geoff what I said, so he agreed to play along. I “dragged” him out of the garage, standing in front of the others.

“Detective Tucker here told me that he think he’s found where Gavin is. We have an agreement that if he isn’t there, he’ll still help out until Gavin’s found. Then after that, he won’t be bothering us again,” I told everyone, then took Tucker to the door throwing him out.

“Get out of here. You’re lucky they didn’t kill you. Next time do as you’re told,” I said coldly, smirking softly at him as he left. I went back in, Geoff immediately asking for more details.

“Tucker told me that he saw Cock Bite hanging out around the abandoned slaughter house. Chances are Gavin’s being held there. It’d be the perfect place to hold up while here since been abandoned for so long. I’ll get Wash back here so he and I can go scope it out.”

“Sounds like a plan, but you and Washington are not going alone. I’m still not sure I trust him so Michael is going with you and him,” Geoff declared.

“Geoff,” Michael started to protest.

“Fucking suck it up, Michael. You are going with those two,” Geoff glared. Ray piped up.

“I could go? I don’t mind going.”

“Ugh, fine,” Geoff groaned, “I still want Michael to go, though. The four of you would be good than just three. You’re all great shots so you four go looking around.”

“Alright. I’ll call Wash and tell him to meet us here. I need to…check something,” I muttered the end, Geoff nodded. He knew it was to check on Gavin, to make sure he was okay. Well, okay in the sense that he was still alive at this point. Seeing his beaten and broken body tore me to shreds every time I checked on him. I checked to see how he was and I cringed, they had broken one of his legs. It was mainly internal since nothing was sticking out but his leg bent at a wrong angle. I could see the tears streaming down his bloodstained face. I couldn’t help but touch the screen, wanting to hold him to me.

“Just hold on a bit longer. We’re coming, Gav. I love you so much…you’ll be back home safe.”

Washington got here not long after I powered down the laptop. He, Ray, and I climbed into one of our cars. Michael was still angry about having to go out with me mainly, so he said he was taking his bike. The three of us drove us, Michael staying behind. As we drove on, I glanced at Ray through the rearview mirror then over to Wash next to me. Ray knew who I really was, and I can tell he would stay by me on my side, so I cleared my throat to get their attentions.

“Guys, we need to talk. Wash? Ray knows about who I really am,” I started. Wash looked at me wide eyed, turning back before nodding.

“Is that all?” he asked.

“No, I want you to know that I trust Ray…he’s on my side with this, so…”

“Ry, what’s going on?” Ray questioned. Wash studying my features, I could tell he figured out what I was about to say.

“Ray? Washington isn’t….he isn’t a gun for hire. He actually….he’s a close friend of mine that works for the F.B.I.”

“He what!?” Ray sounded shocked, looking at Wash, who just chuckled.

“Yeah, I’m a fed. I do a lot of field work so I know how to blend in. But with Michael not trusting Ryan lately and Geoff having his doubts, it was starting to get hard for me since I couldn’t find anything. We don’t have much on Cock Bite. To be honest, you guys knew a lot more than we did.”

“You kept all this from Geoff, Ryan?” Ray turned to me.

“I had to…to protect Washington, and myself. Honestly…at this point, you don’t have to keep this a secret if you feel you need to tell Geoff. But if you do tell him, Wash is taking the next flight out of here. And I won’t help you find him,” I said dryly. Of course I would want him to keep our secret with us, but he’s already kept the one about my identity, I don’t want to force him to keep anymore.

“Ry…these are some big secrets you’ve been keeping…” Ray said hesitatingly, I nodded, waiting for him to tell me he would tell Geoff.

“Ry, Wash, as loyal as I am to Geoff…we’re so close to getting Gavin and I completely trust you both so…I won’t tell him. It isn’t the time, not now. If we have to talk about it with Geoff, do it later.”

“I promise to keep you out of it,” I told him, “It’s the least I could do for you doing this for us.”

“I’m not doing it for you, I’m doing it for Gavin.”

I smirked, nodding. We made it to the slaughter house, my throat going dry. We parked a good distance away so we could save time walking there and still be able to make a quick escape. Michael parked next to us. I took a few deep breaths while in the car. I pulled my mask of, quickly applying black grease paint around my eyes before putting mask back on, to make me look a bit more scary with it on. I pulled out my silenced pistol. We were up against the wall, moving slowly. We were about to spread out to find a way in when my phone buzzed. I stopped the others and checked, it was Geoff.

“What is it? We’re here and we’re trying to find a way in,” I whispered to him, listening closely as the others kept watch.

“Ryan, I got a call from Burnie…he said they he and the others left. Gavin included. He…he went back. He said that he chose to go back on his own. He’s gone, Ry.”

“I don’t believe that for a second, Geoff. Gavin wouldn’t go back with them,” I hissed back.

“Ryan, Gavin has been with them for so long. He either did choose to go back, or he knows what we’re dealing with. I want him back with us as much as you. But I know when to call it. We couldn’t find him while he was here. What makes you think we could find him if we even went to Liberty City? It’s over…”

“No, I’m not giving up. If anything, I’ll try to find a lead inside. Please Geoff, come here with Jack and help us…please…”

“Alright, we’ll be there soon, just don’t keep your hopes up.”

I hung up, telling everything to the others. Michael went into a rage, grabbing me and shoving me into the wall.

“This is all your fault, you asshole! Ever since you got together with Gavin, everything went to shit! He was kidnapped cause you fucked him! If it weren’t for you, he’d still be with us!”

Ray grabbed Michael, pulling him off, covering his mouth, “Shut up, you idiot! This isn’t Ryan’s fault! Church has been watching Gav for years! He was gonna come back eventually!! Keep your cool so we can look around!”

We decided to split up, Wash and I together as Ray and Michael went the other way. Washington and I went towards the back, slowly moving along the wall. We heard the rumble of a truck near the back, we stopped around the corner. Carefully, we peaked around to see who was outside, we saw Burnie outside, talking to one of his men. From what Adam told us, that was “Sarge.” We tried to listen in, but it was hard to hear what they were saying, so we had no idea. Sarge had gotten into the truck and started driving away as Burnie went back into the building. Wash and I hid in the bushes as he pulled away, we looked at each other and started moving slowly until the truck was out of sight. I just had this gut feeling that I had to follow him. Wash and I got to the vehicles, I looked up at him.

“I need to go after him. Something isn’t right, why would he go out into the town by himself? And of all trucks, a meat truck? I just don’t like this,” I said. Michael had left his keys in his bike for if we needed to leave, same with my keys in the ignition. I sent a quick message to Michael, looked at Wash.

“You stay here, they’ll need your help until Geoff and Jack get here,” I told him, but Wash shook his head.

“No, they’ll be here soon enough. Plus Ray and Michael are smart, they know how strong they are, they’ll be fine. I’m going with you, no arguments. Let’s go.”

I started the bike and Wash climbed on, we sped off after the truck but kept a safe distance away so he wouldn’t suspect us following him. He drove all around town, sometimes going down the same roads a couple times. Sarge isn’t an idiot if he’s with Burnie, he isn’t lost, he’s stalling. What for, though, I have no idea.

Eventually he drove down to the beach, going towards the fishing docks. We stopped a block away, leaving the bike as we quickly ran towards the docks, we saw him parked at the end but he was just sitting in there. With all the time wasted, the sun had started to set and was getting dark, I looked to Wash as we ran.

“He’s waiting until nightfall for whatever he’s going to do. We need to get him to talk, come on!”

We got to the docks and ducked behind some bins. We peaked around and gradually made our way to the end of the dock. I drew my gun, Wash with his, as we came up behind the truck. I nodded to Wash and he went around to the passenger side. He banged on the side before moving back. I carefully watched as Sarge got out of the truck and walked to the front. I quickly moved up behind him, wrapping my arm around his throat and pointed the gun to his head as he struggled against me.

“What are you doing here!? Where is Gavin Free? And don’t you dare tell me he went back with Burnie because I know he didn’t! He would never go back with him!!” I shouted, Washington behind me, just watching.

“Th-that useless kid!? N-no, h-he didn’t go back. Be he ain’t here anymore,” Sarge growled, “th-the little fucker is dead. Burnie killed him, they’re at the slaughter house, you can find his body there.”

“Then why are you here? Why are you here on the docks!?” I shouted, pressing the gun harder to his head.

“T-to receive a payment..” he tried making an excuse. I kept questioning him over and over for at least 20 minutes, but I knew he’d never talk. I shoved him to the ground and shot him. His body jerked before stopping all movement. Thankfully my gun was silenced so no one noticed. I looked to Wash as he opened up the truck’s door, looking inside. I was on the driver’s side and he was at the passenger. We looked for any papers or clues as to why he was really here. We were about to leave when I noticed the temperature gauge on the dash. Puzzled, I looked to Washington.

“Hey, does this look right to you? A freezer doesn’t need to be this cold. Is the damn thing broken?” I asked, still looking around.

“Does it really matter? We’re not here to fix a broken freezer, “ Washington sighed, I shook my head.

“I know, just…talking out loud…”

“Well while we’re on the subject, see if there’s anything back there while I finish looking at these papers.”

I got out of the front of the truck going around to the back. I saw that it was locked and was about to try to unlock it when Wash called back again.

“Hey Ry, come look at what I found,” he said, I walked over to see him holding a plastic bag, “It has some clothes in it, weird huh?”

“So what, Sarge brought a change of clothes?” I asked, but looked at the clothes closer, eyes widening, “Wait a minute, let me see those.”

“They look too small for someone Sarge’s size, I wonder why he would have these.”

I only glanced at Wash before I grabbed the bag from him. I pulled the clothes out and took in a deep breath.

“Ryan? What’s the matter?”

I barely heard him as I looked at the fabric in my hands. This was the outfit that Gavin was wearing the day he was taken, and all he wore when he was tortured by Burnie, I looked up at Wash.

“Th-these are Gavin’s…why does Sarge have them!?”

I went over things in my mind as to why they were here in this bag. I almost started pacing until I heard a motor starting up, it pulled me out of my thoughts as I looked for the source. It was the motor for the freezer, and just looking at it for a moment made me realize something about why the temperature was set so low.

And it made my blood run cold.

“FUCK!!!” I screamed as I ran to the back of the freezer, pulling at the lock on the door until just pulling my gun out and shooting the lock off.

“Ryan, what are you doing!?”

I ignored him as I fumbled the broken lock off and started to lift the door up, Washington asking again, I looked at him before struggling to get the door up, the extreme cold practically freezing the door shut.

“Isn’t it obvious!? They’re freezing him to death! GAVIN’S IN HERE!!!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there is at least two more chapters to this that I sorta have worked out in my head. And I'm pretty sure I'm not doing a sequel, but you never know. Though if I did, it would be fairly short, like, only a couple chapters.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan does everything he can to save Gavin's life.

I struggled to lift the door, the extreme cold causing the door to stick, I cursed in frustration. Wash came up next to me, grabbing hold of the door, helping me lift it up.

“Come on, damn thing!” I growled.

The door groaned in protest until it finally relented and slowly went up. I climbed in and looked around, my immediate first thought was that it was empty. But then I noticed a lightly colored sheet crammed in the corner, I slowly made my way to the back of the freezer. Kneeling down next to the bundle, with shaky breaths, I pulled the sheet away, holding in a gasp when I saw Gavin’s face white as snow pressed against the floor. I carefully pulled the sheet off all the way, looking over all his injuries.

“G-Gavin….” I whispered. I carefully cupped his cheek in my hand, but when he didn’t so much as flinch, I knew I had to do something and quick. I carefully lifted him up into my arms, his body stiff from the cold. I carried him out, laying him on the ground. I needed to start warming him up, thankfully the wooden dock was still warm. I pulled off my jacket, laying it over him, I pressed my fingers to his neck, not feeling a pulse.

“Fuck, he doesn’t have a pulse….and his isn’t breathing either…” I quickly pulled out my phone, tossing it to Wash.

“Call the others! Tell them we found Gavin! Then after that call 911!! If Gavin has even the smallest chance, we’re taking it! Hurry!!”

Wash started calling the others, and I started CPR on Gavin, but he wasn’t responding.

“Come on Gavin…don’t do this to me…please,” I muttered to him as I kept trying to get his heart pumping on its own again, “I know I’ve been really late getting you back, but I’m here now. Please don’t make me break another promise to you…I promised I’d keep you safe and I failed. Then I promised that I’d bring you back home after I got you back. Please don’t make me a liar…Gavin please come back to me…I love you so much.”

I kept going with the CPR, constantly checking to see if he was breathing on his own. Eventually he did start breathing on his own, but his pulse was still very weak. Wash handed me his own jacket when I asked him for it, trying to warm him up more.

Only a few minutes had passed. I could hear sirens faintly, I looked up at Wash and he nodded.

“They won’t know I was here, and I’m taking this with me,” he said as he pulled my mask off, then using a cloth and wiped off most of the black grease paint off.

“It’s the best I can do. Get cleaned up as much as you can, I’ll meet you at the hospital later with the others,” he said as he took off. As the sirens got closer, I used the inside of my shirt to get the last of the paint off my face. I pulled Gavin up into my arms, letting his head rest against my chest. I looked down at him, holding him close, feeling how cold he was still. I saw how his face was caked in blood, it all dried up, looking days old if not weeks. I pressed my lips to his forehead, letting a tear roll down my cheek.

He was finally back in my arms, but I already might lose him for good, and no matter what I do he could still die. And I would truly be alone.

I looked out to the roads as an ambulance and fire truck pulled up at the end of the docks near the roads, watching them all running towards us. As I watched them with an almost blank stare, cold fingers lightly touched my face. I looked down to their owner and saw Gavin, eyes barely open, looking up at me. His eyes were dull and he looked exhausted. He opened his mouth, lips cracking with the movement as he tried to speak, his hand still on my face. I quietly shushed him when he kept trying to talk.

“It’s okay, Gav, it’s okay…I’m here and you’re in my arms…I’m gonna take care of you, okay?” my voice cracked at the end, and even with his life on the line, Gavin only showed concern for me. He stared worriedly as I choked on a couple sobs, more tears rolling down my cheek. Despite being mostly uncoordinated, Gavin wiped them away.

As the paramedics got closer, I smiled at Gavin, whispering “I love you” to him. He smiled weakly at me, but then his body relaxed all of a sudden, his eyes rolling back as he fell unconscious against me. I caught his hand as it fell from my face, holding it closely and kissing it gently. I never wanted to let him go again, that the firefighters had to hold me back when the paramedics started working on Gavin.

After I had calmed down, I went with them into the ambulance, riding along. All I could do was hold the two jackets I used to help him. I watched as they all started using blankets and heating pads to warm him up, one of them was a woman was helping him stay breathing. She looked at me, seeing how disconnected I was becoming, and spoke to me.

“You know, you did the right thing with using the ground and the jackets to start warming him up. If he stayed in that meat truck for any longer, he would be dead. Thankfully he as someone watching over him,” she said, pulling my attention.

“I just hope it was enough,” I whispered.

*~*~*

The ride to the hospital was not a desired one. Gavin flat lined twice, thankfully it wasn’t long at all. But that still does something to you, watching someone as their heart literally stopped. I did my best to not yell out of frustration or try to do anything since they knew what they needed to do. As we pulled up, he flat lined a third time, but he wasn’t coming out of it again. As they wheeling him into the hospital, the woman that was “breathing” for him was the one performing CPR on him since she was able to do so while he was transported. I could see the guys inside, and they all watched in horror as Gavin went passed them. Geoff looked back to see me trudging in, a couple doctors crowding me, asking me questions about Gavin. I answered what questions that I could but it wasn’t much. Geoff came up to me, hands on my shoulders.

“I can’t fucking believe it,” he muttered, “h-he’s alive….Gavin…”

I pulled out of his grasp, my own mind still spinning, only to be hugged tightly by Washington, everyone surrounding me, asking about Gav. I tried to answer what I could, but it seemed like forever until a doctor came back, I stood as he approached us.

“Is Gavin alright?” I asked, he only frowned and sighed.

“There was a lot of internal damage…I’ve never seen that much before on a guy that survived. And him being nearly frozen to death didn’t help at all. He is in no way out of danger, the fact that he is even alive is a miracle in itself.”

“Can we see him?” I asked quietly.

“No, no one aside from family will be allowed to see him for now.”

My jaw clenched, I wasn’t gonna let this happen, no after everything we’ve been through. I at least need to see him.

“I…I am Gavin’s family,” I said, the doctor didn’t look too convinced though.

“Alright, how are you related to him?” he asked.

I glanced at the others, looking back.

“I’m his….fiancé. Gavin and I were engaged a couple months back, before….all this when he was kidnapped. Please…let me see him,” I begged.

After a moment, he relented.

“Alright, but only you. Your friends will have to wait for now. Come on,” he motioned me to follow, I nodded to the guys, motioning to my phone as I followed the doctor. We made our way to his room, he let me be alone with him and I thanked him. I walked over to the bed, looking at Gavin as he slept peacefully for once. I quietly walked over to the chair next to the bed and sat down, I heard the soft beeping of the heart monitor, watching him breathe.

I had to have been there for hours, all night, I looked out the window, the sun rising. I called Geoff, telling him I would tell him everything since Gavin was back. He told me it was unnecessary, that he didn’t want to hear anything about it. I sighed and agreed, hanging up, the doctor walking in as I hung up.

“Take it you didn’t sleep well?” he asked, checking on Gavin.

“Not really, no. Just been watching Gavin sleep. I uh, I did all the time when we were together, it would make me think about how lucky I was to be with him…” I muttered, pretending we had been together for years.

“I would say he’s lucky to have someone like you. But I’m afraid I’m not sure we’ll get to tell him that,” he said sadly.

“What do you mean?”

“After operating on Gavin, we did some tests. There is some minor brain damage, nothing serious, but from what we can gather, Gavin is in a coma. And we’re not sure if he’ll ever wake up. All those injuries both internally, externally, and even more so, the emotional trauma of it all, there’s just so much wrong with him right now.”

I sat there quiet, taking it all in. He might never wake up again, I sighed sadly, nodding. I could feel tears starting to burn my eyes, I grabbed Gavin’s hand, my thumb lightly rubbing the top, feeling his soft skin.

“You’re Ryan, aren’t you?” the doctor asked, I looked up confused at him.

“What? Yes I’m Ryan.”

“Before we took him in for surgery, he regained conscious for a short time. We tried questioning him but all he would say was ‘Ryan’ and look around the room like he was trying to find someone. He repeated that name just a couple times until he passed out again. So, you must be the Ryan he was talking about.”

He excused himself, leaving. He did tell me that the others could start visiting in a week or so, just so Gavin can heal a while on his own aside from me being here.

I never left his side during that week alone. The others would try calling but I didn’t answer, I just held Gavin’s hand and just let the hours tick by. By the end of the week, the guys came to visit, they were all extremely quiet, just staring at us as I held onto Gavin.

“Ryan…it’s been a week. Letting yourself suffer isn’t going to help. Come on, we’re getting you something to eat. Someone can stay here while we’re gone,” Geoff came up to me, gently putting a hand to my shoulder.

“I can stay,” Michael offered, but he smiled at me softly. I smirked a bit, he wasn’t mad at me anymore, he wasn’t trying to avoid me. He just wants to stay with his friend. I stood up and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Michael…I…I’m…” I struggled to say, but he only smirked.

“You don’t need to apologize, you know. If either of us should, it should be me. We’ve been working together for years, I should’ve trusted you more.”

I nodded, the others pulling me out as Michael took a seat in the chair I was glued to all week. The others took me out to some restaurant, ordering big meals, making me order some of the largest since I hadn’t eaten much all week aside from vending machine snacks and sodas. When our food arrived, I almost couldn’t bring myself to eat, it wasn’t that I was not hungry, I was starving, I just had so much on my mind.

“Ryan, Gavin is going to be fine,” Jack said, seeing my hesitation to eat, knowing why.

“Yeah, he has you, so everything will be alright,” Ray added.

“He’s in a coma…” I whispered. The others looked at each other, then back to me, “They don’t know if he’ll wake up again, not with all his injuries, or where he is emotionally.”

“He….he’s in a coma?” Geoff asked and I nodded.

“Well,” he said, “then he has a lot of rest to catch up on. It may take a while, but he’s strong enough, he’ll wake up.”

“When?” I asked, voice cracking in sadness.

“That’s for Gavin to decide,” Washington said, joining in, “he loves you, Ryan. He knows that he’ll need to come back if he wants to be with you.”

I nodded and eventually started eating my food. But I did have some other questions.

“What happened at the slaughter house after Wash and I left? Did you guys find anything? Or anyone?”

“Yeah, we found Church and two of his guys,” Ray answered, “Michael and I waited for Geoff and Jack to get there before we went in after them. We were mostly successful, one of his guys, Simmons was killed and Caboose was injured pretty badly. Church got away though, but this past week while you were with Gavin we were looking for him, but so far nothing. He might be in the city, or he could’ve gone back to Liberty City since he’s lost two men and his third is injured.”

I nodded, Wash telling how he’d been helping them out. Hopefully they could find him so I could be sure that Gavin was really safe now.

*~*~*~*

Afterwards we went back, we all sat around him, quietly talking to each other and joking around. It felt mostly normal to do so, maybe it made Gavin feel comfortable that he was with his friends again. That things would start becoming more normal once more.

The only thing I didn’t like was him having a tube down his throat since he couldn’t breathe on his own until his ribs were healed a little more that it wouldn’t ache for him to do so on his own. After spending the whole day with us, the others left, leaving me with Gavin once more. I was exhausted, tired, and just worn out. I felt frustrated, angry, even confused about this. But most of all, I was happy.

Happy that Gavin was home safe with us, with me. I was happy that I could hold his hand, tell him how much I loved him.

And I’ll be most happy when he wakes up so I can tell him so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So with how I've been writing lately, I should be finishing up this in probably two more chapters. :) If you ever have any fic ideas, drop a prompt at nattiebug14.tumblr.com and maybe I'll be able to write something~ I've already been getting ideas for fics but you never know when I might need a hand!


	22. Chapter 22

*~*~*Three Years Later*~*~*

It had been a long three years for me. I would visit him every day and stay for hours at a time. And every day when I would come visit, I would bring a rose with me. I bought the largest vase I could find, and with every passing day, I added a new flower to it. It quickly filled up, and as the older flowers started to die, I’d take them out so only the fresher flowers would be there. I guess someone could see that and say it was the biggest bouquet of flowers they’d ever seen. But to me, it was just me bringing a flower for him every day, to show that he was not alone, that he had family, people that loved him. That I loved him.

I would just sit and hold his hand, talking to him about nothing at all. Told him about my day, how the others were doing, about my friends that helped us. Just anything so I was talking to him.

I had found a couple rings of mine one night a week or so after he was in the hospital, finding one that Gavin would most likely wear if he liked it. I found one as well and put it on, bringing the other to put on Gavin the next day. Even if we weren’t really engaged, I wanted the others to know how dedicated I was, plus if the doctors were to question it, I’d just rather avoid the situation all together.

Six months after he came back, he healed enough that he didn’t need the breathing tube down his throat anymore. I was glad when they did, he didn’t look as helpless without it in him. He more or less just looked like he was sleeping.

Adam came back though a year or so afterwards. He told me he wanted to meet him, to meet the man I desperately wanted to save. I remember Adam telling me that he was glad it worked out in the end, despite the circumstances currently. We talked for a while, him asking about the rings and me explaining. At the end of his visit, I remember he looked at Gavin and then smiled at me, he told me that when he does wake up, that I should marry him. I had chuckled and waved him off.

Ever since his visit, I couldn’t help but think about that. Marrying Gavin after he wakes up. It would be a dream come true, and so far I’ve been willing to wait three years for him. I will wait for another twenty if I have to, I’ll always be here for him.

I love him so much.

*~*Gavin’s POV*~*

I remember everything hurting, then cold, and eventually nothing at all. I could barely remember anything at all after I was knocked out by Burnie. The only thing I could remember after feeling cold, was I thought I saw Ryan. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was just another cruel joke by Burnie, making me think Ryan was with me. But I saw him so clearly when I did, I touched his face, he smiled at me.

He cried over me. Ryan Vagabond, crying, now that would be something no one would believe if I told anyone. I can only imagine what the others would say if I tried telling them that I saw Ryan crying, they’d totally make fun of me for it. I remember the times I would steal glances at him while we were together, trying to memorize every detail about his face. Even when he got frustrated and yelled at me for doing something dumb, I could see he never was truly angry with me.

I wish I was with him right now, in his arms. I want to wrap my arms around him and feel him hold me close. I want him here, I need him here.

When I wanted to look for him did I realize it was dark. No, not just dark, it’s completely black. There’s absolutely nothing, no sound, no sight, just…nothing.

I wanted to speak but my mouth felt glued shut, I tried moving but my body was numb. I just wanted to feel something. I want to hear something. Anything.

I felt a firm grip on my hand, a soft rubbing sensation on the top. It felt nice, warm and loving and I just felt so relaxed as I enjoyed the feeling. As I longed for that feeling, I could feel more aware of myself. I couldn’t help but think of why someone would hold my hand. I always thought holding hands was kinda odd, but I never thought I’d actually enjoy it. And I could only think of one person that would want to hold my hand.

Ryan.

Ryan was holding my hand, he here. He was here with me and I wanted nothing more than to see him, tell him I love him, kiss him and just love him with every part of me. And while I thought about going back to him, it started to become lighter around me, not just all darkness. I focused on Ryan holding my hand, I want him back. I want him back now!

*~*~*~*

Everything was so bright when I opened my eyes, I squinted a bit to help until they adjusted. I could actually feel myself breathing, I felt heavy as I….laid in a bed. Once my eyes adjusted, I looked around the white room. A hospital room? It looked like it. Soft beeping filled my ears, looking to my side, I saw the heart monitor, following the small cables to myself. On the table in front of the bed was the biggest vase of roses and other flowers I have ever seen. It was massive and it was beautiful.

I heard soft snoring and I looked to my right, sleeping soundly hunched over on my bed was the most wonderful man in the world. He looked exhausted and a bit uncomfortable from my view. I looked at my hand and smirked, his fingers were laying delicately over mine having lost his grip in his sleep so it was easy to pull them out from under his. I gently ran my fingers through his messy hair, which way going every which way and I couldn’t help but smile when he shifted as I did.

After running my fingers through his hair for a few minutes, he muttered in his sleep.

“Mmmm….feels good…”

I couldn’t help but chuckle quietly, then I felt that my voice probably a bit scratchy. I noticed that when I had chuckled at him that he shifted a bit. His hand drew back to himself as he opened his eyes a bit. I smiled and ran my fingers through his hair again, this time resting my hand on his cheek gently. His shoulders adjusted a bit as he somewhat stretched in his spot as he woke up. He nuzzled into my head for just a moment until he fully woke up. He looked from where my hand was and followed up my arm to my face where he stared with wide eyes. He sat up slowly, my hand pulling away but he grabbed it softly, intertwining our fingers as relief started to cross his face.

“Gavin….”

I smiled at him, tightening my grip on his hand, seeing Ryan look at our hands since I could hold back.

“R-Ryan…” I whispered, Ryan’s head snapping back to me. Using his free hand, he cupped my cheek, looking me over as he just smiled.

“You’re awake….y-you’re finally awake. I-I’ve missed you so much…I’m so glad…..f-fuck. Gavin, I’ve been waiting a long time for this moment…” he leaned down, pressing his lips to mine. I lifted my on free hand, touching his face once more. His mouth moved with mine in a slow and passionate way, he pulled away and rested his forehead against mine, smiling at me. He pulled back, going over to the door, speaking quietly out to someone before coming back.

“What was that about?” I asked, looking at him when he sat down next to me.

“Had to tell the nurse to get the doctor who’s been treating you. To tell him that you’ve woken up,” he said, taking my hand once more. I was about to ask him a question when said doctor came into the room.

“Gavin Free, happy to have you back. You’ll been out for a while. Thankfully you have such a loving fiancé that hardly ever left your side.”

“F-fiancé? W-who’s my fiancé?” I asked nervously, Ryan squeezing my hand. I looked down at my left hand and saw a ring. It was a beautiful one but certainly wasn’t mine.

“Ryan here, he’s your fiancé. Don’t worry, it might just be because you just woke up that you aren’t remembering, I doubt you have any sort of amnesia.”

“You two keep talking about me waking up…?” I started to question.

“When you were brought here, after you had to have surgery, you fell into a coma…and you’ve been in a coma for a little over three years now, Gavin,” Ryan said softly. I just stared at him.

“N-no…seriously!?” I asked, starting to panic. What happened that I was in a coma? What about my friends? The Crew!? Ryan squeezed my hand again, the other against my cheek.

“We will talk later, Gav. Just relax so the doctor can check you out,” Ryan said. I nodded and let him check everything. After a bit, he got all he needed and excused himself. I looked to Ryan, about to ask him about everything but he just placed a finger to my lips.

“Don’t worry, I can explain everything…what do you want to know about first?” he asked me.

“Fiancé,” I said, he smirked, nodding.

“Figured. But don’t worry, I don’t think you have amnesia or anything when it comes to some things. When you were first brought here, you weren’t allowed visitors. I didn’t know if being your boyfriend would be enough to I told them we were engaged. I brought in one of my rings for you to wear in case they for some reason ever checked. Do you like it?” he asked.

I looked at it on my finger, checking out everything about it, smiling softly.

“It’s beautiful, simply amazing,” I said, looking at him.

“Good, cause it’s yours. I want you to have it. Seeing you wear it these past three years made me pretty damn happy. Maybe one day if we ever become officially engaged, you’ll have your ring already.”

I blushed, then looked at him again.

“Have I really been in a coma for three years?” I asked sadly. I have missed so much already, what’s gonna happen when I see everyone?

“Yeah, you have. Everyone comes often. They miss you a lot. It’s easier when we’re all together here, hanging out with you. Doesn’t seem as lonely. And we always hoped it didn’t make you feel lonely either.”

“O-okay,” I said softly, looking up to Ryan, “please…tell me everything that happened…I can’t really remember….About Burnie and the others. I don’t remember anything.”

“Well, I don’t really know exactly what they did to you, but they tried killing you by freezing you to death. When I found you, you weren’t breathing at all and just so fucking cold and I thought you were gonna die…I was so scared that day. Your almost died a few times actually, your heart stopped like three times during the ride to the hospital, and they told us it stopped during your surgery a couple times. But I used my coat to help warm you up and held you to me. Do you remember waking up during that?”

I could only shake my head, I don’t remember most of it. I remember Burnie taking me and hurting me, but that’s about it. I don’t really remember exactly what he did to me. Maybe it’ll come back, maybe not. I guess for something like that, it wouldn’t matter. Tears started to sting my eyes, Ryan already wiping them away.

“H-hey, it’s okay if you don’t. It was only for a minute anyway. If you need to cry, then cry, but you don’t need to be upset if you don’t remember. I love you so much, Gavin, that’s all that matters.”

“B-Burnie…” I whispered, glancing up at him, “What happened to Burnie?”

“In jail,” Ryan said, my eyes widening, “he was caught trying to leave Los Santos with Caboose. They were arrested by…a friend of mine, Tucker. We were able to convict him on some big charges. Things like keeping you prisoner, raping you, and trying to murder you. He’s been in jail this whole time, Caboose as well, and eventually the few others still in Liberty City fell apart since Burnie wasn’t there to keep it going. So when he finishes his sentence here for the next 20 years or so, he’ll be sent back and charged appropriately there.”

“What about the others?” I asked.

“Sarge and Simmons are dead, Caboose was the only one aside from Burnie that lived.”

“So, Burnie isn’t…”

“He isn’t going to be back ever again. Not with how much in Liberty City he has to pay for. If you’re willing, you can testify against him about Dan. Then he’ll have to face that as well. Killing a British soldier probably won’t be taken lightly. But that’ll be up to you,” he said, holding my hand tightly.

“I’ll have to think about it. I’d probably be hard seeing him again…”

“That’s alright, don’t worry about it right now. It probably wouldn’t be for a long time anyway,” Ryan said with a smirk.

“So, what about the crew? How is everyone? What’s been going on with everyone? What’s been going on with you lately?” I asked all at once.

“Not much has changed with them…well actually a few things,” he said smiling, “we have two new crew members. We almost had three but one didn’t really work out. But our two new crew members are named Kdin and Lindsay.”

“Really? Have they ever been here?” I asked, curious.

“Yeah, they’ve been here plenty of times. We all talk a lot so don’t be surprised if they know a lot about you. And also, that Lindsay girl? She and Michael seem be hitting it off well. Of all people, she chose Michael!” he laughed, and I was smiling ear to ear.

“I’m so happy for him! I can’t wait to meet her and Kdin!” I said excitedly, “Oh, I know you’d just love to keep me to yourself, but I want you to call the others! I want to see them again and meet my new friends!”

Ryan laughed and pulled out his phone, calling them. While we waited, I moved a little bit in my bed, making a little room so Ryan could lay with me. It was a little awkward with all the wires but he got settled and I cuddled up against his side, laying my head on his chest. His chin rested on top of my head as he mindlessly traced patterns on my back where I was turned, I doing the same on his stomach. Occasionally he’d move his head off mine to kiss my hair and go back. I tilted my head back a couple times so that he would kiss me on the lips. I hummed in delight, holding onto him as he did. He’d kiss all over my face. On my lips, my cheeks, forehead, even my ears if given the opportunity. Soon enough, the others arrived, all with excited faces, Ryan moving so he was sitting on the chair, letting me sit up on my own.

“Shit on my dick,” Geoff exclaimed, “So you finally woke up, eh?”

“Took your fucking sweet time, didn’t you? Dumbass,” Michael chuckled, a woman smiling next to him as they held hands.

“It’s finally nice to meet you, Gavin. I’m Lindsay,” she introduced, walking up when I offered to shake her hand. Another new face between Ray and Jack.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Kdin,” he smiled, shaking my hand as well.

“So glad I can finally meet you two, Ryan told me about you earlier,” I smiled, glancing over to Michael, raising an eyebrow seductively. He blushed and looked away with a scowl, making Lindsay giggle, Michael unable to help but grin at her when she did. I could already see that they were perfect for each other.

“How long have you been together?” I smiled.

“Couple years,” they both answered, and I couldn’t help but frown. I wonder what it was like when they first got together, how happy Michael was.

“Hey, don’t you start crying on me,” Michael said, “I actually made a special trip here on my own to tell you all about it. I had to tell my boi as soon as I could. I couldn’t wait for your lazy ass so I just told you about how excited and happy I was about such an amazing woman.”

“I remember you coming by,” Ryan said, “I had left the room to get something to eat, but I saw you leaving. I didn’t ask when I first saw, but I figured it out,” he chuckled.

“We’re just glad to have you back,” Jack said, finally speaking.

We all hung out for the day, I talked to Kdin and Lindsay a lot, getting to know them, answering their questions and asked my own. Apparently the others knew me very well since the two seemed to know about everything we talked about. Despite being in a coma for so long, I was exhausted by the end of the day. Everyone left when it got late, Ryan stayed behind though to keep me company.

“Why don’t you go home, Rye-Bread? You deserve a good night’s rest,” I laughed at him as he barely stayed awake.

“Nah, I spent a lot of nights here anyway, one more night won’t be any different,” he said. Rolling my eyes, I at least convinced him to join me back on the bed for a while. I laid in his arms as we watched some tv to just kill some time. I was starting to get tired and curled into him a bit as I dozed off, and before I was completely asleep, I could feel his arms tighten around me. I haven’t felt this good in such a long time, and I guess after three years...

I’m glad to be back.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter~ I'm kind of sad that it's over, but I have some good news at the end!

I ended up staying in the hospital for another couple weeks. The doctor that helped me wanted to make sure that I was able to go back home. They told me to keep it easy for a while, or maybe take a couple months of physical therapy to get a bit stronger. I didn’t really like the idea, but Ryan said he would go with me and would help me out on his own. I stood in the lobby with Ryan as he finished all the paperwork, probably for my bills and what not, I started fidgeting with the clothes I was wearing. My old clothes having been ruined, Ryan bought me new clothes, but they were super fancy that he normally got for himself. Which reminded me…

“Hey Ryan?” I looked to him, “What happened with the whole ‘James Haywood’ thing? I-I remember Burnie asking me if you were who you said you were, but I kept your secret…”

“We can talk about that when we get home,” he smiled, kissing me softly.

“Home?”

“Yeah,” he said, “I asked Geoff if you could move in with me into my own place. Not the Haywood house, but this really nice apartment I found. Top floor, with an amazing view of the city! I’ve been living there a while, and was hoping you would join me.”

“R-really!? That sounds awesome! But what about my things at Geoff’s? A-and just moving out of his house in general?” I asked, I’d been living with him for so long, is he really okay with it?

“Well, I didn’t move your things. I didn’t want you to feel like you had to move in with me. But it won’t be too hard to move your things if you want to.”

I nodded, asking if we could stop by Geoff’s house. Ryan happily agreed and called Geoff to see if we could meet up with him. He was at home so once we finally got done with the hospital and left, we went there. Geoff waited for us outside, hugging me when I got there, chuckling when he did.

“Well, get your asses in here,” he said, walking in as we followed, “I didn’t really touch anything of yours, just throwing away those photos away forever ago.”

I thanked him, going to my room, Geoff and Ryan talking to each other. I walked down the hall, nothing really changing at all as I walked into my room. Everything essentially was still the same, Geoff not having touched most of my things aside from cleaning, I could tell. I sat down then laid on my bed, looking up at the ceiling. I must’ve been laying here for a while, I heard a soft knock on my door, I looked and saw Ryan standing in the doorway.

“So…do you want to move in with me, or do you want to stay here?” he asked quietly, Geoff coming up behind him.

“I….Geoff…you don’t mind, do you?” I asked, scratched the back of my head.

“Well, you’ve been living here for so long, I don’t really care if you stay or go. But you really don’t want to live here with me when you’re gonna wanna spend most of your time with the Mad King,” Geoff smirked.

I decided to move in with Ryan, he helped me pack a few of my things, Geoff not minding that we come back for my other things. He was sad to see me moving out, but he was happy for me, hugging me after we packed what we could.

“It was fun having you here. Glad you’re moving in with Ryan, you deserve each other. I can tell you two would do anything for each other,” he smirked. I waved to him after we put my belongings in the trunk of Ryan’s car as we drove off.

“So where is the apartment, Ryan?” I asked, looking to him.

“Somewhat north of the city, but not too far from the others.”

“How big is the apartment? Just wondering,” I smiled at him.

“Eh, it’s not big by any means, but it isn’t small. Let’s see…it has two bedrooms, one bathroom, then there’s the living room, the kitchen and a dining room next to it.”

“Sounds pretty big. Why two bedrooms?”

“Wasn’t sure if you wanted to share a room right away, and if you don’t, that’ll be your room. But if you want to, it can just be a spare room or guest room if someone ever stays over for any reason,” he smiled. That really comforted me, that he was so considerate that I might not want to share a bed with him. I mean I want to, but that he was concerned with what I’d want first and not just expect me to sleep with him. I smiled at him and nodded, telling him I’d love to share a room with him. He seemed really happy about it. When we got there, I was in awe at our apartment, it was bigger than I thought, I swear it was almost as big as Geoff’s house since his only had the one floor.

“This place is huge!” I gasped, looking around, “You said it wasn’t that big,” I smirked at him.

“Is it big? I thought it was small…I guess my living at the uh…Haywood Mansion probably makes it seem small to me. Is it too big for you?”

“No! It’s great! I just thought it was funny that you thought this was a small apartment. It’s perfect!” I grinned.

“Alright,” he chuckled, “I’ll take your things to our room, you can…look around I guess? Not much to look at though.”

I watched him walk into his—our room, I made a mental note of that we lived together here. But since he’s lived here for a while, I almost only feel like a guest. I took my shoes off and left them at the door, walking through and looking at all the nice furniture and all the electronics. I didn’t want to touch anything or break anything, it all looked so nice and possibly fragile so I just sorta looked at it. I didn’t hear Ryan come up behind me until he put his hand on my shoulder, making me jump.

“You okay? You don’t have to worry about breaking anything, it’s all fixable or replaceable, it’s no bother to me,” he smiled gently, I smiled back. I turned and looked at him.

“Oh, I almost forgot, you said when we got home you’d tell me about the whole James Haywood thing.”

“Right,” he said as he remembered, “honestly after we got you back, it was pretty easy to convince Geoff that I didn’t have a secret identity. I was fully prepared to tell him all about it, but he didn’t want an explanation when you were kidnapped, just expecting one when we got you back. But when we did, he believed me that I wasn’t hiding anything. I’m surprised he believed me, honestly. I could tell he was losing trust in me for a while. But maybe it was because I proved that I could get you back, I’m not sure…”

I nodded, “So we still have a secret to keep?” I chuckled.

“And Ray, I told him. He said he’d keep it for us, and I’m truly grateful that he has all this time,” Ryan smiled, still with his hand on my shoulder, put the other on the other side and started rubbing my shoulders to help me relax, which I did, leaning back into him, his arms moving to wrap around my waist. He pulled me to the couch, laying down with me laying on top of him. I blushed at we would just lay there, my head on his shoulder as he traced patterns over my back. I did eventually relax until I dozed off on him.

*~*~*~*

I’d been living with Ryan for about a month in a half but it hasn’t really been that great. It wasn’t that we weren’t getting along or anything like that. But about a week or so after I had moved in fully, after getting the rest of my things, I started having nightmares. It had all started with the nightmare that I had before Burnie came back, the one where I missed my target and killed Ryan instead. I had shot up out of bed, waking Ryan as well since he was holding me. He asked me about it but at that moment, I wasn’t wanting to talk to him or anyone. He just had me lay back down, wrapping his arms around me, murmuring to me to help me calm back down to fall back asleep.

But almost every night since has been nightmare after nightmare. It was affecting both of us since he was a light enough sleeper that when I would wake up, even if I didn’t move a lot, he would wake up as well, then spent the next couple hours or sometimes the rest of the night staying awake with me trying to help me calm back down. I felt really bad about it since he hasn’t been sleeping much either, but he always told me not to worry about it, that he used to suffer from insomnia and was used to spending nights just laying awake. It didn’t really help me feel any better but I really couldn’t say anything since he wouldn’t go back to sleep even when I told him to.

*~*

_I got ready for bed for the night and was in the bathroom, brushing my teeth, I heard Ryan open the door and walk in, wrapping his arms around my waist, nuzzling his he head on my shoulder, looking at me as I brushed, smirking._

_“What?” I asked, toothbrush still in my mouth._

_“Mmm, nothing, you just look so beautiful…”_

_I chuckled a bit, spitting into the sink, “How so? I’m just brushing my teeth, Love.”_

_His grip tightened just slightly, him purring into my ear._

_“I can show you how…you’ve been so stressed lately. Come on, Gavvy, it’s been so long…”_

_“Rye-Bread, I’m exhausted, can we another night?” I asked, yawning as I put some things away that I could while still in his grasp. But he didn’t say anything, just tightening his grip more, it starting to become a bit uncomfortable._

_“Ry, come on, Love. Let me go…I’m not up for it tonight…” I sighed, whining when he tightened his grip more, it starting to hurt._

_“Ryan, please, I just-“ I turned around and froze. I stared up at who I thought was Ryan. His voice and reflection…it was so normal I thought it was him…not…not…_

_Burnie…._

_He smirked darkly, grabbing me by the throat, pushing me over the counter, holding me to the mirror. I cried as I struggled against his iron grip._

_“You think it’d be that easy for you to get away from me? Gavin you don’t know me at all…but don’t you worry…I’ll be back for you one of these days…we’ll never be apart from each other, I can guarantee that…”_

*~*~*~*

“NOOOOO!!” I cried as I shot up in the bed, getting out as Ryan was startled awake by my shout. I paced around the room until Ryan was fully awake.

“Gav? What’s wrong?? What happened?” he asked, concerned. I never screamed when I woke up, but most of my nightmares hadn’t been that bad.

“B-Burnie….” I whimpered as I sat back down on the bed next to him. He held onto my hand gently, rubbing it soothingly.

“What about Burnie? Gav it’s alright, he’s in jail, he can’t hurt you anymore…”

I shook my head, holding back whimpers as I told him about what happened in the dream. He pulled me onto his lap, letting me burry my face into his chest as he held me close. I did my best to hold back the tears but they wouldn’t stop. I at least was able to keep myself from openly sobbing like a child, I knew Ryan wouldn’t mind if I did, but I could just tell that it would be hard on both of us if I did. I knew he just would partially blame himself that he couldn’t do anything for me.

This was the first nightmare that specifically had Burnie in it. The first nightmare wasn’t him, it was just a figure like the first time I had it when I killed Ryan. The other nightmares were of Ryan and the others getting hurt and me being powerless to do anything. Others were just me missing out on everything, nightmares that I missed Michael and Lindsay getting married, not even knowing they were together. Nightmares that the crew had broken up during my coma, everyone having their own lives. Geoff, Jack, Michael all getting married, starting their own families. Even nightmares that Ryan gave up that I was going to wake up and had moved on, getting married and having his own family. It was hard having those nightmares, but this one was truly terrifying cause of Burnie. I didn’t know what to do, how do I stop this? I had fallen asleep in Ryan’s arms again, not really dreaming, just there with him as he would lay us back down, holding me to him once more.

*~*~*~*

“Gavin, are you sure you want to do this? You don’t have to, you know,” Ryan said as he gripped my hand tightly, lifting it up, kissing it. I smiled softly at him, nodding as we sat together. I took a few breaths to calm myself, what on earth was I doing? Why am I here?

Ryan and I were at the Los Santos prison, here to visit Burnie. Ever since I had the first nightmare of him attacking me at our apartment, most of my nightmares had been about him. They varied from how furious he would be and beat me to just him acting somewhat calm and I guess normal when I used to live with him in Liberty City. It was just exhausting for both of us for me to have these nightmares and I don’t even remember how I even thought about this, but here we were. I doubt this would really change anything, but maybe just some closure would help out, or to just prove to myself that Burnie can’t hurt me anymore.

We were sat inside the prison, at some tables to sit across from the prisoner, just waiting for the guards to bring Burnie out. My grip on Ryan’s hand tightened when I heard the heavy metal doors open, followed by chains clanging on themselves as they came closer. The came from behind, my body going rigid as Burnie passed us to be seated on the other side of the table. They didn’t remove his cuffs until he was cuffed to the table. I couldn’t look up at him at first, when I glanced to Ryan, he was staring ahead at Burnie. I took a few breaths and looked up at him as well, our eyes locking right away. He looked as if he’s aged 20 or 30 years, I was shocked at how much his looks changed. I clenched my jaw and Burnie only smirked.

“It’s been awhile, Gavvy,” he purred, “though I wasn’t really expecting you to survive those years ago. You’re a stubborn one, aren’t you? How was your coma? Too bad that you were out for so long, so much has happened since I last saw you!”

“Shut the fuck up, Burns,” Ryan growled, “we didn’t come here to be taunted by you.”

Burnie glared at Ryan, I could see how much he hated Ryan, hated that I’m with him.

“Then what are you here for, Vagabond?” he hissed.

“Gavin wanted to come here, ask him.”

Burnie turned his glare to me.

“Come to gloat, have you? You think you’ve outsmarted me? That you’re better than me? Well you aren’t. I may be in here, but as soon as I get out, I’m coming for you.”

“No you aren’t,” I finally spoke up, meeting his glare, “Burnie….you lost. It’s over. You don’t own me anymore, just give it up.”

Burnie tried standing, anger coming off him in waves but the cuffs held him to the table, he sat back down, cursing me.

“You’re just a godamn piece of shit, Free. You were nothing until I brought you in. You made stupid mistakes that I had to clean up, I gave you a purpose in life! Without me you’d still be on the streets, I gave you everything, and this is how you repay me!?”

“Keeping me locked up, beating me, always putting me down….raping me….you really think that’s what I wanted from you? I didn’t ask for anything, you dragged me in from the very beginning. You’re the one that’s nothing, Burnie. I know Cock Bite is done, you can’t fix that. Sarge and Simmons are dead, Caboose is here with you.”

“You underestimate me, Free. I will get out, Caboose will get out, and we’ll get Cock Bite going again. You’ll see,” he chuckled darkly.

Ryan gritted his teeth as we talked, I could tell he just wants to beat the living daylights out of Burnie. I sighed.

“Burnie…I came here today because I wanted to tell you two things. The first was how it was over, the other was that I know it’s over because I’ve decided to testify against you about Dan’s murder. Dan will get the justice he deserved, and you’ll pay for what you’ve done over the years.”

“Gavin…” Ryan started, I just shook my head.

“Burnie, I had a lot of time to think about this, about coming to see you and about what you’ve done. I decided that I’m not gonna let you ruin my life anymore,” I muttered. I looked at Ryan, squeezing his hand. Burnie mad a noise of disgust as I nodded to a guard, signaling I was done. We stood as two guards went to Burnie’s side, a third walking us out as Burnie just muttered curses at us as we left.

Once outside, I took a few heavy breaths as I looked at Ryan. He smiled sympathetically.

“Are you going to be alright?” he asked softly, his smile turning to a soft frown as he brought his hands to my face, using his thumb to wipe away a couple tears that had formed. I blinked and wiped my eyes myself.

“Sorry ‘bout that, didn’t know I started to tear up. It’s just…hard, to say the least, to be around Burnie. Even if he was in chains, he made my life a living hell for all those years, and took awake three of them that I couldn’t even experience because he tried to murder me…” I sighed.

“Hey, it’s alright…I know this is such a hard time for you, but I’m here for you, Gav. I promise that.”

“Thanks Ry, I love you,” I smiled softly, moving to kiss him softly on the lips, walking with him to our car. We headed over to the shop to hang out with the others. Now that everything was back to normal, we had things to catch up on. We started planning heists, naming different locations to be hit and deciding who was planning them. I sat next to Ryan as we discussed the heists, his arm wrapped around my waist, Michael and Lindsay next to us as they held hands. I smiled as I looked at them then gazed over to Kdin, it was so great working with them.

When I got back into the gang and actually started working with them, I definitely started seeing their skills and saw why Geoff wanted them to join. They were bloody brilliant out on a mission, I’ve seen it first hand when Lindsay had to make sure I didn’t get shot when we were dragged into a gang fight. Ryan wasn’t too happy that I almost got hit.

“You’re gonna get got one of these days, idiot,” Michael had told me, laughing.

*~*~*~*

I was glad that talking to Burnie did help, I still occasionally had a nightmare, but it wasn’t anything too terrible. Just a normal nightmare if there was such a thing.

The night after we went to see Burnie, I went to bed with Ryan as usual, both expecting for me to wake up. But I didn’t, I actually woke to the sound of the alarm clock going off, Ryan’s arms wrapped protectively around me. I snuggled into his chest as he woke as well. The first thing he did was kiss the top of my head before reaching over and shutting off the alarm. I wrapped my arms around his surprisingly small waist and held him close, mumbling something about not wanting to get up. He chuckled and only kissed the top of my head again, whispering sweet nothings to me as I tried to wake up. He had paused for a moment and I had looked up at him.

“What’s the matter, Rye-Bread?” I had asked, he only smiled, nuzzling our foreheads together, earning a tired noise out of me.

“You didn’t have a nightmare last night, you didn’t wake up. That’s wonderful!”

I hadn’t even realized until he said anything, I just smiled like an idiot and buried my face into his chest once more, happy that I finally got a full night’s rest.

*~*~*

I sighed one morning, laying sprawled all over the bed, it a complete mess from the night before. I woke to the sound of Ryan showering, I sat up, stretching and then standing, my sheet falling away as I made my way to the bathroom. I quietly opened the door, peeking in to seeing Ryan’s silhouette through the shower door. I carefully went up and made sure he wasn’t facing me as I slipped into the shower, making sure the door didn’t make any noise as I silently slipped in, wrapping my arms around his waist as he washed his hair. He jumped a little bit, but continued to shower, rinsing his hair of the lather.

“Want to shower together, I presume?” he purred as the water ran down his body onto me.

“Hmm, not exactly,” I purred back, he made a confused grunt, I responded by grinding against him.

“Ah, I see,” he chuckled. He finished rinsing his hair and turned to face me. He smirked but turned us around so I was under the water spray, getting soaked immediately. He swapped us again, connecting our lips together. I hummed as his hands wrapped around me, one tangling into my hair as he grabbed a handful, the other on my hip as he pushed me back against the wall, grinding hard against me. I moaned in pleasure, my hands wrapped around him grabbing onto his back.

His hand moved from my hip to my cock, taking hold of me and slowly pumping me. I groaned, trying to grind into his hand, holding onto his back. After getting me completely hard, Ryan pulled away, wordlessly motioning me to turn around. He pulled away a little bit, letting me turn around.

“Bend over, Gavin. You can use the wall to steady yourself,” he whispered as I did. I could feel the warm water running over my body, I relaxed at the feeling until I moaned when Ryan introduced a first finger into me. I pushed back against him but his other hand stopped me from doing so as his he inserted the second. I shuddered in pleasure as he stretched me, slipping in a third to finish up before pulling his fingers out. I gasped when he did, whimpering in need as he teased my entrance with the tip of his cock.

“R-Ryan, please…” I gasped in need, he chuckled as he pushed in as slowly as he could, making me moan. I panted as he rested inside me, letting me adjust to him. After a moment, I pushed back against him, begging him to move. His hands were on my hips as he pulled out then started thrusting into me at a slow pace. I moaned as he did, wanting him to go faster but he wouldn’t for the longest time. He did slowly start going faster, I moaned as he did, getting close to my sweet spot. As Ryan moved faster, the rhythm became more and more sporadic, leaving me a moaning mess. My face pressed against the tile of the shower wall, Ryan’s grasp on my hips tightening as he grunted, moaning as well. His thrusts became harder and he hit my spot, I cried out in pleasure as my whole body trembled.

“Ah! R-Ryan! R-right there!!”

His grip tightened a bit more as he rammed the same spot over and over again. I clawed at the wall, I could feel my climax approaching, that familiar feeling boiling inside me. I panted, groaning deeply as Ryan grabbed onto me once more, pumping me hard.

“G-Gavin,” he murmured into my ear, I moaned as I reached my climax, crying out his name, cumming into his hand, my muscles tightening around his cock. He moaned into my back as he released inside me, holding me up as I almost wanted to collapse from how wonderful I felt just now. He pulled out, panting as he pulled me into his arms, attaching his lips to my neck, nipping at the skin. I hummed in delight as he did until I pulled away.

“Okay, I’m ready for the shower now, Rye-Bread,” I smirked, he laughed and grabbed the body wash, handing it to me, telling me to wash up. He took the bottle from me once I was done, starting to wash himself once more. We cleaned up pretty quick, finishing up together and got out. I grabbed the only towel in the bathroom and quickly left. Ryan realizing it a moment later.

“Gavin, you fuck! Bring me my towel back!” I heard him shout, trying to hold in a laugh. I snickered from the bedroom, not answering him. Eventually I heard him come out and walk to the bedroom, standing in the doorway, arms crossed as he just stood there nude.

“Now isn’t that a delightful sight,” I grinned, sitting on the bed, towel wrapped around my waist. He just smirked not saying anything, suddenly rushing me, pouncing me on our bed. I laughed as he held me down, wrestling with me as he grabbed at the towel.

“There’s more in the closet, you doughnut!” I laughed, “Just get another one!”

“I don’t care, that’s my towel!” he laughed, eventually getting a hold of it, pulling it off me. He proclaimed his victory then tied it around his own waist.

“Get ready, Gavin. We have to get to the shop soon,” he said to me, grabbing another towel from the closet, throwing it at me.

“Alright, alright! I’ll get ready now,” I smirked as he rolled his eyes, going back to the bathroom. I dried myself off in our room, quickly dressing. I waited for my turn in the bathroom, finishing getting ready as he got dressed. I got my hair all done up and went to the living room as I waited for Ryan. He came up behind the couch, letting me know we were good to go. I got up and followed him up the stairs to the door, going to the garage and got in the car. We rode through town to downtown and met up with the others. I walked in, greeting my friends as we all gathered together to make plans and figure out who still needed to pay for our services.

As I looked at everyone around me, I smiled at what a great life I have, despite how weird it is. I sat next to Ryan as he and Geoff talked, Michael and Ray talking to me about hanging out some night. I smiled and agreed. As Ryan and I talked to the others, in one way or another, our hands would always end up holding each other, fingers intertwining as we carried on with our day. It was definitely a life not many people lived, but it was my life. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Hope you enjoyed the shower sex, that is my gift to you)
> 
> Thank you so much for all the support! I had a blast writing this fic and I'm glad you've enjoyed it! But not to worry! I'm working on a sequel for this fic and I'm also going to probably do other oneshot fics based on this AU. Who knows, maybe I'll have others things to write with it. And I'll probably write other AUs too. Again, thank you so much and if you'd like, you can follow me on Tumblr, nattiebug14.tumblr.com
> 
> Thanks so much, I love you all!


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